The Gentlemen quotes

Sabrina Horniman

[being driven away] Did you notice a lot of crucifixes?

Among other things.

Sabrina Horniman

There's something very strange going on.

Gabrielle

[calling Jack, spying on Eddie, Geoff and Takashi breaking into a cottage] They've just pulled up to a cottage now. Three of them got out. The Duke, the keeper, and some Japanese-looking geezer.

Do we know any Japanese-looking gentlemen?

Jack Glass

Dad's chef?

[on phone] Keep your head down and us updated.

Jack Glass

Why are we keeping an eye on the Duke then?

He's sniffing around the Italians. Too much nose to bum. He's been pulling on the lead a bit recently. Not a lot. Just a little tug every now and again. It's just a feminine instinct at this stage, Jackie boy. But I wouldn't underestimate that instinct.

[served a drink by Susie in the boxing training gym office] Thank you. What a wonderful place for an office. Such a masculine atmosphere. You can just taste the testosterone. And yet here you sit, a beautiful rose in a tangle of thorns.

I like to think my feminine sensibilities act as something of a counterbalance.

What are you gonna do with the rat? Kill it or let it out in the garden?

Kill it.

[realizes implication] There is a rat, isn't there? [holds out hand and Richard embraces it and kisses it]

[Eddie and Geoff pull up to Hastead manor] Good afternoon, Captain. You look like you've had a day of it. Anything you'd like to divulge?

Why don't we discuss it over a cup of tea?

Let's skip the tea. Get to the part where you tell me why there's a body in the back of your car. Are you gonna deny it?

Geoffrey? [Geoff opens trunk to reveal Takashi's body] I have a plan for that body.

Can I remind you of your position in the hierarchy? You work with us, not outside of us, and at the end of the day, my dad is the boss. It's best not to forget that.

I am well aware of the hierarchy, Susan. Who is he? There's a long and complicated explanation, which I'll share with you in the fullness of time. Back to the plan, please. [motions head] The plan is to use this body to bring Lord Hawthorne into the fold, thus securing my place in the House of Lords. First, we get one of your people to intercept him at one of his decadent, all-weekend parties. When he sets his drink aside, we'll slip him a goodnight pill. And the next morning, he'll wake up to a lovely surprise. [Lord Hawthorne wakes up in bed next to Takashi's body]

[calling] Lord Hawthorne, how are you this fine morning? Oh, that's terrible. Where are you? Good thing you called me. We have an understanding with the people that own that venue, so it's definitely something I can help you with. As luck could have it, we happen to be in the neighborhood. Stay where you are.

[walking into hotel room to see Takashi's body] Looks like quite the party.

Lord Hawthorne

I have no idea what happened.

Don't worry, Dickie. I'm sure we can find a way to sort it out for you. All will be well, won't it, Eddie?

Exactly.

[sitting in vehicle] So your intention is to let the bill go through, decriminalize mɑrіjսɑnɑ, and evoke the wrath of my dearly beloved father because, what, you wanna go legitimate?

It's not about legitimate or illegitimate, Susie. It's about having our cake and eating it. With Lord Hawthorne's backing, we let the bill go through. Then, meanwhile, we invest in a legitimate company that we bring in to sell our illegally grown weed on a legitimate market, avoiding the cost of regulation, undercutting our competitors, and becoming the corner shop of cannabis.

What about the elephant in the room? My father wants the bill blown out of the water.

Your father's got the blinkers on.

He's not gonna appreciate being blindsided.

Then we wait until we can present a fait accompli and we choose our moment extremely carefully.

"We"?

Yes, we. I was always gonna bring you in. I wanted to make sure I could deliver.

And you're confident you can?

Well, with you on board, I am.

I'd better think about it very carefully, then.

You'd better.

What are you praying for, Freddy?

For guidance.

And do you feel like you have received that guidance?

I don't know, I don't know.

He is listening. I prayed to him when I lost my brother. And my prayers were answered.

Because now I've got you. You are praying for your loss, for that which was taken from you. And here I am, right by your side. For we are now brothers. And together, [places hand on Freddy's shoulder] we'll make sure we get back what's rightfully yours.

