Danny has been such a workout nazi.
Why does everybody always say "nazi" when they're trying to describe someone who's just passionately pursuing a goal?
All S1
S1 E15Unfinished Business
[wanting Mindy to become a Christian] I mean, don't you wanna spend eternity in heaven together, just strumming harps and playing doubles tennis with Abe Lincoln and Tupac?
I am terrified for my life. It's like Sons of Anarchy out here. And none of the young, hot characters, just like the old ones.
Yeah, I get it. Haitians need help after their tsunami.
KKatie
Earthquake.
Ok... please... do not tell anyone I said that.
Shulman and Associates is not like a family. I was the only one who came to Betsy's Easter egg hunt.
What about when you're kidnapped? You would never make it as a sex slave. You're too ticklish. [tickles Mindy]
Hehehe [whacks Morgan with purse] stop it! I would be a fantastic sex slave.
I have my Haiti survival kit right here.
That looks like a bunch of shampoo
I mean there's other hair stuff, too.
I don't understand why you're a doctor, you could be a model. Anybody can be a doctor.
PPaul
I actually did think about being a model, until I was scouted and then I became a model.
It's interesting, actually, the same thing kinda happened to me--
No it didn't, it didn't.
CChristina
What do you think I discovered on your browser history?
What's a browser history?
It's a list of all the sites you visited.
Oh no.
The reason I hired Paul is because he's a good doctor. The patients all love him. He was featured on the cover of New York Magazine.
So what?! I was profiled in the New York Post! Remember when I found that thumb in my taco?
Ok, I have no office, I have no patients, I have this horrible short haircut, my name is not Dr. L anymore and I have a UTI from discount whipped cream.
You and me both, sister.
TTom
No, they seem nice enough, the next thing you know we go home with these girls, then you're married, and then you find a condom in your dog poop. And then you go "whoa, was somebody having sex with my dog?" Then you realize, no!, your wife is having sex with someone and your dog ate the condom!
PPaul
How can you do this?
[leans in and whispers] I ate an entire loaf of bread before I came here tonight.
PPaul
Oh, so you knew we were gonna do this?
Nope! I just do that every night, dawg!
I was thinking of doing some traveling.
You hate everywhere.
We got a crydaddy. I'm on it... Here's what we're gonna do. We'll take a deep breath, and we're gonna go from zone to man-to-man, and we're gonna get over there and have a baby.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's The Mindy Project pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.