Mr. World quotes from American Gods

Media

Wouldn't you like an upgrade? A brand new, lemon-scented you?

Oh I'm a fine me. I just keep getting better every year.

Of course you are, and that is the you that deserves to be seen incorporated. Everyone in the world gets their place.

With you?

That's why they call me Mr. World.

And if they disagree?

I get it. I do. [chuckling] You're an individualist. Rugged individualism. It simply doesn't work anymore. Brands. Sure. A useful heuristic. But ultimately, everything is all systems interlaced, a single product manufactured by a single company for a single global market. Spicy, medium, or chunky. They get a choice, of course. Of course! But they are buying salsa.

An oyster. Inside every pearl there's a single irritating grain of sand. That's me. Otherwise, you wouldn't be here. Just like an oyster, you're trying to cover me up with something smooth and shiny. Pretty on a necklace, but inside the shell, that slimy thing just wants that scratchy thing out of there. You say merger? I hear exile.

Media

It's not our fault they found other ways to occupy their time.

That's all you do, occupy their time. We gave back. We gave them meaning.

Then give it to them again.

People create gods when they wonder why things happen. Do you know why things happen? Because gods make them happen. You wanna know how to make good things happen? Be good to your god. You give a little, you get a little. The simplicity of that bargain has always been appealing. That's why we're here, and that's precisely why I matter.

You only matter in matters of war. And there's not going to be a war. We have the guns. We have the firepower. You have the swords and knives and hammers and stone axes. We fight, we win. We don't fight, we win.

Technical Boy

You die out either way.

You are the passenger pigeons and thylacines. Nobody cares about you. It's either going to be a bloodbath, or we'll wait you out and get the whole thing without a fuss. My message to you: don't fight.