[After "Dance of the Sugarplum Fairy Op. 71 a Andante ma non troppo" from "The Nutcracker Suite" leaves both Slappy and Skippy dazed...]
Hold it! Stop the music there! [the music stops] What's with the sappy music and the dancing? I don't do pathos and I can't dance, don't ask me. [to Charlton Woodchuck] Wait a minute. You look familiar. Unappealing, but familiar.
Aunt Slappy, that's the director, Charlton Woodchuck.
BAYNARTS! [slaps him on the back] What're you doin' here, you ol' son of a hack?
CCharlton
It's "Charlton". It's written in my contract that when I was old enough, I would get to direct.
Yeah, Skippy has the same deal.
[dressed like Steven Spielberg] Love you, babe, but we're losing our light.
[taps the script] What's with six minutes of opening a walnut?
CCharlton
Don't you see? It's a parable about man against nature. The nut represents the struggle to achieve our goals.
[tears up the script] There! My goal is achieved!
CCharlton
[sighs] Let me put it this way, Sloppy.
CCharlton
That's "Charlton". Either you do this script, or you don't get paid.
[Slappy goes nose to nose with Charlton, glaring...then grins winningly, complete with cash register sound]
[At the end of the cartoon, after finally getting the shell to open...]
Hey, von Stroheim! There's no nut inside this shell!
CCharlton
Yes, exactly, it's the emptiness of our existence! That's symbolism, that's metaphor!
Yeah, but that's not comedy! [stuffs Charlton into the nutshell] Now there's a nut inside!
You're adorable, but that's my line!
This is the city: Los Angeles, California. On a starlit winter's night, when the moon was shining bright...Back in January of 1994, at 4:30 in the morning, and without a single warning, something strange began to move the floor. A quake! a quake! The house begins to shake! You're bouncing 'cross the floor and watching all your dishes break. You're sleeping, there's a quake, you're instantly awake. You're leaping out of bed and shouting.
I ran outside with neighbors, their faces filled with shock. That's because I'm standing there In nothing but my socks. Oh, a quake, a quake.
Say, it's all a big mistake!
Just feel the ground go up and down!
Won't someone hit the brake? A quake, a quake, oh, what a mess they make! The bricks, the walls, the chimney falls, destruction in its wake!
I did not have insurance, so I called them from the scene And suddenly I'm listening to an answering machine, saying:
Too late! Too late! You shouldn't ought-a wait! So now you're stuck, we wish you luck! Here comes a 6.8! Whose fault? Whose fault? The San Andreas' fault, cause Mr. Richter can't predict her kicking our asphalt! Seismologists all say tectonic plates are in between an encroaching crustal mantle.
WDWakko and Dot
Yeah, so what the heck's that mean?
It means a quake! A quake!
WDWakko and Dot
Oh, really, yeah, no fake? We kinda had that feeling When the ground began to shake!
California's great! It's such a lovely state! 'Cause every lawn is sitting on a continental plate! Los Angeles had fires and a riot and a flood and then a drought and a recession and then now we hear this thud of a quake, a quake!
How much more can we take?!
We thought that we had seen it all...
But this one takes the cake! The dirt,
And all those aftershocks!
It's just the planet moving granite several city blocks! [to the tune of London Bridge] LA town is falling down while the ground moves around! We won't let it get us down, we're Californians!
It's time to pull up stake.
We're all fed up, we can't deny it!
Fires, quakes, and floods, and riot!
We want someplace with peace and quiet. So we're moving to Beirut!