[to Eddie looking over pastures] Oh, this is a beautiful spot. Really peaceful.

You're spoiling the moment. Again.

Morning, Susan.

Captain. Been taking a look at your projections. I didn't realize mɑrіjսɑnɑ was the second-most valuable crop in the United States.

Mm. Other than soybeans. Americans do love a soybean.

Reckon there's a political will to push it through?

Decriminalization is a win-win. Not only do you reduce crime, relieving pressure on the police and freeing up space in the prisons for those naughty little criminals, you also bring in additional tax revenue worth billions a year. Consumers will be able to choose between expensive legal weed that they buy in a shop and inexpensive illegal weed they buy on the street.

You're confident decriminalization wouldn't have a negative impact on the pre-existing market that's provided both bread and butter to my family for the last generation?

The only difference is, instead of one line on the graph, there are now two big, fat ones.

The prospect of doing this without my father's permission leaves me with a sense of trepidation. He may look like Father Christmas, but if you end up on his naughty list, a lump of coal at the bottom of your stocking is gonna be the least of your worries.

The bill's gonna go through, whether he likes it or not. If we get in now, we can use our position to take advantage. We wait, and we get left behind.

Hm.

Can I count on your support?

[answers phone] You all right, Jimmy?

Sorry to interrupt you, boss. I think we've got a bit of a problem down at the farm. Only it's a bit delicate. Maybe even politically motivated.

What sort of problem, Jimmy?

They call it a go-slow. It's a strike aimed at reducing productivity by moving at half the speed.

Bobby Glass

So what’s these whispers I’m hearing?

What whispers?

Bobby Glass

Rumors from the firmament. Things that I’m not being told. Things that I’m hearing secondhand.

You’ll have to be more specific, Dad. Joe Green. [Susie scoffs] He’s a fucking wrong’un.

I bumped into him when we were buying the Botticelli. I’ve not seen him in years.

Bobby Glass

That’s because he’s in the chop game. And that’s something we don’t wanna be fucking involved in.

Fucking hell. Spare me the speech. I’ve heard it more than I care to remember.

Bobby Glass

All right, all right. Look, I know you and Joe go back a long way. All right? And I don’t mind you saying hello to him. You know, “Hello, Joe. You want a cup of tea and a sticky bun?” But if he starts offering you a kilo of packet, that’s fucking something different. There needs to be a strict delineation.

I hear you loud and clear, Dad.

Have you heard the news? The King is in.

Ah, swift work, Nanny. Thank you.

Charlotte’s raced up to tell Mama.

Hm. How are you?

All right, good.

Well, she’ll be very happy. We haven’t had a visit from a monarch since the 18th century, believe it or not.

Well, he’s particularly excited to meet you, Eddie. A duke done good in farming, no less. When I told him about how much you’re raking in on your various agricultural exploits, he was gagging to find out more.

I hope you didn’t build me up too much.

You won’t disappoint, Eddie. You won’t. You’ve changed since you left the army. In a good way, I hasten to add. Most people who’ve seen what you have will either disappear into a bottle or blow their brains out.

It’s certainly a struggle for many of our comrades. Some more than others.

Well, you, my friend, do seem to have grabbed life by the lapels.

That’s kind of you to say, Nanny. But I think, uh, it’s not 100% accurate.

You’ve never been any good at taking compliments, Eddie. Part of your charm, I suppose.

Hm.

Anyway, I’ll go and lend some moral support. Preparations for a royal visit can feel daunting to the uninitiated.

Unfortunately, Mr. MacDougall has decided not to pursue your offer.

And you proposed the 18, as discussed?

I did indeed.

Any insight into why he didn’t agree?

He declined to go into details with me over the phone, but his response was emphatic.

Emphatic how?

Ah, a certain amount of language was used.

[flashback scene] It’s my land, and I’m not gonna sell it to that posh cunt!

Hm. I think a more direct approach might be necessary. Neighbor to neighbor.

Sorry to bother you, Mr. MacDougall. The Duke would like a word.

He’s here?

Hello, Simon. Sorry to drop in unannounced.

