Mike[to Jesse] Saul Goodman sent me. [pause] Come on, inside. Latch the door. Where is she?
[Jesse turns his head in the direction of his bedroom. Mike puts on gloves as he walks down the hall. He then looks around and stares briefly at Jane's body before putting Jesse's drug paraphernalia inside a bag and cleaning up the room.]
Mike
Any other drugs in the house? Think hard. Your freedom depends on it. [Jesse shakes his head] What about guns? You got any guns in the house? [Jesse shakes his head again] Here's your story: You woke up. You found her. That's all you know. Say it. Say it, please. "I woke up. I found her. That's all I know." [Jesse begins to cry; Mike slaps him] Say it. "I woke up. I found her. That's all I know."
I woke up. I found her. That's all I know.
Mike
Again.
I woke up. I found her. That's all I know.
Mike
Again. Again.
[in rushing tone] I woke up. I found her. That's all I know. I woke up. I found her. That's all I know.
Mike
Once you call it in, the people who show up will be with the Office of Medical Investigations. That's primarily who you'll talk to. Police officers may arrive, they may not. Depends on how busy a morning they're having. Typically OD's are not a high priority call. There's nothing here to incriminate you, so I'd be amazed if you got placed under arrest. However, if you do, you say nothing. You tell them you just want your lawyer and you call Saul Goodman. And do I need to state the obvious? I was not here. You put on a long sleeve shirt and cover those track marks on your arm. [hands Jesse a phone] Count down from twenty and then you dial. [zips up the bag with Jesse's money] Hang tough. You're in the home stretch.
Mike
The good news is for stage three cancer, the guy's doing well. Physically. Mentally, the guy's a disaster. He's gone off the rails over this thing with his wife. My opinion: He's not coming back. Not on his own. Your friends were at his place again, by the way. They drew something on the street outside his house. The Scythe.
Animals... Does the lawyer know?
Mike
Should he?
Mike
If you want this guy to produce again, why not just tell him? You're the only thing that stands between him and an axe to the head.
I do not believe fear to be an effective motivator. I want investment. For now, I'm simply interested in time frame. He will live for the foreseeable future, yes?
Mike
Hmm, foreseeable. Couple of years at least, barring acts of God or men with axes.
[Walter is tending to Holly when he gets a late night visit from Mike]
Mike
Have a seat, Walter. I spoke to Goodman about Pinkman and this plan of yours.
Mike
I'm not gonna do it.
Mike
Because it's moronic.
Saul said you've done things like this before.
Mike
That's not the moronic part.
Okay, so what's the problem?
Mike
The problem is the boss wouldn't like it.
Mike
My boss. Your boss. This is a professional courtesy. No one knows I'm here, understand? But our employer would find out like always, and if Pinkman were arrested, he'd take it as a problem. Walt, you got a good thing going here. We all do. You want to risk it all on one junkie? Now I realize you two have a history, but this kid's been on the bubble a while now. It's a long time coming.
Mike
[chuckles] Um... I used to be a beat cop, long time ago. And I'd get called out on domestic disputes all the time, hundreds probably over the years. But there was this one guy, this one piece of shit, that I will never forget: Gordy. He looked like Bo Svenson. You remember him? Walking Tall? You don't remember?
Mike
Anyway. Big boy; 270, 280. But his wife, or whatever she was, his lady, was real small. Like a bird, wrists like little branches. Anyway, my partner and I get called out there every weekend and one of us would pull her aside and say, "C'mon, tonight's the night we press charges." And this wasn't one of those 'deep down he really loves me' setups, we got a lot of those, but not this. This girl was scared. She wasn't gonna cross him no way, no how. Nothing we could do but pass her off to the EMTs, put him in the car, drive him downtown, throw him in the drunk tank. He sleeps it off, next morning out he goes, back home. But one night, my partner's out sick and it's just me. And the call comes in and it's the usual crap. Broke her nose in the shower kind of thing. So I cuff him, put him in the car and away we go. Only that night, we're driving into town, and this sideways asshole is in my backseat humming "Danny Boy". And it just rubbed me wrong. So instead of left, I go right, out into nowhere. And I kneel him down and I put my revolver in his mouth and I told him, "This is it. This is how it ends." And he's crying, going to the bathroom all over himself, swearing to God he's gonna leave her alone, screaming–much as you can with a gun in your mouth. And I told him to be quiet, that I needed to think about what I was gonna do here. And of course he got quiet. Goes still, and real quiet, like a dog waiting for dinner scraps. And we just stood there for a while: Me acting like I'm thinking things over, and Prince Charming kneeling in the dirt with shit in his pants. After a few minutes I took the gun out of his mouth and I say; "So help me if you ever touch her again I will such and such and such and such and blah-blah-blah-blah-blah".
