Invader Zim · Season 1
[Dib, obsessing over Zim, snaps a pencil in half. He sticks half up his nose]
Ms Bitters, I think a pencil is lodged in my brain. Can I go to the nurse?
How far in your brain?
[looks down] Pretty far...
All right. Take the auxiliary hall pass. [points to a radiator with 'Hall Pass' spray-painted on the side]
Hey! Where's your hall pass?
Say...you're full of organs, aren't you?
Why yes. Yes I am.
And you wouldn't notice if you were, say, missing a few?
Probably not.
[Zim starts laughing evilly and Hall Monitor joins in]
That's it, Zim! This has to stop!
I'm afraid I don't know what you're talking about.
Look at you! You've gone too far! You're a hideous blob of stolen organs!
I've been working out...
[Zim vomits an intestine, then sucks it back into his mouth and smiles]
You think you can fool a trained medical professional?
Yes.
I suppose you've got a heart in there?
Six of them.
Intestines?
Large or small?
Spleen?
In three different colors.
What about lungs?
[Zim, piloting his Voot Cruiser, scares a police officer driving his car, causing him to fall from a bridge onto a weenie restaurant]
Human law enforcing machine. Markings: Lighty flashy things on top. Defensive capability: minimal.
[The police car explodes]
Explodes on impact with giant meat. Evaluation: Pathetic! Pathetic Earth vehicle!!
Ruined. Ruined! Irken engineering reduced to...this! Surely that was no human bee! Once I take care of the humans, I will begin my war against...the bees!
Don't come any closer! Don't try anything on me or I'll...I'll...I'll lay eggs in your stomach! I mean it!
GIR! I've been captured!
YAY!
No, that's bad GIR!
YAY!
You're the one we've been waiting for! The one foretold in the prophecies, told by... Frank!
Yup. Told you he'd come.
[in robotic voice] I am Government Man, come from the government. The government has sent me. [zooms inside to see GIR piloting the robot] [walks over to Zim] Ohohoho. He is not an alien lifeform. He is an experimental government aircraft!
What's the matter, Zim? Don't they have rain on your planet?
Of course! We...oh, such rain we had! Eh...it was...delicious!
[Zim is carrying Gaz to protect himself from the rain]
If you want to keep all your limbs, Zim, you will put me down. You will put me down, NOW!
That was your fate of the world work? Jumping in a puddle?! You do realize I have to destroy you now.
It was worth it. Score 1 for the human race, score NOTHING for the Zim... thingy... race.
I will destroy you.
I swear, sometimes I amaze myself at how amazingly I–
[Zim jumps out from behind a wall and scares Dib, and Dib falls backwards into a puddle.]
...How amazingly you fall into a puddle? I agree!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Invader Zim pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
