Donatello quotes from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2012)

April

Careful, Donnie, that's a dangerous mutant!

Donatello

That makes two of us!

Donatello

Are you saying turtles are slow?

Michelangelo

That's a hurtful stereotype.

Leonardo

Trust us, April, we are better keeping a low profile. We figured out people treat us better if they don't know we exist.

April

Sorry, I'm just so excited to finally get you out of the sewer for a change.

Raphael

What are you talking about? We go out all the time.

April

Yeah, but tonight you're gonna do something besides hitting people.

Raph

[disappointed] Aw...

Shredder

Your skills are impressive. But they will not save you.

Donatello

Oh, man. You think that's the Shredder?

Raphael

Well, it's definitely a Shredder.

Shredder

There is undoubtedly a fascinating story as to how my old nemesis came to teach ninjitsu to four mutant turtles. Perhaps I will let one of you live long enough to tell it.

Leonardo

You're gonna have to catch us first! Mikey!?

Mikey

So long, sucker!

Donatello

[Panting, turns to Master Splinter] Sensei, can we rest for a sec?

Splinter

Rest? Hm. The Shredder will not rest... until you are all dead!

Leonardo

Look, guys, Raph and I may be better fighters, but you´re still an important part of this team.

Donatello

[annoyed] As important as you two?

Leo

Humm... Very important. We shouldn't compare ourselves. It's like apples and oranges.

Raphael

[Muttering] Yeah, if apples were way better, which they are.

Don

So, the truth comes out.

Michelangelo

You guys think of us as some kind of... B Team!

Raph

Good one, Dr. Namenstein. We'll call you "The B Team"!

Mikey

Thanks. I mean, hey!

Leonardo

We are not taking that monster home with us!

Michelangelo

He's not a monster! He's a giant, Kraang-crushing, mutant alligator monster! [realizes what he just said] I just said "monster", didn't I?

Yeah.

Mikey

Well, you know what I meant!

Raph

I thought you meant "monster".

Donatello

Yeah.

Leo

Mm-hm.

Michelangelo

[on the phone with Donnie] Donnie, we need help!! Raph's been bitten by a giant, poisonous, robotic fish!!

Donatello

That's not possible! If he was bitten, then it's venom, not poison.

Michelangelo

Interesting, interesting. GET OVER HERE!!

Donatello

What are his symptoms?

Michelangelo

He keeps telling me I'm the smartest guy he knows.

Donatello

Okay, okay, he's delusional.

Donatello

I know I've seen this symbol; it's so familiar.

Michelangelo

The Olympics!

Don

No!

Mikey

I got it! The Olympics!

Donnie

Stop guessing! Obviously it's a Kraang signal.

Leo

But from where?

Mikey

The Olympics!

Donnie

QUIT IT!!

Donatello

Leo, it's not that bad. You blew up the Kraang ship.

Leonardo

[dejected] But I also blew our chance to get Karai on our side.

Raph

Look, she's Shredder's daughter! His blood! She was never gonna be on our side!

Leo

Yeah, maybe you're right. Maybe I just was believing what I wanted to.

Mikey

I've been there, dude. For me, it was leprechauns.

Leo

Are you seriously comparing what I am going through to the time you found out leprechauns aren't real?

Mikey

Leprechauns aren't real!?

Leonardo

Donnie, you gotta turn off his A.I.

Donatello

Turn off his A.I.? That's like turning off his brain!

Leonardo

He's too dangerous.

Donatello

He has to keep it open for us.

Leonardo

But what about him?

Donatello

We don’t have a choice.

Michelangelo

(April has found a cat on the road and asks the turtles to take care of her) Awww!!! Look at you! (Cuddling) Coochie-woochie-woochie! (To Donnie) Can we keep her?

Donatello

You know, Master Splinter is a rat.

Casey

Yeah. What if that cat goes nuts and attacks him? She'll feed of his body for months.

Donatello

You know, there is something seriously wrong with you.

Donatello

[furious] Michelangelo... You attacked April's MOTHER?!?!?!?!?!

Raphael

Mikey, have you completely cracked your shell?

Michelangelo

I don't trust her. She's all kinds of wrong. You guys got to believe me.

Leonardo

Oh, just like the time tiny elves stole your nunchucks and replaced 'em with mozzarella sticks?

Michelangelo

Yes!

Raphael

Or the time you and ice cream kitty entered a break dancing contest?

Michelangelo

Exactly!

Casey

Stop it, Mikey. Do you have any idea how much this means to April? If you ruin this for her-

Michelangelo

[irritated] Fine! If you don't believe me, I'll prove it. [he leaves in anger, while the others look at each other]

Donatello

Wait. Did April kiss me back there?

Casey

Dream on, Donnie. Dream on.