Mike
Hmph. Of course. Just trying to do the right thing. But two weeks later he killed her. Of course. Caved her head in with the base of a Waring blender. We got there, there was so much blood you could taste the metal. The moral of the story is, I chose a half measure when I should have gone all the way. I'll never make that mistake again. [stands up] No more half measures, Walter.
[Walter is out in the desert when a car pulls up. He hears his cell phone ringing]
Mike
Walter, you see us?
Mike
I'd like you to exit your vehicle and start walking toward us.
And then what? I'm gonna need some... some kind of assurance.
Mike
I assure you I could kill you from way over here if it makes you feel any better.
[Walt walks over to the car that has shown up. Mike gets out and approaches Walt]
Mike
Walter. You’ve been busy. You wanna put your arms out to your sides for me, if you would?
[Walt does as he’s told, standing as Mike gives him a pat-down]
Mike
You know I haven’t slept since Thursday? I was out all night cleaning up after you. I need my sleep.
You said no half measures.
Mike
Yeah? About that, it's funny how words can be so open to interpretation. Tsk. [leads Walter towards the car] You get your car fixed?
Mike
You’re gonna wanna get your car fixed.
Let’s see how this goes first.
[Gus and Victor emerge from the Suburban]
Has your condition worsened?
Your medical condition, has it grown worse?
Is there a ringing in your ears? Are you seeing bright lights or hearing voices?
I'm quite well, thank you.
No. Clearly you are not. No rational person would do as you have done. Explain yourself.
My partner was about to get himself shot. I intervened.
Some worthless junkie. For him, you intervened and put us all at risk? Some contemptible junkie who couldn't keep the peace for eight hours?
That's right, he couldn't. He was angry because those two dealers of yours had just murdered an 11-year old boy.
I heard about it. He should have let me take care of it.
Maybe. Then again maybe he thought it was you who gave the order.
[acting offended] Are you asking me if I ordered the murder of a child?
I would never ask you that.
I wouldn't know. Couple of time zones away at least. Beyond that, I'd only be guessing. He has enough money to last forever. He knows he has to keep moving. You'll never find him.
Mike
I don't know, Walt. It's what I do after all.
He's out of the picture. I saved his life, I owed him that, but now he and I are done, which is exactly what you wanted, isn't it? You've always struck me as a very pragmatic man, so if I may, I would like to review options with you, of which, it seems to me, you have two. Option A: You kill me right here and now. Apparently I have made that very easy for you. You can kill me, no witnesses, and then spend the next few weeks or months tracking down Jesse Pinkman and you kill him, too. A pointless exercise, it seems to me, but that is option A.
I continue cooking. You and I both forget about Pinkman. We forget this ever happened. We consider this a lone hiccup in an otherwise long and fruitful business arrangement. I prefer option B.
You’d need a new assistant.
[nods] I could get right on that.
[Mike is trying to get Jesse's location from Saul]
Mike
Now when I say I'm looking for Pinkman, we both know why, don't we? And you pretending otherwise only wastes my time and serves to annoy me.
Look, Mike, there are rules to this lawyer thing.
Mike
Is that right?
Yeah! Attorney-client privilege. I mean, that's a big one. That's something I provide for you. I give up Pinkman, well, then you're gonna be asking, "Ol' Saul gives 'em up pretty easy. What's to keep him from giving me up?" Y'see, so, then where's the trust?
