[to Gaz] There is to be no dumping. I just think you've got a nice body and I'd like to bounce around on top of it occasionally. None of this boyfriendy girlfriendy stuff.
Don't be late, I'm making take-away for tea!
I'm laying down the seeds for my reign of power over Donna. See, the more I don't phone her the more desperate and insecure she becomes, soon she will surrender to my constant demand for sexual gratification.
(In the pub, holding a steak and kidney pie) Who invented the pie? I mean what a genius. 'Cause you've got the subtle flavour of the steak, mixed with the texture of the finest kidney, and all that against the magnificent backdrop of the crumbly buttery pastry. If that man was here now I'd shake his hand.
I'd kiss him.
You big poof!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.