I can't believe they gave me a desk!
[Wylie giggles and begins setting up his desk]
You can call me "The Coyote."
That's just what they call me downstairs. Don't ask me why, though. They never told me.
Wile E. Coyote. "Roadrunner," the cartoon?
No, it's Irish, I think. Uh, good morning, Agent Stanley. Hey... Do you know the Roadrunner and the Coyote?
SAgent Stanley
Yeah. Sex traffickers in Dallas.
[whispering, concerned, to Cho] There's a cartoon about sex trafficking?
Hey, Cho, you got a minute?
[long pause, glancing at Wylie] Yeah.
You ran away again, Jane. Not from the F.B.I. - you ran away from me.
How was I supposed to know? I thought you were gone again forever.
Okay, you're right. I-I'm sorry, Lisbon. I... I didn't think about you.
Well that's not true! I made you one of my demands. I'm—I'm not joining the F.B.I. unless they make you a job offer.
That's my point. What makes you think I want to work with you again? You are difficult and exhausting, and maybe I don't want to put the rest of my life on hold to be your sidekick. Have you ever even thought about that?
No... no. I hadn't considered it.
[sighing] This room makes me feel like I'm in an aquarium, and everyone's looking at me.
Mm. Well, you could very easily feel like they're all in the aquarium and you're looking at them.
I'm following the conversation. The G-man says that I don't have adequate security clearance to work on the Whitaker case, and Fischer is arguing.
Are you reading their lips?
I would be if I didn't have to answer inane questions.
I'm not your boss. Why would you say that?
It's just that sometimes now you act like you are.
But we're equals, partners.
Okay, fine. Just remember that.
[I]f Whitaker was murdered because of his highly sensitive military work with the Pentagon, I shouldn't know anything about that. So, I'll happily leave.
DAgent Daniels
Wait. What did you tell him?
DDaniels
Who told you that he works for the Pentagon? And consider your answer well.
DDaniels
Don't be absurd. I've never seen you before.
No, but your presence here told me, because you wouldn't be here if he worked for, uh, Pottery Shack or Pizza Barn, would you?
You're excused. [to Fischer] He's a little slow on the uptake, this one.
DDaniels
Fischer, this is unacceptable.
No, no. Hush. Don't apologize. Don't take it out on her. She didn't do anything.
Thank you, Curtis. We'll be in touch.
CWCurtis Whitaker
Thank you. Good day to you. [Curtis turns to leave the room]
[before Curtis exits] Well, he's a prime suspect.
CCurtis
[stops and asks Jane, dumbfounded] Say again?
Oh, I was talking to my colleagues. Bye, Curtis.
They'll try again. They just need to be lulled into a false sense of security.
And how do we lull them like that?
We need to arrest someone else and charge them with Whitaker's murder.
We can't arrest people under false pretenses.
AFAbbott and Fischer
[in unison] No.
Oh. Well, that's a problem. I guess we need to think outside of the box.
That's always a bad sign.
Hey, are you gonna be home for dinner?
Wait. Are you at that dirty taco truck?
[Rigsby crams the rest of his taco into his mouth]
[sighs] I can literally hear you trying to think up an excuse.
No, that's the sound of me eating a taco. Salad tonight, I promise. I love you, bye.
MPAgent Marcus Pike
I'm Special Agent Marcus Pike. This is Agent Searls. You're Patrick Jane, right? Abbott's guy.
SAgent Searls
Thanks for, uh, sharing your floor with us.
You people need some help, huh?
[laughs] What makes you say that?
[gestures to Searls] His shoulders.
SSearls
[readjusting his posture] Hey, now, uh—
Hey, now, I'm just saying, if you need some help, I could help you. I mean, murder is my business.
Sure. I've heard good things about you. We'd be happy to have your input.
You volunteered us to handle the case?
I decide what cases we take next.
Well, I was just being neighborly, and the art squad seemed all for it.
Well, of course they were. They've been chasing this group for years, with no luck.
And what do you know about catching art thieves?
Uh, nothing at all. That's why it'll be fun.
[Fischer laughs]
Okay. We'll take it. Get a hold of Agent Pike in the art squad and get up to speed on this thing. Let's show 'em how it's done.
My plan is a little more elaborate, but it's much more entertaining.
Well, as you know, Agent Lisbon, the key to a good con is always making the mark feel that he is in control. I mean, you can lead a man anywhere as long as he thinks that he is driving.
Well, first, we rope them in with some flash, then we steer them towards a couple of good inside men, a face. We're gonna need some art for the gaff, and then a good false blow-off.
I don't know what any of that means.
Where does all this stuff come from?
Sometimes we get just part of a haul, and we sit on the art so the crooks don't know have a lead, and we keep it here while we investigate the rest of it.
And nobody knows about it?
Well, we keep a pretty tight lid. Our own secret museum.
Impressive. You bring dates here?
No... Just...Once or twice.
So, what's the plan to catch these art thieves?
Well, I am just as curious as you are. Jane has been playing this real close to his chest until he figures it out. He said he'll be here to brief us any moment.
[Wylie enters, carrying a notepad and several paper bags]
Still at the party house.
[laughs] Wait till you see it!
Uh, w— this is his idea. How are we supposed to know what to do if he's not here to tell us?
[chuckles] Okay, very well. Please brief the team, Agent Wylie.
Okay! Uh... Here we go. We want the leader of the gang, the one who shot John Hennigan; to find him, we need to gain the trust of Pulaski. So, we know he likes to spend time at his favorite bar. That's where we rope him. We need to plant some bugs and cameras in the bar.
So I can monitor it from here. [to Abbott, handing him something from a paper bag] You're our roper. Jane said you'd know about boxing.
Oh. Well, I never told him, but, yes, I do. [Abbott unfolds and holds up a khaki jacket]
So does Pulaski. That's a good place to start. Uh, I've got some tips for you, if you, uh...
[Abbott gives Wylie a sidelong glance]
But, uh, you — you probably know what you're doing. [to Cho] You're the muscle. Jane said that you could handle your own wardrobe?
Uh... oh, Jane said that the two of you could work out the choreography.
Lisbon is playing the inside man, uh, uh, woman - inside woman, with Jane. He wants you to wear this. [he tosses her something from another paper bag]
[Lisbon unfolds it to reveal a form-fitting cocktail dress]
It's a bit much, isn't it?
[Fischer opens the bag and removes a leopard-print minidress]
You're the face. Once Pulaski is at the party, you lure him into the bedroom. Uh, Jane's got some ideas...
Uh, yeah. Thanks. I think I've got it under control.
Then Jane and Lisbon take over.
Uh... [consults notepad] "And then the fun really starts." That's a direct quote.
