Batman: The Animated Series · Season 1
[Batman has cornered Jervis Tetch, who just subdued Alice with her mindcontrol card and is at a dinner table with him]
I'll cut that cowl off your neck before you'll take her! I've waited my whole lonely life for her!
Then all you've waited for is a puppet. A soulless little doll.
It didn't have to be this way! You made me do this to her!
"There's always time to heal", the doctor told me, but he was wrong. There was no time left. Not for me, not for him, and not for Gotham City. And as long as I remained trapped in Arkham, there was nothing I could do, except wait for the end and remember the beginning.
An entire city, screaming in fear... I wonder if we'll be able to hear it...
You wicked, evil-
Evil, Mrs. Thomas? I don't control a company that leveled a thousand-year-old forest for a strip mine! THAT'S evil! [sprays a gas which causes Mrs. Thomas to become petrified; steals a pair of earrings] You and your kind owe Mother Nature a big debt, and I am here to make sure you pay up.
Right now, the bark is merely exoskeletal. It will take months of additional spraying before the transformations become irreversible. But, of course, I have the patience of a redwood.
And the convictions of a fanatic.
Well, if you're not going to be part of the solution, you're obviously part of the problem. Ladies? [Ivy's henchwomen begin to spray Batman with the growth formula] This spray is triple-strength, Batman. It will start the transformation without any preliminaries. [Nothing seems to happen to Batman as he unties his hands] He should be sprouting leaves by now.
[Unties his hands and stands up, blocking the spray with his cape as he advances] You made your secret too accessible, Ivy! I coated my outfit with a herbicidal antidote!
Keep spraying! [Violet and Lily back away, still spraying, but Batman subdues them both]
You're not well, Mr. Wayne. You need professional help.
LIAR! You knew what's going on! This is a dream, and you're the one responsible!
A dream? Why do you think that?
I suspected it from the start! I knew I was right when I tried to read the newspaper. The print didn't make sense.
Yes...?
That's because reading is a function of the right side of the brain. While dreams come from the left side. It's impossible to read something in a dream!
Granting that's true, how is it my fault?
I can't explain it. But you're the key to this. I knew you'd be here. This tower is part of my nightly patrol. Now, tell me what's going on!
[Looking down off the ledge, preparing to jump] You're wrong! There IS a way out!
Now, now wait just a minute! You don't want to do anything foolish! This isn't an ordinary dream! What if you're wrong?!
THEN I'LL SEE YOU IN YOUR NIGHTMARES!
WHY? Why did you do it?!
You, of all people, have the GALL to ask me that? You RUINED MY LIFE! I was willing to give you WHATEVER life you wanted, JUST TO KEEP YOU OUT OF MINE!
Look up "slippery" in the dictionary and you get Josiah Wormwood.
[About the Bat-Signal] Got a new toy, I see.
I figured it might come in handy.
[Robin and Batman are doing a stakeout]
If I knew it was going to take THIS long, I would've brought my homework. You sure about this extortion ring?
[Looking at the construction site through binoculars] Uh-huh.
It's been four hours.
Uh-huh.
You still think they'll show?
Uh-huh.
Lucky for me, you're such a good conversationalist.
If you protect him, Stromwell, I'll be very... GRUMPY. You don't want to see me when I'm grumpy.
I'm not back in town five minutes - FIVE MINUTES - and he's on my tail. You don't know the Bat. He don't let up! He's the dark angel of death, man, and he wants ME!
Why you, boss?
HOW SHOULD I KNOW?!
[Robin is about to throw Tony Zucco off the pier]
No, don't! Please...
Robin! Enough. You can't let your emotions get the best of you.
Stuff your advice, Batman! You and your stone-cold heart! You don't know how I feel. HOW COULD YOU?!? [Batman looks at him, and Robin realizes what he said] Batman, I didn't mean to... I'm sorry. [after he sees the police coming, Robin seemingly readies to throw Zucco off the pier but simply throws him to the ground. The cops arrive and arrest Zucco.] You were right, you know, not bringing me along. You knew I'd take it too personally.
It wasn't that, Robin. It wasn't that at all. Zucco's taken so much, caused you so much pain. I couldn't stand the thought that he might... take you, too.
Come on, partner. It's been a long night.
[seeing Batman with a Joker Fish] Dining in tonight, sir?
[sighs] The dissection tray, please, Alfred...
Any idea what our happy friend is up to now?
Normal criminals usually have logical motives, but the Joker's insane schemes make sense to him alone.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Batman: The Animated Series pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
