“N”
In this episode: Smart Butt-head (33), Smart Beavis (33), Butthead (1)
Where do these guys get these shiny pants?
Yeah, really. I went into a store once and asked for some shiny pants, and they kicked my ass out of there.
Uh...I think you like just take regular pants and you like, have them shined.
Oh really? But I do shine my pants.
You said douche.
Really? Oh yeah. I douche-ine my pants.
[During the bridge of the song] This part of the song sucks.
Yeah, really.
These guys need to just concentrate on rocking.
Yeah, really. Rock! Rock!
[Bridge of song ends] Yeah. That's more like it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah! There you go.
This guy keeps on like, stumbling around and stuff.
Yeah, it's like, I don't think he's having a very good day.
I think he's just drunk off his ass.
[Reznor presses against keyboard] Hey, get your hand off his keyboard, butthole!
Yeah. These guys need to practice more.
Yeah. They weren't very well prepared for this video.
[Farts towards the quiet end of song]
Thank you very much, we're Nine Inch Nails.
Good night!
Nirvana, Heart-Shaped Box
Yes! Nirvana rules.
Yeah, yeah, this is cool! But, um, you know, this is cool and everything, but's it's like uh, this video's been giving me nightmares, Butt-head.
Cool. I wish I had nightmares about this video.
I know Butt-head, these are pretty scary. I'ts like, I had this dream, that I'm like, Santa Claus, and I'm, like, on a cross, and there's these crows, like, picking at me. AAAHHH!!
Cool! I wish I had nightmares about this video!
Check it out. It's like he pulls his hair out of his eyes, but then it just falls back in his eyes.
So what? You got a problem with that?
Yeah.
Whoa, check it out. That room is cool. I think that's Kurt Cobain's bedroom. I'm gonna get my room set up like that with all, like, lit-up stars and stuff, and then, like, it's gonna be cool.
No you're not. You're never gonna get your room fixed up like that, and you're never gonna score.
Shut up!
You're just gonna sit around for the rest of your life, spanking your monkey.
Shut up, Butt-head! I am too gonna fix my room up! Butthole!
Nirvana, Smells Like Teen Spirit
[Upon seeing the old janitor featured in the music video] Beavis's dad!
Is this like, grudge music?
Grudge music is that stuff that guys from Seattle play. Where is Seattle? Hey Butthead, where's Seattle?
You don't know? It's that place where like stuff is really cool.
Hello, hello, hello, hello...
Hello? Hello? Hello, may I help you?
Nitzer Ebb, Fun to Be Had
Hi. I'm your tour guide. Welcome to Wuss Gardens.
It was here that George Washington first chopped off his wiener. And then he lied.
An anchor!
[mocking their accents] Like an ankaa.
Like an ankaa!
An ankaa.
It's pronounced anchor! Anchor! Can you say that? Err! Err! Dumbass. Ank-err!
What you say should be from your own mind...
What you say should be from your own mind? That's stupid.
Yeah really, because like, sometimes I can't hear all those voices in my mind, you know, and...wait a minute, Butt-head, I'm getting something. Mm-hm? Yeah? Butt-head, I have to go to the bathroom. I'll be right back. [exits, jabbers in Cornholio-style gibberish]
Hey Beavis! Come here! This sucks!
Hang on a second, I'll be right out! [jabbers in Cornholio-style gibberish]
Mojo Nixon, Elvis is Everywhere
Uh oh. I think it's one of those TV preachers.
Dammit Beavis, you'd better not send him all our money again.
Sometimes I can't help myself. It's like, I start going "I know that's right. Hallelujah." And then I'm on the phone, and I'm like, "Yeah, yeah, here's all my money!"
Yeah, but it's like, you send him all your money and you're still just a dumbass with a lot of problems.
Hey, you're right. [angry] Dammit! I got ripped off!
Elvis is in your jeans!
Elvis is in our jeans?
Hey Butt-head, check this out...Elvis has left my jeans!
Dammit Beavis, if you pull your pants down one more time I'm gonna beat the crap outta you!
[impersonating Elvis] Thank you very much.
Hey Beavis, while you were fiddling with your wiener, I think he said that Elvis is like, in Joan Rivers.
Whoa, really? That'd be cool. [impersonating Joan Rivers] Can we talk? I've got Elvis inside me!
Beavis, that doesn't sound anything like her.
Oh. [impersonating Elvis] Thank you very much.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Beavis and Butt-Head pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
