TV show quotes
I will be so glad when Trevor gets back from sergeant school.
Speaking of school, what's up with our little genius?
I'm in the application process to three private schools. It's a friggin' nightmare. "Tell us about your child". How am I supposed to answer that? Erm, he eats dog biscuits, sleeps in a Batman costume and has a higher IQ than both of his parents combined.
I thought talking about Delta was like double-secret-probation or something.
I've been looking over the promotions list. How does "Lieutenant Colonel Sherwood" sound?
Well, to be honest, sir, it sounds a little fancy for a mutt like me.
Well, get used to it. It's being announced next week.
Thank you, sir.
You've earned it. As it happens, my G-3 is also on that list. He's headed to Fort Carson as a full-bird which leaves me with a problem and I was hoping you could help me solve.
Sir?
I'd like you to be my new G-3. I know how much you like being in the field but you're almost at the end of your third tour and my thinking is––
I accept.
[looks at Frank strangely] You don't even want to think it over?
[without hesitation] No need, sir.
Welcome aboard, Colonel.
Thank you, sir.
[Joan is playing with Sara Elizabeth]
[squeals] Roland! Did you hear that?!
Hear what?
She said Mama!
It doesn't count unless she repeats it.
[to Sara Elizabeth] Mama, mama. Come on, baby girl, say Mama!
[amused] Ok...
[after finding her wallet] Ah! My wallet! Yes! I'm alive!
Is Joan with you?
Um, no. Things are a bit frosty at the moment.
You talking about snow flurries or arctic tundra?
[walks over] Hey, what are y'all celebrating?
[points to Trevor] This man just made Sergeant.
[flirtatiously] Ooooh. Well, does the sergeant speak for himself? [reaches hand out] Hi, I'm Lindsay. What's your name?
[shakes hand] I'm Trevor.
Tell me more, Sergeant Trevor, I'm very interested.
[cuts in while Trevor drinks from his bottle, smiles at Lindsay] He's very married! [jokingly to Trevor] You're in big trouble, Mister!
[Trevor laughs and follows her out]
[to Lindsay] Hey, I'm not married.
Oh yeah? What are you?
Private First Class Brian Day, at your service.
Private? [scoffs] As if!
[Sailors sitting behind PFC Day laugh]
Guess the lady knows dog meat when she smells it.
[A fight breaks out between PFC Day and the sailors. Trevor and his friends drag PFC Day out through the back door.]
[in amazement] The Hump is officially banned!
How do you do it?
Do what?
Organize everything and still manage to look so damn beautiful.
[Pamela catches Katie looking at herself in the mirror.]
Whatcha doin?
I'm fat.
[surprised] What?
I'm a fat cow!
Katie! Stop it! You are not!
You have to say that. You're my mom!
What I see is a young lady who is healthy and strong and looks great just the way she is. Now get dressed and come downstairs for breakfast.
I'm not hungry.
You have to eat. Breakfast is the most important meal of the day.
[retorts] If it's so important why do you just drink coffee in the morning?
[at a loss for words] ....because mommies are all grown up and they can do what they want.
Michael, I am so sorry but what could we do? She's a nut!
Yeah. Faulty intell. I thought she was just a doddering old lady. Turns out she's the merry widow.
She needs armed escort, not us.
Just get her to that ceremony tomorrow and she'll be out of our hairs. [turns to walk back to his office]
[glumly] Easy for you to say.
[smiles] That's why I'm the general.
[confronts PFC Day who is mopping the floor as punishment and angrily kicks his bucket] What's going on with you?
Nothin'.
Nothing? You're pulling extra duty for missing formation. You've been insubordinate. And what about last night, huh? Letting those squids get underneath your skin? Throwing the first punch?! [sarcastically] Right. Nothing's going on.
So what? I'm not some hotshot soldier like you.
Are you deliberately trying to sabotage your career? Because if you are, you're doing a hell of a job!
What do you know about it, huh?! You don't know nothing about me!
So tell me.
Forget it. Guys like you had it easy your whole life. You don't understand. You don't understand how–– [goes back to mopping the floor] Forget it.
[Trevor smirks as he turns to leave]
Did I say something funny?!
Don't understand, huh? My mom died when I was three. The next day in between beers my father dropped me off with social workers. And I was in and out of foster homes till I was seven.
I'd kick my old man's ass for that.
Yeah, I didn't have the chance. He's in prison doing life for murder.
Your mother's gone only a few hours and our eating habits have gone completely to hell.
How do you spell "Holden"?
H-O-L-D-E-N.
I was asking Mom. [turns to Roxy] Mom!
He's right.
See?
[mutters] Know-it-all.
I played the clarinet. It sounds like a goose.
Mom, are we poor?
[looks up in surprise] What? Where did you get that idea?
Byron's got a trampoline, a swimming pool and a wooden fort bigger than the one at school
He does?
He even has a computer and a TV in his room.
Wow. That's a lot of stuff
Yeah.
But you know, stuff doesn't really make a person rich or poor.
It doesn't?
Heck no. I mean, we may not have a lot of stuff but we've got plenty of things that other people don't have.
Like Lucky?
[smiles] Yeah. Like Lucky. But also, like a roof over our heads and clothes on our back and food in our bellies. A lot of people don't even have that.
They don't?
No. But more importantly we have each other, right? Like your dad and TJ and all of our friends.
So we're not poor.
Do you feel poor?
[thinks] No. But I wish we had a pool.
Yeah, well, me too. Come here. [gives Finn a hug]
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Army Wives pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
