Pacey Witter quotes from Dawson's Creek

Joey

You can't see them very well, can you? At night, in the city.

Pacey

[Looks at her, surprised to see her. Then he smiles] What? The stars? Um, no you can't see them very well, but what the hell, I've seen them all before, right? [They pause and look at each other, then Joey smiles]

Joey

Me too.

Dawson

What the hell are we doing here?

Pacey

I want to show you something. [Waiting for Dawson to get out of the car] Now according to my brother, your father was driving down the road here at about 45 mph, which is granted, a little bit above the speed limit, but not at all unusual for this stretch of road. At the same time, a man name Gary Peters was getting off work, driving down the road a little farther up, just around the bend. Gary Peters is a pretty average guy. 35 years old, wife, two kids, works as a baggage handler for Blue Star Airlines, and Gary had to pull a double shift that day and it must have been a real bitch, because when he came around that bend he was asleep at the wheel.

Dawson

Why are you doing this Pacey?

Pacey

Why? Because I want you to know that it was a man named Gary Peters who killed your father. A guy who should have known better than to get behind the wheel of a car, a guy who for the rest of his life will carry around the guilt of taking Mitch Leery away from his wife and two kids and I want you to know that that guy is not you. It's not you Dawson. Do not blame yourself for this. You want to grieve, go right ahead, be my guest, but do not for one single second think that this is your fault, because it is not your fault. You got your father for 18 years and that is a hell of a lot more than some people get and your father did one hell of a job Dawson. He made you into a man. He made you into a man that people care about and admire and respect and most importantly, love. So why am I doing this? I'm doing this because once upon a time, you and I were best friends and that means that whenever you need me, I'm here; anytime, anywhere, any place, forever. You understand that?

Dawson

We should get going.

Charlie

Man, you have managed to land two of the most high maintenance women I have ever met. How did you do it?

Pacey

High maintenance is just another way of saying high quality.

Joey

Who's Karen?

Pacey

Do you really want to have that conversation now?

Joey

Uh, no. Sorry. Sugar high.

Pacey

What the whole world needs is a good old-fashioned urban legend.

Jack

Yeah, that's all we need... more predictable stories about a guy with a hook for an arm that kills the amorous couple.

Pacey

Hey, those stories exist for a reason, Jack.

Joey

Right, to discourage teenagers from drinking and having sex in the woods.

Joey

Maybe I've just lost the will to scream.

Pacey

Oh, please. You were once and will forever remain the number one skittish kitten in my life.

Pacey

It's not to worry. It's part of your charm.

Pacey

So, Dawson... Dawson Leery!

Dawson

That's my name.

Pacey

Yep! Well, come on man.

Dawson

Come on what?

Pacey

Why, oh, why did you choose to take the lovely and talented Jen Lindley away for the weekend?

Jack

A woman even my tribe can't resist.

Pacey

And here you are not sharing the details?

Dawson

There's nothing to share.

Pacey

Really? So that's why you've been staring at the bathroom door like you wish you had telekinetic powers? Which means to me that either you are very, very concerned about Audrey's wardrobe or, perhaps, you're concerned about Joey?

Jack

You call me crazy but I don't think Joey's gonna mind a little kissing. Unless, of course, something more happened.

Pacey

Now, there's an interesting idea, but what more could have happened?

Dawson

Guys, I'm not gonna go over the bases with you.

Pacey

I didn't say bases, did you say bases?

Jack

Guys, we don't need details.

Dawson

Alright, I'll be right back.

Jack

He did!

Pacey

You think?!

Jack

Oh yeah, definitely did. Do you feel different?

Pacey

I do! I do, I feel...different. I mean here we have Dawson Leery walking amongst us, and I gotta tell ya, I'm a little worried he wasn't prepared - we didn't even get a chance to have the talk!...how do you know?

Jack

Mm. It's not so much him as it is her. I mean, as sick as this sounds, I know the look.

Pacey

Oh man...you know, we almost did too.

Jack

I know, I know . . . come to think of it, we almost did once too.

Pacey

Hmm...What do you think it takes?

Jack

A virgin and a straight guy.

Pacey

Damn...

Audrey

Tell me something. Does this sort of thing usually work with the ladies?

Pacey

What sort of thing?

Audrey

The 'if I'm this passionate about the sensual art of cooking, imagine how good I am in bed' thing?

Pacey

Mm hmm.

Audrey

Imagine how good you'd do if you actually trimmed your nails.

Audrey

You totally want me.

Pacey

Audrey, if you're attracted to me, you can just say so. We don't have to play all these childish games.

Audrey

Hmm, Pacey... you're really nice and everything. It's just that... I don't know. You're kind of... boring.

Jen

If that's what the people want, if they want me to be nasty and sarcastic, I can do that. I just need something that's gonna take me there. Pacey, say something disgusting.

Pacey

Sure, would you prefer sexist or just downright vulgar? [Jen's cell phone rings]

Jen

Hold that thought. [Answers her phone] Hello. [in a sweet, childish voice] Hello, my little pumpkin.

Pacey

Oh, you are so fired.

Jen

If you had a relationship question, wouldn't you rather talk to somebody who was in a healthy, loving relationship?

Pacey

Hell no! I always prefer to get my advice from people who are far more dysfunctional than I am; that way I feel good about my life.

Pacey

[after he has mistaken his one night stand's name] Oh come on, sweetheart, don't leave angry. Or if you must, at least don't drive angry.

Have a nice life, Stacey.

Pacey

How do you do that thing?

Audrey

What thing?

Pacey

You smile and the whole world lights up.

Audrey

You're not my type. You're not my type.

Pacey

You already said that.

Audrey

I know. I'm just... convincing myself.

Pacey

If something happened between me and Audrey, it would be a horrible, terrible, awful thing, right?

Joey

Pacey, you're an idiot.

Pacey

Ok. If one more person calls me an idiot, I'm really gonna start feeling bad about myself.

Joey

Don't you think I'd prefer you hooking up with someone amazing like Audrey rather than some random ditz who's name you can't even remember in the morning?