[seeing them push all the buttons in the elevator] What are you doing, Baudelaires? If we stop on every floor, I'll never reach the roof in time to poison everyone!
That's brilliant! If we stop on every floor, we can warn everyone!
And save all these people.
Only the ones who will believe you.
[the elevator stops at the lobby]
The hotel is on fire!
Fire? Olaf, you're finally thinking big.
There's no fire. The Baudelaires are trying to trick you! Whatever you do, stay where you are!
We're not lying! Can't you smell the smoke?
That's from the barbecue for the cocktail party!
Typical Olaf. Throwing a party instead of starting a fire.
And after we tried so hard to set a bad example.
You have disappointed us for the last time.
I certainly have.
[immaturely as elevator door closes] You're a disgrace to the legal profession!
[the elevator stops on another floor]
Fire! Fire!
Argh! Klaus? You shouldn't add false reporting to your list of crimes.
Next, they'll be saying Count Olaf is here!
Count Olaf is here! There really is a fire! You have to leave!
Follow me. I'm such a genius, I'll find the exit blindfolded.
It's like the blind leading the blind. [grabs an elephant statue] I've got you, sir.
[the elevator stops on another floor]
Fire!
Fire? Oh, no! No, no, no!
I think the stairs are this way!
I think the stairs are that way!
I don't like to argue. Let's compromise and just stand here.
[the elevator stops on another floor]
Esmé, Carmelita, the hotel is on fire. You have to get out!
Why should we listen to cakesniffers?
She's right. You orphans are as dishonest as my ex-boyfriend.
[knowing what will happen] No, seriously, it's a big fire. I swear. Also, the sugar bowl is definitely not down in the laundry room.
He's lying. We'll take the stairs to the laundry room and grab it ourselves! At last, the sugar bowl is mine!
More from this episode
All quotes from this episode →More A Series of Unfortunate Events quotes · These quotes come from Wikiquote's A Series of Unfortunate Events pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.







