Betsy Putch quotes from The Mindy Project

Betsy

[Looks through costume box] A condom, a butt, a tampon, Ace Ventura, sperms.

Betsy

Now I'll have two famous signatures for my autograph book. You and... [proudly] mayor David Dinkins.

Mindy

Hey, you two. Quick question. Do you care about my career and want me to succeed?

Betsy

More than anything in the world.

Mindy

Okay, well if that is the case, why are you sending me non-English speaking, pregnant, immigrants with no health insurance, with literally burkahs and stuff?

I thought she might be rich with oil money.

Mindy

Well, she wasn't. She was poor with nothing money.

Well, why wouldn't you just tell her no?

Mindy

Because I am not good at saying no. Okay? One time I left a flea market with a samurai sword. I just need a different kind of patient.

Betsy

More white patients, done. [starts writing it down]

Mindy

Well don't write that. [whispers] But yes.

Morgan

One time to get a girl back, I drove a motorcycle through a flaming hoop.

Betsy

Who wouldn't marry a guy who has his own flaming hoop?

Morgan

[as if she's dumb] No, I borrowed the hoop, from my friend.

Morgan

Oh my God, Dr. L spotted the coffee cake, get out of the way we are bowling pins in her path!

Mindy

What? I don't want coffee cake, I'm still full from that chia seed I had last night.

Betsy

Oh no, I made an entire extra cake just for you, [scared] like you demand.