[After Ren takes Stimpy to "someplace where [he] won't hurt [himself] any longer", [i.e., their house's basement] he has a nightmare about Muddy Mudskipper and TV]
SStimpy
Hey, Muddy, what are you going to do with that mallet? Muddy, I'm your friend!
AH-HA! [hits Stimpy with the mallet, hard, resulting in a cranial eruption, with Stimpy groaning in pain] Give the bum a big hand! [audience laughs]
SStimpy
[tossing and turning] What are you?
SStimpy
But Muddy, I love you!
A lousy, stinking BUM! [Stimpy tossing and turning again. He turns into a TV set] You're a BUM, BUM, BUM, BUM, BUM, BUM, BUM, BUM, BUM, BUM, BUM, BUM, BUM!
SStimpy
[falls helplessly into Muddy's mouth, followed by Muddy chomping his mouth shut. He wakes up from his nightmare] MUDDY! [runs up a winding staircase to the attic, which has a barred window] Lord, help me. [begins to cry] I WANT MY TV! [Ren doesn't hear him and he's fallen asleep]
SStimpy
Yes it is, Ren! Beef carcasses are very lucky you know, once we immerse it in common house o-bile!
WHAT?! THAT MEAT GOES IN MY MOUTH, NOT IN YOUR BILE!
SStimpy
[stammers] But... but, Ren...Tuesday...17!
[Ren punches Stimpy to the ground and proceeds to lift up the beef carcass and, with a grunt, tosses it back in the house through the window, where it lands on their bed]
SStimpy
NO! You've done it now, Ren! It's TERRIBLE bad luck to toss your carcass on the bed!
I wave my shiny red keister in the face of you and your stuper-stitions!
SStimpy
[horrified] No, Ren! It's bad juju to blaspheme!
[evilly] Juju, eh? Ooh, I'm so scared! The big bad juju's gonna get me. COME ON, JUJU! I'M CALLING YOU OUT! [gets struck by lightning] Ow, ow, ow, ow...
SStimpy
Gee, Ren, I guess you didn't know it was unlucky to-
SStimpy
[scared] Yes, sir! [runs back into the house]
RSRen's Anger
Oh no! The Hermit Union Leader!
JJasper
Alright, this is a bust! YOU! [points to Ren] You broken the cardinal rule of Hermitude. Companionship. And what's with all these imaginary friends! You're violating the law. EXPOSED! YOU are officially kicked out of the Hermit Union! [Fades to outside, Jasper ripped his beard off Ren. Jasper salutes Ren, Ren carrying mud Stimpy and walking to home. Jasper salutes, Ren's anger, fear and Ignorance salutes as well, Mummified Bog Man salutes too, Oldman Farmer Hoek salutes and Salesman salutes too and even bats salutes as well. Fades to Cowhouse, Ren looks at Cowhouse and he opens it]
SStimpy
Giddyup, horsey! Giddyup! [Ren looks at Stimpy dressed up as a lady with Mud Ren] Ren! You're back! [smiles]
So, I turned my back for 10 years and you found yourself another chihuahua! [Stimpy was sad and gets an idea]
SStimpy
Ahem! But, Ren. [Ren looks at Mud Stimpy]
Oh. [chuckles] Sure. Well, it's great to be back, BUDDY! [Ren hugs Stimpy, Mud Ren and Mud Stimpy was winking at the viewers smiley and hugs together. The two iris was closing completely at the end of the episode]
[Ren is discussing with Stimpy about Sid]
Okay, one more time, if you let the little monster come near me again, I'll...
SStimpy
Uh... Oh yeah! Kill me slow.
SStimpy
Take my show away from me?
SSid
[looks at Ren's butt] Hmm, smooth butt. I heard of that.
And... [Sid bites Ren's butt, making him scream in pain]
SStimpy
Oh good! He's teething!
[comes home to find out that Stimpy and Sid have made a mess of the house] THAT'S IT! I've had enough of you and your stupid pet! THERE'S TOOTHPASTE ALL OVER THE HOUSE! THE TOILET SEAT IS ALWAYS UP! AND HAVE YOU SEEN THE PRICE OF CLOWN PANTS NOWADAYS?! AND PLAYING WITH MY STUFF IS STRICTLY VERBOTEN!
[Upon hearing Ren say "verboten", Sid roars viciously and precedes to maul Ren as he screams]
SStimpy
Now, Ren, you should refrain from using any Slavic dialects. Sid is a German attack clown.
[last lines in the series]
Don't worry, Stimpy! I'll save you... [Ren looks a motorcycle, two roller skates, a red car with a lady standing next to it and looks back at Stimpy, who is still choking. He dreams of riding around in the red car] I'll, uh, go or help! [runs to Wilbur Cobb, who picks him up by the neck]
WCWilbur Cobb
So, back to your ol' tricks, EH JOHNNY?!? Are you gonna let your friend Snoopy choke? Are you gonna do the right thing? [Ren punches Stimpy and spits the leg of ham out of his mouth] Good work, Skippy! And as a reward, you get the spend the next 15 years with your stupid friend there. [Wilbur Cobb slams his rake on Ren's head] Of course, there's the matter of all these worldly goods and seeing as they were all bought with ill gotten gains, I'll have to take everything as evidence, goodbye. [drives off with all their stuff and a lady. Ren and Stimpy start crying]
[Iris out, ending the series]
[Stimpy is having a nightmare over accidentally stealing a scooter]
OWOld Woman
That's him! Stealing scooters on Yaksmas! SHAME ON YOU!
SYShaven Yak
I stayed up for a week chewing all that gum for you!
I'm glad I forgot to get you that stupid scooter! You don't deserve it!
CCop
I was gonna buy that scooter for my sick little kid! And now look at her!
[Enter the cop's daughter, who is in the form of a demented marionette]
MMarionette
[laughs insanely] Now look at me! Now look at me! NOW LOOK AT ME! [laughs insanely]
SStimpy
I can explain! I-
[Stimpy gets slammed by a very large gavel, which belongs to the judge, Stinky Whizzleteats]
SStinky
Stimpson J. Cat, you stand accused of stealing a $39 scooter. How do you plead?
SStimpy
Listen your honor, I- [his tongue reveals the words "guilty as sin" printed on it; he exclaims in shock]
SStinky
Foreman Yak, how do you find the thieving rat?
[We see the jury, which consists of twelve yaks, with their stand titling them as "12 Angry Yaks". One of the yaks, the foreman yak, stands up, and speaks]
FYForeman Yak
Guilty, of scootercide in the first degree.
SStinky
Very well. [points at Stimpy] For your crimes against humanity, your sentence is INFINITY IN PRISON! [echoing]
SStimpy
[begins to cry after he gets locked in a jail cell] BUT I DIDN'T MEAN TO TAKE IT!
The Ren & Stimpy Show · 56 quotes