Robert Romano quotes from E.R.

Romano

Were my instructions in any way... . unclear?

Kerry

No, I-I think you made your position known.

Romano

And you decided to ignore it?

Kerry

I took it under advisement.

Romano

I see. Okay, well, then, you're suspended. Sign out your patients and go home.

Kerry

Robert, let's not...

Romano

Right now, Kerry. Right now.

Kerry

Suspended.

Romano

Effective immediately and until further notice.

Romano

Luka? What is that, Croatian for "lucky"?

Luka

No, Luke.

Romano

You sure?

Luka

Yeah.

Benton

Are you allergic to any plants?

Elizabeth

I don't think so.

Benton

You have a garden?

Elizabeth

I went camping.

Romano

Tell me you know what poison ivy looks like.

Elizabeth

Poison ivy... is that in Wisconsin?

Romano

Oh boy.

Benton

So, what is my position here?

Romano

You have no position here, Peter.

Benton

You're firing me?

Romano

No, no, no, no! You fired yourself.

Kerry

Did you even take the Hippocratic Oath?

Romano

I had my fingers crossed.

Benton

You couldn't pay me enough to work for you, you arrogant little prick.

Romano

Fair enough. Keep working on those people skills, Peter.

Benton

I don't like being used.

Romano

Everybody is being used, Peter. It's what makes the world go 'round.

Romano

Hey, Greene. Tell me you are not giving free needles to junkies.

Romano

No, no, no, no, on no basis, it's illegal.

Mark

Not if there's a public health emergency which there is.

Romano

How much of your brain did they cut out?

Mark

This does not put extra needles on the street.

Romano

I don't care. We're not gonna have a bunch of low-life junkies parading in and out of here.

Mark

So you're not interested in cutting back on HIV and... [struggling to get the word out]

Romano

And? What? Sounds like..?

Mark

Hep...

Romano

Hep?

Mark

Hep.

Romano

Hep? Heparin? Heptathlon?

Mark

Hepatitis.

Romano

Tough one. Tell you what, you wanna start a needle exchange do it from your house.

Romano

Kerry, we have a little personnel problem; well, you do. Mark Greene.

Kerry

Mark.

Romano

Yeah. He's walking around with attitude, he's handing out needles, he's blanking out on words...

Kerry

Yeah, it's swelling from the chemotherapy wafers.

Romano

[Sarcastically] Well... really.

Kerry

He has mild expressive aphasia. It's temporary.

Romano

Well, I don't like it.

Kerry

Well, I don't think he likes it, either.

Romano

Now come on, you haven't noticed any personality changes?

Kerry

Like what?

Romano

Like he got very confrontational with me.

Kerry

Well, you're used to confrontation, Robert.

Romano

We are not talking about me.

Kerry

Isn't that your favorite subject?

Romano

Just straighten him out.

Romano

Dr. Carter, are you deaf? I keep shouting, you keep getting on the elevator?

Carter

Sorry.

Romano

Is this the pre-op amputation?

Carter

No, this is the post-op amputation.

Romano

What? In the field?

Carter

Yes, he was trapped, his pressure was dropping. Dr. Benton talked me through it.

Romano

Oh, what did they use, a chainsaw? You did this?

Carter

There was nobody else to do it.

Romano

Oh, well, no one else could do it. Well, by all means, then, let's get whoever's available. [to paramedic] Maybe you ought to try it it next time.

Kerry

Yeah, maybe if you'd respond to your page...

Romano

I can't wear my pager in the dojo. Brenda knew where I was; you should have called her. Let's go. What the hell happened, anyway? You blew it on the first leg, you decided to do the other one?

Patients with psychological problems falsely accuse their doctors of all sorts of things. I had a guy today blame me for hypnotizing him in order to drink his blood.

Romano

Well, we'll have to look into that another day, Donald. But the fact is, to the best of my knowledge, you are not actually a vampire.

Elizabeth

I took a little time off to recoup some energy, but now I'm fine!

Romano

Well, then that would explain the baby monitor I see strapped to your belly. Or are you just glad to see me?

Romano

[To a very pregnant Elizabeth] Are you sure you can still reach the table?

Elizabeth

At least I can see the table...

Romano

You had better choose your battles very carefully. You are the Chief of Emergency Medicine, not the County's lesbian advocate.

Kerry

That's where you are wrong, Robert, because I am both. I am the Chief of Emergency Medicine and I am a lesbian. And if you pursue this matter any further I will take it to the County Board of Supervisors, the ACLU, the press, and anyone else who will listen. So, I suggest you choose your battles very carefully.

Romano

Did you page her?

Mark

What?

Romano

Did you page her?

Mark

No.

Romano

[to someone on the phone] I need you to page Dr. Corday. [it's unclear what the person on the phone said, but it annoys Romano] I DON'T-- I KNOW THAT. Page her!