Tetzloff, you are a lying, bottom feeding, low-life publicity whore!
PMPhil Morrison
Dr. Becker, please. Come in. Sit down. [ushers Becker into a chair]
What? No, I don't want to talk on the radio -
PMPhil Morrison
This'll be fine, seriously. Sit down. [into the radio mike] This is great. We have John Becker here, the racist doctor Mr. Tetzloff wrote about. [to Becker] Go ahead. You're on the air. Talk. Talk into the mike.
All right. This guy took a private conversation and he turned it into something that it wasn't.
Well, then maybe you could tell me what it was. You said to an Asian man, "You people can't drive."
Yes, yes. You people, as in, you lousy drivers. I didn't care where he came from. All I cared about was where he was going, which was into the side of my car! I never said he was a bad driver because he was Asian.
So you do believe Asian Americans are bad drivers?
I never said that they are bad drivers!
Oh, come on! This is stupid!
Isn't "they" just a racist code word? Another way of saying "those people?"
"They" is not a code word. "They" is a pronoun. We can't use pronouns anymore?
And by "we," you mean white Americans just like you?
Oh, come on. White Americans. Do you believe this?
PMPhil Morrison
I love this! This is like a real show!
PMPhil Morrison
Caller, you're on the air.
CCaller
Yeah, hi, Phil. Long time listener, first time caller. Guys like this doctor make me sick. Can I have a T-shirt?
PMPhil Morrison
Good point. No shirt.
This woman just proves what everything I've been saying for years, that the only thing dumber than talk radio listeners are talk radio callers. It's an entire audience made up of the infirm, the unemployed, and the insane.
So, with one sweeping generality, you smeared this man's entire audience.
PMPhil Morrison
[covers microphone] It's okay. He's right.
PMPhil Morrison
Mr. Tetzloff, in your column, you also say that Dr. Becker insulted a black man...
PMPhil Morrison
A blind man -
Hey! Hey, wait a minute. It's the same guy. You can't count him twice.
[listening with Reggie and Bob] Remind me, Reg. Why do I like him?
Come on, Becker. Just say the name of the diner. Just say the name.
And besides, he's a friend of mine. He's the only reason I go into that place - certainly not for the food.
Don't say the name. Please don't say the name.
Yes, doctor. Very clever, but what about that mean spirited swipe at Puerto Ricans?
You made a crack about people who barbecue out on the street.
Those are Puerto Ricans? You know, I didn't say that.
Yes, well, we all know that's what you meant -
No, that's not what I meant at all. I was talking about some guy who lives down the street from me. I don't know where he comes from, but he cooks his dinner on the sidewalk, and that's just stupid. You know something? You are the one who's making this about Puerto Ricans.
That's not what I did at all!
That's exactly what you did. Same thing with your column. You took a private conversation, you imbued it with racial overtones, all under the guise of political correctness. You know something? That concept was meant to make us more sensitive to each other, but instead, all you did was use it to perpetuate some ugly stereotypes!
That-that certainly wasn't my intention-
Yeah, well, that's what you did. You know, let me tell you one more thing I don't like: you. Not because of where you come from. I just don't like you. And you know something, you're free not to like me, either, as long as you do it for the right reasons. And if you don't like that, you can kiss my ass.
[Becker leaves]
PMPhil Morrison
Great show!
Becker · 252 quotes
