We are free and fairly sober
With so many toys to build
The machines are kind of tricky
Probably someone will be killed
But we gladly work for nothing
Which is good because we don't intend to pay
The elves are back to work today
Hooray!
We have just a couple hours
To make several billion gifts
And the labor isn't easy
Then you'll all work triple shifts
You can make the job go quicker
If you turn up the controls to super speed
It's back to work on Xmas Eve
Hooray.
And though you're cold and sore and ugly
Your pride will mask the pain
Let my happy smile warm your hearts
There's a toy lodged in my brain
We are getting awfully tired
And we can't work any faster
And we're very, very sorry
Why you selfish little bastards!
Do you want the kids to think
That Santa's just a crummy empty handed jerk?!
Then shut your yaps and back to work!
Now it's very nearly Xmas
And we've done the best we could
These toy soldiers are poorly painted
And they're made from inferior wood
I should give you all a beating
But I really have to fly
If I wasn't stuck here frozen
I'd harpoon you in the eye
Now it's back into our tenements
To drown ourselves in rye
You did the best you could I guess
And some of these gorillas are okay
HOORAY!
We're adequate!
The elves have rescued Xmas Day
Hooray!
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