Next up is a $500 million ad blitz with OOH, e-blasts, print and digital. Ain’t nobody won’t know about the Democratic Church of America… and its chosen prophet.
[sighs] Prophets are servants.
Of course, sir. Great point. We’re just trying to ease people into it.
No, no, no. We need to prepare America for my ascension. We must be honest. We must be direct. I like “savior.” Or–Or…
Lord. Yes, I couldn’t agree more, sir. Religion is not about being meek. We should dominate the seven mountains of society, bring the Kingdom of Heaven to Earth! Amen!
Amen.
Amen! I love all that!
So fucking dope.
Easter is just around the corner. How perfect would it be for your second coming to come on the day of Jesus' resurrection?
Mmm… Second coming? Let's be clear: I am not the son of God.
Well, of course. Many people believe that Jesus is both God incarnate and the son.
Well, that's just confusing. I don't want my church getting involved in all... that.
Exactly. Besides, if we pull up our timeline, you won't have… [picks up a bag with a large book inside] this.
[Firecracker kneels in front of Homelander, who accepts the book. He takes it out of the bag and sees "The Homelander Bible" with himself embossed on the cover.]
We're gonna drag our feet because of a book?
Not a book. The book. The Homelander Bible.
[pause; lifts the book with his hands] Heavy.
[quietly] What the fuck?
It's got the Old Testament, the New Testament, and the brand new American Testament, written by A.I. trained on the works of Pat Robertson. See, we need to pass the torch, sir. From Jesus to you. Sir, we don't get more than one chance at a first impression. Are we really gonna rush something this important? We ain't Arby's, after all.
No.
We're the Cheesecake Factory.
[sighs deeply] Okay. We'll do it your way.
Thank you.
You do realize this kind of sudden religious upheaval is likely to generate widespread civil unrest?
Local law should be able to handle the suburbs, but we could use extra hands in major metros.
Oh, let's recall all Supes stationed overseas. American heroes should be protecting America, not Who-Gives-A-Fuckistan.
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