The Brak Show · Season 1
Allow me to introduce myself. I am Mobab von Hoffman. Perhaps you've heard of me.
I sure have. Just a second ago when you said, "I am Mobab von Hoffman"!
You're not very bright, are you?
Who wants to know?
[Looks at Mom] And who is this [knocks down Brak so he can get closer to Mom] vision of exquisite beauty?
Funny you should ask. [Singing]
It's your fault, Zorak! If you hadn't brought that brutally handsome gentleman into this house, I'd still have a mommy!
And I would still have a robust woman to carry my coffee beans to the roasting facility!
Brak! Stop driving your little baby car around Saint Babiesburg and take your asteroid smashing like a man!
Do you find me more attractive like this [puts his hand on his chin] or like this? [raises one finger]
I don't know, let me see them again.
Time is an abstract concept created by carbon-based lifeforms to monitor their ongoing decay.
Live wolfs do not make comfortable footwear. As a matter of fact, they are eating their way up my leg (Brak Gasps) as I speak to you now.
Why don't you ride your girl-bike home and put on your sundress? You'll look so pretty.
[Robot is dragging him away from staring contest] Hey, what? Get your filthy probes off me!
Where are you going Nancy? Don't you want to finish our little dance?
I didn't blink! I was winning! Arg! I'll be back!
"C'mon, give that sweet saddle a rattle! Squeeze her butt!"
"I am NOT squeezing her BUTT!!!!"
[Slaps nose off of Brak] "Nose overboard" [Huckleberry Hound runs to get nose]
[to Zorak] Oh, that's right, you're a remorseless sinner.
Hey, what happened to my bed? [Brak's bed is covered in a thick, bubbling slime]
Yeah, that's my funk. Leave it alone. It's resting.
Well, where did it come from?
Do you really want to know?
No, I suppose not.
[to Mom] I don't think you should touch me. This disease is on the rampage. It's spreadin' like wildfire!
I guess it's goodbye Brak the happy, go-lucky man about town...and hello, Brak the ruthless clam slayer.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's The Brak Show pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
