[hearing a bark from the bedrooms] What was that?
Rose brought a dog home from the supermarket.
What, couldn't she just get stew meat like she usually does?
“Joust Between Friends” · Season 2, Episode 9
In this episode: Dorothy Zbornak (6), Blanche Devereaux (6), Rose Nylund (3), Sophia Petrillo (1)
[about the dog] He followed me home.
Oh come on, Rose, you drive to the market. How did he follow you home, in a taxi?!
Ma, it's 8 o'clock in the morning, what are you doing with the sherry?
Don't worry! I'm not gonna drink it. I was just gonna hide it from the dog.
[pretending the dog is talking to her] Don't explain, Rose. I used to live with a couple of bitches myself.
[to Dorothy] Eat dirt and die, trash.
AMr. Allen
[Dorothy introduces him to her mother] Pleased to meet you, Mrs. Petrillo. What brings you to our humble home?
Is he gay?
Uh, come on, honey, I'll walk you to the car.
AMr. Allen
Goodbye, Mrs. Petrillo. Sorry you didn't have an opportunity to experience our museum. I'd love for you to see my most prized acquisition - a magnificent pair of Gauguins.
What are you, a pervert?!! I was married for 45 years, I never even saw my husband's gauguins!
I feel that you have backed me into a corner, and when I am backed into a corner, I come out fightin' like a wildcat. Unless I've had too much to drink, in which case I slide down the wall and make mad passionate love on the carpet.
[responding to Mr. Allen] I'd be happy to, Mr. Allen.
[mocking Dorothy] Be happy to, Mr. Allen. My my, Dorothy, aren't we licking boots a little early this morning?
I had a light breakfast.
I knew you've been hiding something. You no-good, back-stabbing Jezebel, I demand you show me that paper!
I'm sorry, flattery won't work!
[on the phone] Hello? ... Dorothy isn't here. ... She was arrested on a morals charge this morning. ... I know, you just never know, do you? Have a nice day!
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