Of course, it didn't help any that I can't have children. I'm not sterile; in fact, it's a rare condition called hyper-virility. Apparently my sperm shoot through the egg like bullets. Can you believe that?
I can't. But you can, so that's fine.
[raising a glass] To the empowerage of words.
To the irony of that sentence.
[On seeing Jeff and Pierce's presentation materials] Why are there costumes involved? These are short conversations, they're not supposed to take...
...Your breath away? Well, tough.
[After seeing Jeff and Pierce's presentation] F. F-minus.
Did you say "S"?
Hey, you know what today is? [Hands Britta a card] It's the two week anniversary of my horrible first impression.
There's a card for that?
Not specifically, but if you think of grandsons as a metaphor for friendship, I think you'll agree with this Transformer here that it's time for ours to become a man, by reading from the Torah.
Why don't we go get a beer? I'll give you some advice, and we can have what the kids are calling a 'sausage fest.'
Can we have a protest? I want to protest the hell out of something.
We can have a candlelight vigil, like lesbians have on the news!
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