Castle Season 4 quotes

Castle

Even their hypothetical fury is unnerving. William Congreve had it right when he talked about scorned women.

Beckett

Yeah well, you haven’t heard what I would do.

Castle

Yeah, I don’t think I ever want to know.

You know, you have some beautiful eyes.

Beckett

Seriously?

What? It’s a numbers game. I strike out 90% of the time.

Beckett

Thus restoring my faith in my gender.

Esposito

I don’t know what this dude Bailey was into, but whatever it was he had it going on.

Ryan

Really? This impresses you? These women are pathetic for falling for this guy and Bailey? Bailey was just a con man, and a liar.

Beckett

Thank you. At least there is one real man amongst us. Ryan, why don’t you take The Situation down to The Magic Bottle and see if we can get an ID on Lisa.

Beckett

(looking at book of victim's conquests) Oh my God. That's Jenny.

Castle

Not just Jenny. (points at page) "Gyrating Jenny".

Castle

So. What are we gonna do?

Beckett

About what?

Castle

Well we have to tell Ryan about Jenny.

Beckett

What? Why? Castle, if we were getting married would you want to know about all the guys that I’ve slept with?

Castle

All?

Beckett

Seriously? You sign women’s chests at book readings. You cannot be shocked that I’m not a virgin.

Castle

I – it’s just the word –all- suggests a lot. How many are we talking … exactly?

Beckett

Are you really asking for my number?

Castle

You show me yours, I’ll show you mine.

Beckett

(amused) Men. You all wanna know, but you don’t wanna know. Listen, every woman has her secrets, including Jenny. And sometimes, for the sake of a relationship, it is better not to share.

Castle

Officer and a gentleman. That could be the name of our crime blog.

Beckett

Crime blog? The way that you help me write police reports? Got a feeling I’ll be writing that one on my own.

Beckett

If his staff wants to minimize damage, they’ll step back and let me do my job.

Castle

Step back? These are politicians. They can’t order at a restaurant without two compromises and an ultimatum.

You're a writer, finish this sentence. "If Weldon had been run out of office..."

I'd be gone from the Twelfth Precinct.

And then who'd keep Beckett from looking into things she shouldn't? Who'd keep her out of harm's way?

So you did this to protect her? Why?

You play chess, Mr. Castle? Sometimes a well-placed pawn is more powerful than a king.

Buttons? You have a friend named Buttons? A human friend.

Alexis

Her mom called her that when she was little and it stuck.

Now, so is she.

Alexis

Buttons and I bonded over being rejected from Stanford. In fact, we applied to a lot of the same schools, so we were planning to visit a few campuses together this weekend. Make a road trip out of it.

Whoa. Okay, whoa. Where are you staying, who’s driving, and who’s chaperoning?

Alexis

We were going to take your Ferrari and hook up with some boys we met on Craigslist.

Not cool.

Her last name is Dutton? (Alexis nods.) Your friend’s name is Buttons Dutton?

Martha

That is unfortunate.

Alexis

What’s so wrong with that?

Come on, it’d be like calling me Rassle, or Tassle, or (answering his phone) No Hassle Castle. Hey... No I was just making up one... Please don’t call me that.

Hey, that’s not Jason Bateman.

Castle

That’s getting old.

Castle

We could keep him here at the precinct. I mean, we could use a mascot.

Esposito

I thought that’s what you were.

Castle

That... what’s that? What's that buddy? Esposito’s sense of humor fell down a well and can’t get out?

Castle

You think she’s wearing a wire?

Esposito

Dude, look at that outfit. Where’s she gonna put a wire?

Castle

Well, if I had to be creative, I’d guess... (noticing Kate’s look.) That’s rhetorical.

…But it made me think, all those times when you were little, how you begged me for a dog, and I refused because-

Alexis

You said you’d be the one who’d wind up having to feed it. And it was hard enough remembering to feed me every day.

Yeah… [Blinks in confusion] I don’t remember that last part.

Alexis

It was subtext. [Castle gives her a look] Barely.

Anyway, I want to make it up to you. I want to get you a dog. Only question is, what kind of dog do we get? What are we gonna name it? Whose room is it gonna sleep in?

Alexis

Whoa, Dad, slow down. I’m leaving for college soon, remember? You can’t have a dog in your dorm room.

Right. I know, I’ll just take care of him here, you can come visit him whenever you can.

Alexis

So…this dog you want to get, you know, for me? This wouldn’t be an enticement to come home from college more often, would it?

Don’t pretend like you’re smarter than me. I taught you subtext, young lady.

Alexis

Don’t worry. I’ll come back and visit so much you’ll be sick of me.

Promise?

Alexis

Yeah. Someone has to leave food out for you once in a while.

Speaking of, I’m kind of hungry right now.

Alexis

Kibbles ‘n Bits?

Peanut butter on a spoon?

Alexis

[Laughs] Chinese.

I’d like a sandwich. Welcome home.

Alexis

Yeah.

Castle

(After he reads about Joe and Vera's first meeting) The Blue Butterfly! It's a necklace! That's why Stan was killed? Why am I narrating?