Boo Jordan quotes from Bunheads

Ginny

Everybody has your number.

Michelle

Really?!

Ginny

Yep.

Michelle

Thornton Wilder should've mentioned the creepy side of small town life.

Melanie

Who?

Michelle

No one. He was in Menudo.

Ginny

Who?

Michelle

I'm gonna go be old now.

Boo

Okay, bye!

[Boo is jumping on the trash] What are you doing?

Boo

Dumpster jumping.

For, like, a contest?

Boo

No. It's part of my job.

What job?

Boo

My job.

So you're like the trash-compactor girl or something?

Boo

Waitress.

Are there customers in there?

Boo

No, just trash.

Okay, I'm sorry, I'm just trying to grasp the whole concept here. Why are you doing that?

Boo

Well, Jeff said- [Godot makes a buzzer sound]

I'm sorry. Jeff made you do that? Douche.

Boo

No, no douche.

Douchebag. Out.

Boo

But-

Get out of the trash, senorita.

Boo

But Jeff's the senior manager.

There is no senior manager or junior manager or manager. The parents aren't really into labels. Out. Relax, I'll handle Jeff- Tell him Harvard burned down and watch him cry.

Boo

He'd cry really hard.

Michelle

Please tell me this is my last class of the day.

Boo

Nope. You still have-

Michelle

Roomba! I just remembered.

Boo

It's 'Zumba.' Tomorrow's a big day too. You have Jazzercise at 9:00...

Michelle

Ugh, skinny people.

Boo

You teach the Weitzman couple their wedding dance at 10:00...

Michelle

Ugh, happy people.

Boo

Then it's a sold-out swing class.

Michelle

Ugh, people.

Boo

Fanny extended her trip. She's not coming back 'til next week.

Michelle

What? Why didn't she tell me?!

Boo

She posted it on Facebook.

Michelle

That doesn't count as telling me. Why do people think they can just share news on Facebook and automatically everyone will know?

Boo

Because everyone's on Facebook.

Boo

[the girls are drying the wet carpet with blow-driers] How long have we been doing this?

Melanie

Three hours.

Sasha

Last semester we read "No Exit." I didn't get it, but I do now.

Boo

How do we know when we're done?!

Michelle

When the carpet's dry and doesn't smell like mildew.

Melanie

What does mildew smell like?

Ginny

It smells like it sounds.

Michelle

[Showing Boo a photo of her potential blind date] I'm not going to say any more about it, just give me your thoughts.

Boo

Well, it's a car.

Michelle

It's a human.

Boo

Those aren't headlights?

Michelle

Those are eyeballs.

Boo

She's cute.

Michelle

It's a man.

Boo

Is something eating his face?

Michelle

That is happening, yeah.

[no one is talking at lunch] I swear it doesn't have to be like this.

Sasha

What, your sandwich?

No, this. Talk. Please talk. About whatever you want. I beg you.

Melanie

But we don't know basketball.

I don't care about basketball.

Ginny

Okay, fine. Let's talk. You know, I was re-watching "The Notebook" the other day, and I came up with a whole new theory.

Anything but "The Notebook."

Melanie

Well, I watched "The Vow" the other night, and I couldn't figure out why-

All Rachel McAdams movies are off the table. [Carl walks by]

Boo.

Boo

Carl. What's wrong?

I thought your lunches were an all girl thing.

Boo

They were. Sasha changed it.

Sasha

I didn't change it. Roman changed it.

[to Carl] Hey, I'm Roman.

Carl [they shake hands]. I didn't know you could just change the rules.

Boo

I didn't know you could just change them either.

Sasha

There were never rules.

Well, if there are no rules, I'm sitting here. Don't mind me. Just keep doing what you're doing.

Good luck with that. [Dez sits down next to Melanie]

Melanie

What the hell?!

Whatever. Just saw these guys here so I figured "hey."

Sasha

Impeccable logic.

Boo

I don't need to buy condoms. I'm on the pill.

Ginny

What?

Melanie

Since when?

Boo

As soon as my mother heard about Carl, she marched me down to the doctor's and put me on the pill.

Sasha

You and Carl are having sex?

Boo

What? No.

Ginny

Then why are you on the pill?

Boo

I just told you.

Melanie

I'm gobsmacked.

Ginny

What does it taste like?

Boo

I don't know. I stick it in a Peppermint Patty.

Hey, what's going on?

Sasha

Boo is on the pill.

You're having sex with Carl?

Boo

Why does everybody hear I'm on the pill and automatically think I'm having sex?

Sasha

You are absurd, Boo. You know that? Absurd.

Boo

Why?

Sasha

Because you're on the pill but not having sex. It's like having a superpower and not using it.

Sasha

This is your relationship, Boo. Don't you care?

Boo

About what?

Sasha

About the things Carl's done.

Boo

No, not really.

Sasha

But what he's done affects you.

Boo

How?

Sasha

What if you're not experienced enough, huh? That can ruin some relationships.

Boo

I'm not experienced enough. It seems to be fine so far.

Ginny

Yeah, how experienced you are doesn't matter to a lot of guys.

Sasha

What if he's got a kid?

Boo

Carl doesn't have a kid. He doesn't even have a bike.

Sasha

Boo, I think we need to step it up.

Boo

Step what up?

Sasha

I think we need to consider having sex now.

Boo

With each other?

Sasha

No, with Roman and Carl. Me with Roman, you with Carl.

Boo

But Carl and I are waiting.

Sasha

A year and a half is a long time. Time that includes dances, parties. Friday night parties that he can go to and you can't because you have class in the morning. And there's girls at these parties.

Boo

Party girls.

Sasha

That time also includes camp. Six weeks where you're apart. And he'll be a junior counselor this year. He'll wear the gray shorts. He'll be doing bed checks. He'll have privileges, power. That's a big turn-on to a lot of girls.

Boo

I know.

Sasha

Plus, in a year and a half you're not the new girlfriend anymore. You're just the old girlfriend who made him wait a year and a half. You're planning on doing it with him anyhow, so what's the difference if you just move it up a bit?

Boo

You're ready? With Roman?

Sasha

I think timing is important. We should strike while the iron is hot.

Boo

But what do we do? How do we work this? I need to shave my legs.

Ginny

How long were we asleep?