Mike
I trust the hole in the desert I'd leave you in.
Yeah, that's... an argument.
Mike
Saul, don't make me beat you until your legs don't work. Now tell me where to find him. You know it's the right thing.
Please don't do this. Mike, you don't have to do this.
Mike
Yeah, unfortunately I do, Walter. Downstairs.
I'll cook. I'll cook for free, and there won't be anymore trouble, I promise you...
Mike
No.
...Okay, if I could just talk to Gus...
Mike
No.
...I know I could make him understand...
Mike
No. Walter...
...Please if I could talk to Gus, I could convince him, okay? Just let me please, please, PLEASE let me talk to him!
Mike
SHUT UP! Shut up. I can't do it. I'm sorry.
Look, I'll give you Jesse Pinkman, okay? Like you said, he's the problem, he's always been the problem and without him, we would... and he's in town, alright? He's not in Virginia or wherever the hell you're looking for him. He's right here in Albuquerque and I can take you to him, I'll take you right to him. What do you say?
Mike
Where is he? Right now you give me an address.
I don't know, he moves around, but if you let me call him.
[Walter reaches for his phone. Victor reaches for his gun]
No, no, please! No, it's just my phone. It's just my phone. I'll call him and I'll have him meet me, okay? Okay?
[Walter dials Jesse as Mike listens in closely]
Did you do it? Mr. White? Did you do it?
No, I didn't do it. I can't now. It's gonna have to be you.
Listen to me. You're closer than we are. You have about a 20 minute lead. They got me at the laundry and they're going to kill me...
[Mike and Victor attempt to grab the phone away]
Jesse, do it now! Do it! Do it fast! Do it, Jesse! Do it!
[Jesse grabs a gun and runs outside. Mike grabs the phone away from Walter]
[Mike and Victor point their guns at Walter]
Mike
Just what the hell was that exactly?
You might want to hold off.
Mike
Yeah? [cocks gun] Why?
Because your boss is gonna need me. 6353 Juan Tabo, apartment 6.
[Mike and Victor look at each other, shocked. They realize Jesse is heading to Gale's address.]
Mike
[without turning around to look at Walter] You might want to learn how to tail better if you plan on making a habit of it.
May I buy you a drink? Next round when you're done.
Mike
Why not? You make a hell of a lot more than I do.
[to bartender] Another round for him and I'll have the same. No ice. [to Mike] I feel like I need to explain myself. There were some actions that I took which I want you to understand. I didn't want any of this to happen. Everything I did I did out of loyalty to my partner, and then later, of course, purely out of self-defense. I hope you can appreciate that. Just like I appreciated that... [waits for bartender to walk by] I appreciated that when you were going to kill me, you were simply following orders. I get that completely. And I harbor no ill will.
Mike
[sarcastically] There's a load off my mind.
Mike, I'm trying to tell you—
Mike
I get it. Fine. Drink up, Walter.
Hell of a last couple of weeks. Makes a man wonder exactly where he stands. [Mike rolls eyes and sighs] I mean, I cannot be alone in feeling this way. Not after what happened to Victor.
Mike
So... what's with the piece? Right hip, inside your waist band. I noticed it the other day at the lab. Now you wear it if it makes you feel better, but if push comes to shove, it's not gonna help.
Mike, do I have to come right out and say this? Now you and I, we're in the same boat.
Mike
Drink your drink.
If it happened to Victor, it can happen to you. And what the hell was that anyway? A message? He cuts a man's throat just to send a message?
Mike
You won, Walter. You got the job. Do yourself a favor and learn to take yes for an answer.
Yeah, I got the job, but for how long? Get me in a room with him. Mike, just get me in a room and I'll do the rest.
Mike
You done?
[Mike punches Walter in the face and he falls to the floor. Mike kicks Walter twice as he lies there]
Mike
[putting on his jacket and stepping over Walter] Thanks for the drink.
Mike
You want to know what's next for Little Miss Pissed In His Pants?
Mike
You sure now?
Mike
Don't even want to take a wild guess?
