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S4 E2

Hell's Kitchen · Season 4, Episode 2

“Episode Two” quotes from Hell's Kitchen

11 quotes

“Episode Two” · Season 4, Episode 2

In this episode: Gordon (10), Christina Machamer (2), Petrozza (2), Jason Underwood (2), Jean-Philippe (1), Matt Sigel (1), Bobby (1), Corey (1)

Good morning!

CContestants

Good morning, chef.

Bright and breezy!

CContestants

[groaning] Yes, chef.

With everything you wasted last night on service, any restaurant would've gone out of business. You have to understand what you put in... the trash last night! Hey guys - hup! [garbage truck drives up] I've never seen so much fantastic produce wasted. Now. Every rubber chicken breast, every overcooked risotto, every rock hard potato you binned last night: get it out and put it back in the cylinders, move!

(interview) We're fucking playing through garbage this is going to suck!

[Gordon makes everyone dig into the garbage for all the food that the chefs wasted the night before.]

You should be ashamed of yourselves. We're not talking about a couple of hundred dollars. We're in for thousands of dollars there, carelessly just put in the trash as if... no-one gives a fuck. You all better start giving a damn. Now go and get showered, and meet me in the kitchen; you stink!

(interview) I've never been on a yacht before. The only boat I've gotten close to was The Love Boat on TV.

Petrozza.

Yes?

The menu. Five appetisers. What are they?

The appetizers... Caesar salad with... with fresh anchovies and seared uh... tuna, the um... the um... the um... [chuckles quietly]

Stop. Stop! Do me a favour: get out.

Okay.

Hey, look at me. Upstairs - hey! - and read that FUCKING menu! And listen, your station stands unmanned until you get your fucking shit together!

Okay.

Hurry up! [Petrozza leaves the kitchen to memorize the menu] Is it really too much to know the menu inside and out? Eat, drink, sleep, breathe it? I've got 3,000 dishes between my ears. Pathetic.

It’s not even fucking hot! [calls Petrozza] Come here, Petrozza! Oh, here we fucking go. Touch that. You, touch that. (to Bobby) Please touch that. There you go. Touch, touch, touch, touch, touch, touch.

It's rare. It's rare. It needs more fire.

Aggggh, [throws spoon] SHIT! SHIT!

(to Sharon) Where's the beef?

SSharon

Sorry, chef.

(reads a ticket) Two salmon, one beef, one wellington. Unbelievable. Have you asked Christina?

SSharon

No, I didn't. I thought it was coming. She (Christina) just yelled that it was coming.

You're not really a chef, aren't you? You're just a showgirl with a big feather coming out of your ass.

You (Christina) and you (Sharon) are putting the kitchen to shit. Can you move and wake up a bit, please, yes?

Yes, chef!

You're both pissing around like a pair of Barbie twins! [Sharon sticks her tongue out] Sharon, you're scaring me. You look like the female version of fucking Hannibal Lecter. Put your fucking tongue in and concentrate.

SSharon

Yes, chef.

Hannibal!

[Matt's garnish pan catches fire]

Watch, he's going to set this place on fire. What the fuck are you trying to do? Can't fucking win in here so you set the place on fire!

No, chef.

Is that your little motive?

No, not at all chef.

Yeah? I've never seen such fucking flames from gnocchi!

Sorry chef, won't happen again.

(to a customer) It's raw? Okay, we'll do another one for you. (brings the dish to the pass)

Oh, fuck off.

That's Table 31, Chef. This is not cooked.

Blue. Come here, you. Oi, all of you, come here. (to Sharon) You've stopped. (to Christina) You've given up. (to Matt) You're setting the place on fire. (to Jason) And you're sending me raw fish, that's fucking cold and fucking raw. [angrily throws the fish in the bin]

It's not mine.

"It's not mine?" How dare you? It's just come back from the table.

Oh, okay.

SHUT IT DOWN! (to Jean-Philippe) GET THE FUCKERS OUT!

Christina, why should you stay in Hell's Kitchen? Truthfully?

I should stay in Hell's Kitchen because I am intelligent chef. If I am being condescending to someone like Corey, she needs to come tell me, it's not something I'd do to her to be personal. I will get better and I will [starts crying] fight for it... that's why I should stay.

Thank you. Jen, why should you stay in Hell's Kitchen?

It's unfortunate for you, that you don't get to see what goes on when we do prep chef. I'm a beast back there. I know what I'm doing, I work hard and I get the food out, [abridges Jen's absurdly long plea and shortened clips of some of her sentences] There's so much creativity and I really ask you to give me the opportunity chef because this is not the end for me, it's really not.

Breathe!

I'm breathing chef... May I say one last thing?

Oh fuck me!

Alright.

Before I make my decision, there's something I'd like to say. This is one of the most important prizes ever. An executive chef's decision in my own restaurant. I am not just going to give this job to someone who I do not believe in. And there's someone here that I just don't believe in. [brief pause] So, the person leaving Hell's Kitchen is... Sharon.

(whispers) Fuck.

Sharon clearly showed great attention to detail. Unfortunately, it wasn't for her cooking. It was for her makeup.

These quotes come from Wikiquote's Hell's Kitchen pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.