A character in The Mindy Project
Played by Mindy Kaling
The Mindy Project · 97 quotes
Most-quoted character in The Mindy Project: in 69 of its 97 quotes
Most scenes with: Danny Castellano (23), Morgan Tookers (7), Peter Prentice (5)
Mindy, you need to move to Europe. Let me put it this way: Do you like good food?
MindyMm-hmm.
Do you like art?
MindyYep.
Do you like uncircumcised penises?
MindyHey.
Hey! Excuse me. Hello. We're in a restaurant.
I mean, they're everywhere.
MindyHere's the thing I'm worried about: I get there, no one speaks English, my hair dryer doesn't work, someone tries to pin a drug thing on me.
The key, Mindy, is to find a man who you are attracted to but don't respect and can't see a future with.
MindyDraco Malfoy.
Someone not fictitious.
How many best friends from college do you have?
MindyBest friend isn't a person Danny, it's a tier.
What about the ads in the diner placemats?
MindyThey shut that place down for human trafficking.
Ugh.
MindyI know, so sad. I loved their pork chops.
MindyWe hooked up once... And then a couple more times. But then only once.
Ok, you guys are sneaking around behind my back! You with an enemy of the practice! What do you do? Do you make fun of my piano playing?
MindyWhy would that come up?
It comes up!
MindyI like your piano playing.
Oh come on Mindy, please! My piano playing sucks!
Why are you going to Hell?
MindyI love gossip and I don't really care about the environment.
[to Morgan] You're fired.
MindyWhat?!
No. I did something unthinkable.
He did.
Gotta pay the ultimate price. One week suspension with pay.
MindyDanny has been such a workout nazi.
Why does everybody always say "nazi" when they're trying to describe someone who's just passionately pursuing a goal?
MindyYeah, I get it. Haitians need help after their tsunami.
Earthquake.
MindyOk... please... do not tell anyone I said that.
What about when you're kidnapped? You would never make it as a sex slave. You're too ticklish. [tickles Mindy]
MindyHehehe [whacks Morgan with purse] stop it! I would be a fantastic sex slave.
MindyI have my Haiti survival kit right here.
That looks like a bunch of shampoo
MindyI mean there's other hair stuff, too.
MindyI don't understand why you're a doctor, you could be a model. Anybody can be a doctor.
I actually did think about being a model, until I was scouted and then I became a model.
It's interesting, actually, the same thing kinda happened to me--
MindyNo it didn't, it didn't.
The reason I hired Paul is because he's a good doctor. The patients all love him. He was featured on the cover of New York Magazine.
MindySo what?! I was profiled in the New York Post! Remember when I found that thumb in my taco?
MindyOk, I have no office, I have no patients, I have this horrible short haircut, my name is not Dr. L anymore and I have a UTI from discount whipped cream.
You and me both, sister.
How can you do this?
Mindy[leans in and whispers] I ate an entire loaf of bread before I came here tonight.
Oh, so you knew we were gonna do this?
MindyNope! I just do that every night, dawg!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's The Mindy Project pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
