The O.C. quotes

Taylor

This cannot be happening. [to a bookstore worker] Excuse me, uh, what is this book?

A Season for Peaches. It's the bestseller from France. English translation came in today.

Taylor

Okay, what's it about?

Kind of, like, Bridges of Madison County meets The Notebook meets... porn.

Taylor

Oh, my God. Plot, please.

Uh, this Frenchman seduces this young American girl and then they get married... I can't remember where.

Taylor

His family's chapel in Burgundy.

Oh, so you read it.

Taylor

No, I lived it. I'm Peaches.

Taylor

Excuse me, the girl just has a healthy sex drive.

Summer

Yeah, for a hooker.

Ryan

Met your ex-husband last night. He was at the bookstore, doing a reading.

Taylor

Wait, you met Henri-Michel? How did you know it was him?

Ryan

Dirty hair? Scarf? Smells like brie?

Taylor

That's Henri-Michel.

Taylor

Okay, Ryan. Even if I was that limber, you know I would never do that in the Chunnel.

I've gotta go. There's a man who's been impaled by what appears to be a unicorn.

Seth

[whispering in amazement] Unicorns.

But our conversation is going to continue. We'll talk about this on my rounds tomorrow. [leaves]

Seth

So does this mean I have your blessing? [door closes] They do exist.

Summer

[talking about Che] He's flying here. He was feeling weird Seth vibes.

Taylor

All the way from Rhode Island?

Summer

Che transcends space and time.

Come on, man, you can't lie to me. I can see your aura.

Seth, you put something out into the universe and you didn't get it back. I mean, I can't imagine what a blow that must have been to your male animus. You've been emasculated.

Seth

My masculinity is intact.

Je t'aime, Peaches.

Taylor

Oh, no, no, Henri, you don't have to say that.

But I love to say that. Because it is the truth! I will say it a thousand times if you like.

Taylor

Wow. That's, uh... okay, yeah. Say it a thousand times.

I love you un, I love you deux, I love you trois...

Seth

Hey, Che.

Seth! Hey, you look...

Seth

Not good. I know. So, that thing you said about the animus?

I was right, wasn't I? See, the flesh lies, but the aura never does.

Julie

Did you at least get my cookie bouquet?

Kirsten

I'm allergic to chocolate.

Julie

No you're not!

Kirsten

Then I'm allergic to you.

Sandy

Are you sure you don't wanna come?

Kirsten

Watching a movie about a guy eating a live octopus? I think I'll pass.

Seth

It's also got one of the greatest fight sequences in probably the last five years.

Ryan

[sarcastically to Seth] Yeah, I think that'll convince her.

Seth

Listen, Mom, what better way to see out your thirties than a little South Korean shock cinema.

Sandy

Nobody plans a surprise party like Sandy Cohen. I could've been with the CIA.

Ryan

Hmm.

Seth

[deadpan] I heard they're known for their birthday parties.

Ryan

I cannot believe that you tried to steal Newport Chuck.

Seth

Sometimes the universe makes you do things that you don't even understand.

Ryan

Sure. Well, Sandy didn't seem too upset about it.

Seth

Are you kidding? He's waited eighteen years for me to be arrested for political activism. It's probably the proudest moment of his entire life.

Taylor

I've never met an awkward silence I couldn't fill.