Your Grace.

So, what do we owe this rare pleasure to?

Well, uh, I heard you’ve decided to sell up.

That’s correct.

I was a little disappointed that you hadn’t let me know, given the conversation we had.

Yes, sorry about that. I decided to, uh, test the water on the open market. The offer I gave you is much higher than you’d get on the open market.

I mean, why don’t we just save yourself the trouble?

I’d prefer not to.

And, uh, do you have another buyer in the waiting?

Nope, not yet.

Uh, Simon, is there anything I’ve done to offend you?

I’ve lived next door to your family for 15 years. Every Christmas, we’ve invited you round for drinks. Not once has anyone dignified us with a response to say that you could not make it.

Well, I am a very busy man, Simon, and my mother a poor correspondent. For that, I can only apologize for our collective failures. In the light of that, why don’t I raise the offer to 19 million right here, right now, and we call it a day?

You see, you... you know what the trouble is with… with people like.... like you? You... you think you’re better than us, with your… with your seat and your title and your… your dodgy mates. Don’t think I don’t know what goes on up at that estate. I’ve... I’ve heard the rumors. You think you can just buy whatever you want, but the truth is that you can’t. So, why don’t you take your 19 million and shove it up your arse?ǃ

I don’t blame you, Simon, for the cloud of misapprehension that you’re currently under. My offer to you is 19 million. Tomorrow, it will be 18. The next day, 17. And it will continue to decrease until it reaches zero. It’s a very generous offer. I suggest you accept it.

If you think you can intimidate me, like some kind of gangster, you can’t.

But what if you were right, Simon? What if, as well as a duke and a peer of the realm, I was, indeed, a gangster? Do you really think that you can stop me getting what I want?

Just let me do the talking from now on, okay? It's a big fսcking deal. You need this, I need this, we both need this. Be professional. Stuff that shithole.

We will, 100%.

[Victor executes Ned] Fսck!

You don't make money by stealing from Bobby Glass. Instead, you make an enemy out of him. If you make Bobby Glass your friend, if he respects you and you work with him, that's how you make money from Bobby Glass.

Bobby Glass

If you’d brought this to me sooner, there wouldn’t have been a problem, you see, ’cause I’d have stopped it. Now there’s been a whole catalog of issues, and in every instance, I would have said no. I mean, you start messing around with the gear so much that people are murdering government officials. No. You start letting workers walk away from their operation so they can come back and steal from us. No. You start agreeing to sit down with people who stole from us. No. No. Fucking no. Here’s what you’re gonna do. Nothing. I’ll handle it.

No. No, no, no, no. We cannot do nothing. We have to locate the product and get it off the open market.

I’ll handle it.

No. If the police trace the weed back to us, the effects of that would be catastrophic. Well, what would be catastrophic is if we sat down with these people, ’cause that makes us look weak, and that is not acceptable. As soon as they start shifting the product, we’ll find them. We’ve got soldiers on the street of every city in this country. And the moment they get a sniff, well, they’re gonna let us know. In fact, if you listen very carefully, you might be able to hear ’em now. [gestures] Can you hear that? Can... Can you hear them?

No, Bobby.

Jack Glass

It’s the sound of the jungle drums, Eddie.

Bobby Glass

That’s right, Jackie boy. It’s the sound of the jungle drums. And as soon as the message comes through, we’ll move in and kill the lot of ’em. [clap hands] Job done.

No. We are not waiting that long.

Bobby Glass

Well, what’s the rush?

The rush? Bobby, as you’ve said many times in the past, the key to our success is in longevity, our ability to stay under the radar. If people start fucking murdering each other and going mad on the street, the police, the press, they have a field day.

Bobby Glass

No, you... you don’t get to tell me about longevity.

He’s right, though, Dad. It’s bad for business.

Bobby Glass

Look, you’re caught up in the micro, but you’re failing to take in the macro of it all. That’s where the real longevity kicks in. From where I’m standing, this problem could be to our advantage. I mean, a load of lads losing their marbles over a marijuana-induced psychosis on the eve of the vote for the decriminalization is, um... Well, it might be the final little push we need.