There you are.
We should come by sometime when there's not a corpse here to meet us.
S5 E14Red In Tooth And Claw
BBertram
See? I know how to play poker.
Of course you do.
BBertram
You play the man, not the cards. I know the odds, I know myself.
You know people, you know how to control them. Not that you always care.
BBertram
What does that mean?
Well, you win more flies with honey than with vinegar, but you use vinegar anyway.
BBertram
Is this about Lisbon?
You're very fond of the fake tell, aren't you? Before you bet you look away and you breath out very slowly, like you're trying to calm yourself.
BBertram
Yes.
Well, you have a tell inside the fake tell. When you're bluffing, the breathing is audible.
BBertram
The hell it is. I-I control myself.
You get yourself a good hand and puff away like that, Manchester will for sure think you're bluffing. Trust me.
How can you like Triceratops more than [in a deep voice] T. Rex?
T. Rex are losers. Little arms. It's a big chicken with teeth.
Yeah, and Triceratops is basically a pig with horns.
And a shield on its head. Beats a giant chicken any day of the week.
Ha ha, in your dreams. What did Jane want?
He wants us back at the museum.
What are we gonna do?
Museum heist.
Why?
I stopped asking questions a long time ago. Come on.
[Rigsby and Cho exit the elevator]
...And some scientists think the T. Rex could run up to 45 miles an hour. That's apex predator. You know what that means?
Yes.
That means they're top of the food chain. They eat everything.
So?
So... T. Rex beats Triceratops. I win.
You went home last night and Googled dinosaurs, didn't you?
Yeah, I did.
You have no life. I win.
[Rigsby sets down a cup of coffee on Van Pelt's desk]
I owe her from yesterday.
She's on her way to the airport.
Oh. Yeah, for that White Hat thing. I thought there was no money for that.
Lisbon fixed it.
Oh. Would have been nice to say good-bye.
Yeah, well, cowards don't get to say good-bye when they want.
Cowa— wow. Where'd that come from? You calling me a coward?
Yep.
How so?
How long have you been pretending you're not in love with Van Pelt?
Who says I'm in love with Van Pelt? I was once, a long time ago, but not anymore. We're just... We're just... good friends.
You're a coward and terrible liar. [walks away]
Uh, says you. "Coward." What does he know about relationships? [shouting after Cho] Yeah, well, you date pregnant hookers and your— your dinosaur eats grass!
Morning.
Good morning! We're gonna be short-staffed for a while. Van Pelt's off to L.A. Thank you.
Adult education's a beautiful thing. Uh, speaking of which, uh... I've upset the ecosystem of the poker game.
I think you've been spending too much time at the museum. "Upset the ecosystem"?
Bertram's now a better poker player because of me. The ecosystem has changed. You need to adapt or die.
Who says I need the help?
Don't try to razzle dazzle me. Money talks.
What do we use for stakes? You can't play poker without stakes.
Oh, I have that covered. [lining up dinosaur fruit snacks on the table] Herbivores are worth one, carnivores are worth five.
Okay.
Deal.
What do you got?
All in.
You're bluffing. I call.
Really?
[Jane displays his hand, a pair of aces]
Okay, are you cheating?
No.
Wha—
I'm gonna smoke you.
S5 E15Red Lacquer Nail Polish
How does one person live in a house this big?
Uh, let me see. By being very rich.
That's not what I meant.
Ah, you mean morally. Well, we've been called in, so it's likely that whoever lived here paid a hefty price in the end.
This place gives me the creeps.
Normally I'd be tempted to mock your superstition, but in this case I'm inclined to agree.
Well, we could get on board and wait.
Not without a warrant, we're not.
Ugh. Rules are just so... tiresome and boring.
Uh, Lisbon, I'm sorry, but I think we might have to get back to the crime scene.
Really? That place was so creepy.
Yes. But I'm worried we might have missed something because of that.
Okay, fine. But no jumping out and yelling "boo" at me or anything like that.
I mean, seriously, what do you take me for?
I am not going to answer that because I'm a nice person.
What? We followed the evidence.
You—you did. You... followed the evidence.
Okay. Okay, I was wrong. But we followed the evidence.
You know what gave me second thoughts about Elise Vogelsong? She read too many murder mystery novels.
There you go. That's not police work. That's guessing.
You should try it sometime. Now I'm gonna go pursue Red John. Ciao!
S5 E16There Will Be Blood
Her arrest continues to be a priority for Homeland.
I've heard you say that in the past, but you've never said why.
Lorelei Martins is a known associate of Red John. She escaped from prison. She kidnapped your colleague Patrick Jane.
Which are all valid reasons for the CBI to be involved, but Homeland? You deal with terrorists.
We have a wide range of investigative interests.
I have to learn that trick.
Which?
How you speak without saying anything.
Bertram is bringing Homeland into the Lorelai murder. Did you hear me?!
Yes.
Now that she's killed someone, they're gonna start looking again into her escape.
That's likely.
Jane. I know you broke her out of prison, and you know I know.
And I know you know I know.
This is not funny!. If they find out, you could be charged as an accomplice to murder.
Well, if they find out. They won't, unless, of course, you sing to the coppers.
Which I won't, and that makes me an accomplice to murder as well.
Well only if you look at it as a very persnickety lawyer.
She tortured someone!
Yeah. It's—it's horrible, I-I know. But she must have had good reason.
God, can you hear yourself?!
Yes, I hear myself. Julia Howard must have helped murder Lorelei's sister, must have been there with Red John. Lorelei wouldn’t do this otherwise. I trust her.
Jane... I am your partner, not her. You need to be honest with me.
I know.
If she contacts you, if you find anything out about her, if you have any insights about the case...
I will tell you.
You're foolish doing this on your own. Let me help you.
No. I've done terrible things. Unforgivable things. There's no way back. You and me are on different roads, I hope.
You're putting your trust in the mistress of a serial killer. She's playing you.
Playing me? How?
You're blind. You're involved with her. It's clouding your judgment.
There's no involvement. I feel nothing for her.
Now you're really lying. I'm gonna make this very simple. I will not be a part of this anymore, and neither will you, if you wanna remain with the team.
An ultimatum? Someone's playing a little too much poker. I confess. I-I may have some feelings, but if I have crossed any lines, it is not because I like her. I will do anything I can to get to Red John, but you have known that since the start.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's The Mentalist pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.