Angus Sampson quotes from Thank God You're Here

Angus Sampson

Whenever you're feeling very very ill, get in the ring with Ozzie Boxing Phil.

Angus Sampson

[As a police officer, having burst into a warehouse to catch some criminals] It's scum like you that got The Curiosity Show taken off air.

I am the Amphibian Man. My code name is Get Me Out Of Here Immediately.

I am the Spotty Dick. And my code name is Chunder.

And you, fellow?

Angus Sampson

My name is Beaver. My code name is Beaver.

Does this mean you and I are through?

Angus Sampson

Well... Let’s just work that out. (He draws a graph on the whiteboard.) If we take this variable as Monday to Friday. This variable: 9 to 5. I take 12 to 3 off, I could fit you in on Tuesdays to Thursdays 12 to 3.

You said you loved me, John.

Angus

Well, I love you, too.

Good.

Angus

To health, love, and multimedia legislation.

I hate to be a stickler for tradition, but if we could have that in Latin, just to keep in with...

In vino veritas, et avec omnibus we travel.

We were looking at possible changes, you had mentioned, Brother, you wanted to change some of the prayers to sort of update them for the young people. To keep it fresh.

Angus

Wanted to get the Snoop Dogg language happening, the ‘shizzleator’ into the blessings.

Shizzleator?

Angus

Shizzleator.

How would that sound?

Angus

Ordered my shizzle, oblezzile, essing with ezzizzle, a celebrizzle of the word of the jizzle.

Come let us be gay

Angus Sampson

Ah, my favourite part of the evening

[referring to Ozzie Phil's pies] They say that they are Australian pies but, where are they made?

Angus Sampson

New Zealand.

It says on the box "Made in Thailand".

Angus

That's Thailand on the north island of New Zealand.

How do you do it with the ladies? What's your secret?

Angus Sampson

Well, first I listen to them. I look at them and then I touch them.

Listen for his opening line that he's famous for.

Angus Sampson

Nice gloves.

What deck are you on, Mr. Higginbottom?

Angus Sampson

The top. Always the top.

Angus Sampson

George used to say to me...

Yes, Mr. Higginbottom?

Angus Sampson

Don't rush me woman.

You don't mind being outranked by a woman, do you?

Angus Sampson

I always prefer them on top.