Damon Salvatore quotes from The Vampire Diaries

Elena

So, why did you bring me with you?

Damon

Well you're not the worst company in the world, Elena. You should give yourself more credit.

Elena

Seriously?

Damon

You know...you were there in the road, all 'damsel in distress'-like. And I knew it'd piss off Stefan. And...you're not the worst company in the world, Elena.

Elena

I used to be more fun.

Damon

You did okay.

Elena

I saved your life.

Damon

I know.

Elena

And don't you forget it.

Bonnie

You tried to kill me.

Damon

But I didn't. And if I wanted to, I would have. Does that not count for anything?

Damon

Elena, would you like to dance?

Elena

I would love to. (to Stefan) May I have this dance?

Elena

(Sighs) Good morning.

Stefan

I could get used to this...

Damon

Rise and shine, sleepyheads!

Stefan

What are you doing?!

Elena

Damon, please!

Damon

Oh, stop being smutty.

Stefan

Seriously, get out of here!

Damon

If I see something I haven't seen before, I'll throw a dollar at it.

Damon

Is she hot?

Jeremy

Yeah, but she can be weird.

Damon

Hot trumps weird. Trust me.

Jenna

[Talking with Elena in kitchen about Damon] He is ridiculously hot.

Elena

Shh! He's an ass.

Stefan

Anna took Elena.

Damon

Yeah, I got that from your 600 voice mails.

Stefan

What if your blood hasn't passed out of her system?

Damon

Well, I guess you will see her again.

Stefan

Please, what do you know? You were with Anna - you must know where she's living. Just tell me where I can find her.

Damon

No. You can go now.

You got some nerve knocking on a Bennett witch's door and asking her for anything.

Damon

What'd I do?

Spirits talk, Mr. Salvatore, and so does my granddaughter. You are no friend to us. Now get off my porch.

Damon

Step outside and say that.

[Stares hard at Damon]

Damon

[Suddenly groans in pain and clutches his head]

I am not Bonnie. You don't wanna mess with me.

Damon

Stefan will come after you, you know that. For messing with Elena.

Anna

Then he won't be too happy if I kill her when I don't get what I want. [Begins to walk away]

Damon

[Sighs] When do you want to do this?

Anna

[Laughs] God, it's like 1864 all over again. You Salvatores are truly pathetic when it comes to women.

Damon

Fool me once, shame on you.

Elena

Okay, when we were in Atlanta, why didn't you use your compulsion on me?

Damon

Who says I didn't?

Elena

You didn't. I know you didn't. But you could have. You and I...we have something. An understanding. And I know that my betrayal hurt you, different than when it comes from Stefan, but I'm promising you now that I will help you get Katherine back.

Damon

I wish I could believe you.

Elena

[Removes her vervain necklace] Ask me if I'm lying now.

Damon

[Placing her necklace back] I didn't compel you in Atlanta because we were having fun. I wanted it to be real. [Pause] I'm trusting you. Don't make me regret it.

Damon

She's not here!

Stefan

Damon-

Damon

She's not here.

Stefan

What?

Damon

SHE'S NOT HERE!

Elena

Stefan, they can't hold it much longer!

Stefan

Damon, we need to get out of here.

Damon

It doesn't make sense, they locked her inside...

Stefan

If we don't leave now, we're not getting out.

Damon

How could she not be in here?

Stefan

It's not worth spending all of eternity down here! She's not worth it!

Damon

No!

Elena

Damon!

Damon

[Looks at her]

Elena

Please.

Anna

You wouldn't have helped me.

Damon

[Rushes at Pearl; grabs her by the throat]

Anna

No!

Damon

Why do you get a happy ending?

Anna

Damon, please! You wouldn't have helped me! You know you wouldn't!

Damon

Why do you get it and I don't?

Pearl

The guard. The one at the church - the one who locked us in. She promised to turn him. He was obsessed with her.

Damon

[Tightens his grip]

Anna

No-

Pearl

[Choking] She had him under her spell...like everybody else. He let her go.

Damon

[Releases Pearl]

Anna

The last I saw her...was Chicago. 1983. She knew where you were, Damon. She didn't care. [Whispers] Sorry.

Damon

What exactly are you trying to achieve?

Pearl

Mystic Falls is our home, Damon. They took that from us. Our land, our home. It's time we rebuild.

Damon

What, are you crazy? It was 1864. Wake up, woman. The world has moved on.

Jenna

Don't be grumpy. It can't be that bad.

Damon

You'd be surprised. My primary reason for existence has abandoned me, and after today's events, the remains of the shaky ground that I walk on are about to go 'kaboom.' (turns to Kelly) Let's get hammered.