[First lines of the series:]
Opportunities like this come once in a lifetime, and when they do you gotta grab it and turn that thing big time!
Turn it and I predict that 90 percent chance of bodily harm, and I'm talking about us, not them!
Wimp! (Puts on his helmet and runs towards the T-bar and tries to turn it.) It's stuck!
I had my pop star dream again last night and this time, I was wearing my lucky white V-neck and I was singing a Smokey Robinson song Tracks of my tears, yeah, yeah! What are we doing?
Uh, the janitor left the T-bar sprinkler valve and do you want to help us soak the girls field hockey team?
Yeah! (They both run toward it and before they turn it they look back to Logan)
I gotta get new friends. (Walks over and they all turn it. They hear the girls scream as they laugh nervously)
And now we run! (They get chased by the girls)
(While running away) This is what it's gonna be like when I'm famous! Only the girls won't be trying to kill me!
[About to get beat up by the Girl's Field Hockey team] Time Out! Carlos, give James the helmet. We gotta protect "The Face".
Right! (gives James the helmet)
Where am I and why am I freezing?!
(pointing to the fans that were there) WHAT'S UP MINNESOTA?! (they all cheer) I hate all of them. And the state for freezing my latte.
Also, I need a bigger coat.
It's our last stop so just focus and try not to make everybody cry. Somewhere in here is your new big star, I can feel it.
I'M THE STAR! What I need is a canvas with great hair that I can paint my pop on. I need a singing block of wood that I can set on fire so please tell me where in... uh..
Where in Minnesota IS MY FIRE?!
KCKendall, Carlos, Logan, James
Oww! Ouch! (they're watching The Pussycat Dolls)
Watching The Pussycat Dolls does make the pain go away.
(Seeing Nicole sing) I'm gonna marry her someday.
Uh, you're gonna marry Nicole Scherzinger... How?
CKCarlos and Kendall
No no no no no!!
(he gets up and stands on the table) I'm gonna be famous, sing to sold-out arenas, have, like, five houses, make the girls go crazy and then marry Nicole.
Are you done? Please be done.
No, 'cause this is the part where I SHAKE MY BOOTY! (He shakes his butt in front of Logan) "I'm gonna be famous, I'm gonna marry Nicole!"
Got it! (puts on his helmet and pushes James off the couch and they both fight)
TTV
Do you want to be a pop star?
TTV
Well today is your chance if you're in Minnesota!
JJenny
I'm gonna be the next Gwen Stefani!!
That's Jenny Tinkler from homeroom!
TTV
Gustavo Rocque 1990's mega-producer of bands like Boyquake, Boys In The Attic, and Boyzcity is looking for his next pop superstar. But he's even more famous for his quote of Rolling Stone he said 'I could turn a dog into a pop star.'
I sing better than a dog!
TTV
Sign-ups are until 5 pm, so if pop stardom is on your list...
TTV
You still have time..
BBoys
Mom, call me back when you get this message we need a ride real bad!
Hello? Yeah? Uh-huh. Great! Get here as fast as you can!
No but this nice lady is sending her crew over for a free estimate on aluminium siding!
Logan has a learner's permit!
What? I need an adult in the car and a car!
What are you looking at me for? Logan's the genius!
What? I panic under pressure and you always come up with the answer!
What? That is so not true... I know how to get there.
All you have to do is get in the car, Logan will drive and we'll shovel your walkway..for free! All year long!
CKCarlos, Kendall, James, Logan
Come on, come on, hurry! Faster, faster! (They are carrying Ms. Majecowsky to the car)
G1Girl 1
I'm soo in loveee with you!'
Your singing makes me want to dance...OFF OF A CLIFF! NEEXT!!
(puts headphones on) NEXT!!
G1Guy 1
:I love life more than anyone, doo doo doo
(hitting the desk) GET. OFF. THE. STAGE!
(squishes the cup so hard that the lid flies off)
(Tries to get over desk with rocket launcher )
DDog
(barks as if he was singing)
That's actually the best singing we heard all day! NEXT!
Listen here sister, that's the worst singing I've ever heard IN MY LIFE!
You know these people have feelings right?
