Piper Halliwell quotes from Charmed

Phoebe

I'm bummed for you Piper, but I've got to tell you, Leo is looking fine!

Piper

I thought you said you didn’t see anything.

Phoebe

I didn’t… at least nothing good!

Piper

Phoebe, I know you're upset Leo crashed your lunch date but...

Phoebe

No, it's not that. Cole is pulling away from me again, I can see it.

Piper

Premonition?

Phoebe

Intuition.

Leo

We'll help you out.

Prue

No, no, no. I'll hit the book alone. Your guys couple issues are really starting to hurt my head.

Piper

Wait, we have couple issues?

Prue

Resentment. Denial. Be nice!

Piper

Here he is. Vinceres, hmm... Pretty much lives up to his gloss. Unstoppable hitman. Just keeps going until he gets his target.

Phoebe

Great. The energizer demon.

Prue

What is your problem?

Piper

You are. Get your own damn club and keep your paws off of mine!

Prue

Okay, whoa, obviously somebody needs a Midol. (Andras peeks inside the kitchen)

Piper

And I am so sick of all of your stuff laying around. If you can't put your equipment away, then I will! (grabs a lens and throws it to the floor, just as Andras infects Prue with rage)

Prue

(does a slow burn) Who the hell do you think you are?! (grabs a blender and smashes it on the floor)

Piper

"Sure, you can use P3 for a photo shoot." Hello? Remember me?

Prue

Oh, poor Piper! Well, you know what? The martyr routine's really getting old.

Phoebe

Hey guys, what's going on?

(to Phoebe) Shut up!

Prue

You know what? I am so sorry I didn't check with you about your stupid little club, but I was busy being the only witch concerned about the Triad.

Piper

Oh, right--without the mighty Prue Halliwell, we'd all be dead. Get over yourself, Prue.

Phoebe

Sisters, what has gotten into you two?

Prue

(to Phoebe) By the way, you owe me for a car tow and a tank of gas, you little leech!

Phoebe

I'm sorry, is it "Gang Up On Phoebe Day' and nobody told me?

Piper

News flash--the world does not revolve around Phoebe!

Prue

Yeah, so while you spend the night screwing the DA, we are stuck picking up your slack. (Andras, watching outside the window, infects Phoebe with rage)

Phoebe

What's the matter, Prue? Jealous? All work and no play making you even more boring?

Prue

Oh yeah, there's a lot to be jealous of, Phoebe. What, jealous that I'm still in school? Jealous that I'm still unemployed? And jealous that I am still living off of my sisters?

Piper

Yeah, Grams said you'd never amount to anything.

Prue

I am so sick that I have been saddled with the two of you my entire life!

Phoebe

Whatever, I'm leaving!

Piper

Oh sure--you're such an immature brat, you leave every time you can't hack something.

Phoebe

Well, there's nothing keeping me here now, is there?

Prue

Oh, well I see that you inherited Dad's talent for bailing!

Phoebe

That's because the two of us couldn't deal with living with the two of you!

Piper

Well, at least I'm not so stupid that I had to do college twice.

Phoebe

Well, at least I had the courage to go away to college. What's the matter, Piper? The real world too much for you? I am so sick of the two of you ganging up on me and judging me!

Prue

I am so sick of saving your asses!

Piper

I'm sick of being taken for granted, and those are mine! (yanks one of her earrings off Phoebe's ear)

Phoebe

Ouch! Bitch!

Prue

Pig's feet.

Piper

Yecch.

Prue

Ecch?

Piper

Yecch.

Prue

So you can slice off a chunk of demon flesh, but you can't touch a pig's foot?

Piper

I'm a vegetarian.

Prue

Since when?

Piper

Since now.

Krell

Just the thought of working with you two turns my stomachs.

Piper

Stomachs?

Prue

Listen, here's the deal. Belthazor killed the Triad, now the Source wants him dead. Krell is trying to suck up to the Source, so he wants to kill Belthazor

Piper

Belthazor wants to kill us so the Source won't kill him.

Leo

And if you work with Krell he can kill Belthazor before he kills you.

Phoebe

Works for me!

Krell

How do you witches ever get anything done?

Leo

Come on Piper, isn't this supposed to be a fun thing. You know, going back and seeing all your old friends.

Piper

You weren't by any chance popular in high school were you?

Leo

Well I was.. I mean.. Is there a right answer to this question?

Prue

Come on, why do you even care what those people think?

Piper

Only a former cheerleader could ask that question.

What kind of witch can't vanquish a demon without her sisters?

Piper

What the hell kind of demon has a panic attack everytime her boyfriend comes to visit?