Beavis and Butt-Head · Season 4, Episode 32
“Liar! Liar!” · Season 4, Episode 32
In this episode: Smart Butt-head (6), Smart Beavis (6), Mr. O'Brian (4)
[counting money] fifty, sixty, sixty five-
Twelve.
Shut up. [counts in the background]
One! Twenty-five cents.
Uh, Sixty-nine.
Number two.
Eighty three, eighty four, SHUT UP.
I didn't do it! I didn't do it! It was like...some foreigner.
Hey Butt-head, what are they gonna do to us?
I think they're gonna make us take one of those polygrip tests.
Oh yeah, that stuff's cool. I found some of that at Anderson's house, and it was like, I put it on my teeth and I was walking around going [clenches teeth together] rrrghgrggrhgrhg.
Beavis, you suck as a liar.
Heh, yeah, liar. LIAR! Liar, liar, pants on-...heh! Woah.
[Butt-head is being hooked up to the lie detector tester]
Alright, now I'm gonna ask you some questions. Failure to be truthful, and your responses will be interpreted as an acknowledgment of guilt. Do you understand?
Uh... yeah. [The detector buzzes 'false'] Uh huh huh. Uh, I mean, no. [The detector dings 'true'] Huh huh huh.
Just tell the truth and you have nothing to worry about. Let's begin.
Uh huh huh huh. [takes a deep breath and holds it] Huh huh...
[Butt-head is still holding his breath, his face is red]
Okay, now. Please tell me your name.
[trying to hold his breath and talk at the same time] Butt-head...
Okay, good. Now, Butt-head, could you tell me how many fingers I am holding up?
[his face becomes even more red, yellow bubbles appearing around his head] Uhh, four? [The detector dings 'true']
Well, it's three, actually, but since you think it's four, you didn't really lie. So, that's good. [Butt-head's face turns crimson red] Now, Butt-head, tell me. In all of your life, have you ever stolen anything?
[Beavis is still in the waiting room]
I didn't do it, bunghole! Heh heh.
[The lie detector's pulse papers are moving violently, Butt-head is still holding his breath, his face is now a red hued purple, he is now on the verge of losing consciousness]
I'll repeat the question, Butt-head. Have you ever stolen anything?
Uhh... [wires start short circuiting, due to violent pulses] Uhhhh... [collapses from asphyxiation] Uh huh huh huh... [the detector lets out a flat pulse]
[Beavis is hooked up to the lie detector tester]
Good. Well, young man, I'd like to get a base reading here. Could you say something?
Uh, heh, yeah, heh.
Just say anything. The first thing that comes into your mind.
Um, heh heh, I killed a bunch of people once.
[The detector dings 'true' and Beavis takes a deep breath and holds it]
When asked how a teenage boy could have commited a crime that happened more than 2 decades ago, a police spokesman explained, quote, "He's very clever".
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Beavis and Butt-Head pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
