ALF?
Yes?
Come here.
No problem. Kate, I'm sorry about your flowers. Please accept these along with my apologies.
They smell like feet.
I washed them in Desenex.
ALF, where is our football?
Behind your back.
[shows ALF the football] Raquel said it broke her window.
That's ridiculous! Footballs don't break windows, people do.
What about aliens?
Me, I broke nothing, I swear.
You broke those plates when you throw the football through my kitchen window.
Oh, like that's relevant.
ALF, how did this football get into the Ochmoneks' backyard?
Well, I have a theory.
Please share it.
Alright. See, I was standing near the fence. I kicked the football, it went up but it never came back down.
So what's your theory?
Well, isn't it obvious? Gravity failure. Explanation 2, what happened-
[interrupts ALF and comes to the living room] What did ALF do this time?
Nothing.
Somebody broke the Ochmoneks' window and we're trying to figure out who it was.
Say, it wasn't you, was it Brian?
No.
Brian dear, this is very important!
Hey, if the kid said he didn't do it, he didn't do it. Stop with the 3rd degree.
Fine. If he didn't do it, that makes you the prime suspect.
Brian dear, this is very important. Did you break the window?
No.
Huh? Who could it have been?
Alright, that's it. You're not watching TV for 1 month.
Why, what did I do? You can't punish me without just cause. I demand a trial.
There's no need for a trial, forget the trial.
So you do think I'm guilty. You're punishing an innocent alien.
Yeah, dad, my teacher said everyone's innocent until proven guilty.
Okay, fine. ALF gets his trial. I'll be the judge.
Oh, no offense, Willie, but I prefer a fair trial.
What you trust mom to be the judge?
Without hesitation.
I'm not gonna be the judge, and there's not gonna be a trial.
Look, I know my rights. I want my day in court and that's that! If I'm found guilty, I'll take the month with no TV.
Okay, we'll have a trial tomorrow morning after breakfast.
Fine, whatever you say, your honor. I respect your judgment and I'm not just saying that.
Stop kissing up.
I'm not kissing up. I'm innocent. Why should I have to kiss up? By the way, I love what you've done with your hair.
[angrily] STOP IT!
I'm stopped. It's stopped. You're right. You're brilliant. She's brilliant. She's really is. She's brilliant. No more kissing up. Not if she doesn't want me to kiss up. I wouldn't kiss up to the judge. Nuh-uh. [goes to the kitchen]
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