[sniffles] You're gonna kill him. Is this the part where I'm supposed to beg you not to do it? [puts hands together] Aw, please, please. [raises voice] And then what? I'm supposed to promise, cross my heart, to, like, straighten up and fly right or toe the line or some other crap that I'm not gonna say? Is that what your little show here was all about?
Mike
You're on thin ice, you little shithead. You know that?
You ain't gonna smoke that dude in there. I know that. You know how come I know? Because you went to the trouble of putting a blindfold on him.
Mike
I'm going back to bed. Wipe the counter after you guys are done.
[Mike and Jesse bring in the body of a henchman shot by the cartel into the lab]
Mike
I wouldn't.
So, what? Is this going to be a regular thing now? Meth cooking and corpse disposal? Jesus...
Mike
Just grab us a spare barrel, Walter.
What was it this time? What did this poor bastard do to piss off Gus? Or did Gus just need to send another message?
Mike
Shut your mouth! You shut your mouth or I'll shut it for you. I don't want you talking to me or Jesse. Just get the barrel. And if you ever plan on calling the cops on one of my guys again, you go ahead and get two barrels.
[Mike learns that the police have Gus’ laptop in their possession. He starts breaking apart his cell phone after hanging up.]
Mike
Oh, yeah. We're boned. Well... You know how they say, "It's been a pleasure"? It hasn't.
Are you gonna tell us about the laptop? Where are you goin'?
Mike
I'm getting the hell outta dodge, kid. And so should you. It's just a matter of time.
Mike, where is the laptop?
Mike
What the hell difference does it make? They got it, end of story.
[Walter looks at Mike]
Mike
[scoffs] APD Northwest Area Command on Second. They tagged it, they filed it. It's in the system, and they locked it in their evidence room.
Alright. Alright, so describe the building.
Mike
[chuckles] Describe it? How about how you describe Fort Knox? And what are you going to do? Are you going to put on your black leotard and go dangling on the clothesline? It's a building full of cops, what else do you need to know? And why in the hell am I talking to you? [turns to leave]
Mike, we gotta do something.
Mike
I am doing something!
He's good with this stuff, okay? Just give him a chance.
Mike
Hey look, that laptop might as well be on the Moon. They build these evidence rooms like bank vaults, because guess what? Lunatics like you want to break into 'em. But unlike a bank vault, this is a place that is guarded twenty-four hours a day by the police. There's no way you're getting it out of there.
Who said that we have to get it out of there? We just need to destroy what's on it.
Mike
Oh, so now you want to blow up a police station?
I don't believe I said that, no.
Mike
Nursing home full of old folks just whet your appetite, now you want to kill a bunch of cops?
I never said anything about killing anybody. I am, however, considering the possibility of a device.
Mike
A device?
Yes, a small device. Say this device gets filed into evidence, now it is inside that room.
Mike
You want to commit a whole other crime just to get this bomb of yours into evidence?
Bo–Who said bomb? I said a device...
Yo, what about like a magnet?
...an incendiary device. One quick fire is all it would take.
Mike
You don't think they have fire suppression? I'm not talking about sprinklers, I'm talking about halon, because halon doesn't destroy evidence.
Right, so a bomb then. Maybe we plant a bomb outside.
Mike
Oh, actually I knew a crew out of Fort Worth that tried to blow up an evidence room from outside. 'Bout all they did was take out a couple of hedges. You are probably talking about two feet of reinforced concrete.
What magnet? What about it?
You know, it's just like... [imitates the laptop impacting on a wall]
[Walter, Jesse, and Mike drive away from the APD outpost after using an industrial magnet to wreck an evidence room.]
Mike
Shut up!
Mike
What exactly are you celebrating? You left the truck behind!
Mike
"So what?" So what if they find prints? What if they trace it back to the wrecking yard?
They won't. There's no prints. I made sure of that. There's no paperwork on the truck, the magnet, or the batteries. Untraceable salvage, all of it. I made sure of that, too.
Mike
Well, you got all the answers. So you tell me, answer man: Did all that even work just now?
Mike
I'm supposed to take that on faith, yeah? Why? How do we know?
Breaking Bad · 300 quotes