Oh, neat. Wanna know what I have? 29 platinum records, I don't need feelings. What I need is the guy or girl the record company paid me a million dollars to find to make my fire and if you and I don't find him or her? WE'RE FIRED! (a guy comes in to sing) KEEP WALKING, DON'T STOP AT THE MICROPHONE, JUST KEEP WALKING AND GOODBYE!
Don't worry, sign ups are until five and it's..one minute till five..
Dude, how did you know those songs?
They play Boyquake on the 90's channel all day at work, and I made up the giant turd song.
What happened? The truth, now!
Mrs. Majecowsky helped us try to make James famous.
But this producer guy was super mean to everyone.
So I sang him the Giant Turd Song and there was a tiny fight, but NOBODY GOT HURT!
Okay! Who wants sandwiches?
Whoa! Wait! That's it? That's your interrogation? You didn't put the screws to 'em or slap 'em with the hard cheese!
I don't know what you're talking about, but you aren't allowed to watch FOX anymore!
Well can I at least hear the Giant Turd song?
KLKendall, Logan, Carlos, James
Oh you're such a turd, Oh yeah, a giant turd. And you look like turd, and smell like a turd... (door bell rings so they go open it but they are still singing) Oh your such a turd oh yeah a giant turd and you look like a turd and...AHH!! (they see Gustavo and Kelly standing outside their door)
YES! (he goes and hugs Gustavo) I knew you'd come back for me.
(pulls away James) I'm not here for you! I'm here for him! (points at Kendall)
CLCarlos, Logan, Kendall
What?!
(from the kitchen) I'll make some tea
So I uh, did the math last night on this whole singing thing...and, Katie was right: you're an idiot. (takes a shopping cart and pushes it, but it hits a car and its beeper goes off) It's breaking right.
Guys. I don't want to go to LA with that jerk. I want to be here with YOU jerks! And play hockey for our TEAM...
But this is just LIKE hockey! Only instead of crashing the boards and rushing the net, you're singing and dancing!
What have you got to lose?!
(walks right in front of Kendall) Dude...CALIFORNIA! The girls, the beach, the stars! The...GIRLS!
Yeah. But none of that matters if it's minus my best friends! Add those numbers up, professor.
(pulls out a calculator) Kay, carry the two, ahhhh...nope! Still an idiot.
(to James) What about you? You haven't said anything to me all day.
CLCarlos and Logan
You just did.
You know what?! (to Kendall) Dude, part of me hates you right now. No, all of me hates you. Call that guy back.
That guy said you have no talent, made YOU cry...(to Logan) and broke my mom's teacup.
Okay reality check! We have to promise ourselves NOW, that we won't let this singing thing or this town change us! We are four hockey players from Minnesota and we can never forget that! Do we all agree?
(ten minutes later, the guys are in the pool)
Once you've sipped from a real coconut, there's no going back!
Do any of your songs not have the word "girl" in them?
Well, let's find out, Mr. Question Everything I Do! Let's take a look at my WALL of PLATINUM RECORDS! (walks up to his wall) Let's see, there's uh... "Girl Like You". "Girl, You Are My Girl". "Hot Girl". "Cold Girl". (Carlos and Logan watch in dissentment) "Girl 2 My Heart". "Yard Squirrel Christmas". I forgot that one was there. Uh, "Girl Zone", "Girl Zone Remix", "Girl Cake", and "Girl Girl Girl", which sold THREE MILLION COPIES, and was NUMBER ONE...FOR FIVE...WEEKS! (walks up to Kendall) Any other questions...DOG? (slaps his cheek)
Are any of those songs from this Girllenium?
(after the boys have a pillow fight and are covered in feathers)
(to Carlos) YOU...can't sing! (to Logan) YOU...can't sing, OR dance!
(Looks at James, but skips to Kendall) Worst of all. You don't even seem to WANT this!!
What about me? I sing, dance and I want this.
YOU...remind me A LOT of Matthew McConaughey.
I CAN'T STAND MATTHEW MCCONAUGHEY!!
Tyler why are you so happy?
TTyler
Today the class takes lessons outside!
Lesson at the Palm Woods...The guys imagine the lesson out the Palm Woods School
And mine had a low student-teacher ratio.
But the problem is Mr. Masterpiece
Don't worry guys, my mom packed us corn chowder for lunch today, right? (The guys look at Kendall)
