[in disbelief] How many times have I told you not to skateboard in the lair?!
Michelangelo[missing the point] None, Sensei.
[annoyed] I shouldn't have to tell you!
(As they get up) You're right, Sensei. We definitely should have known better—
(The Turtles glare at Mikey before bowing their heads in disappointment)
(Disappointed) —and we deserve to be punished. Eh, some.
(Sternly gets up in Leo's face while stroking his thin beard) And what do you think would be a fitting punishment?
(Nervous, looking at his brothers, who whistle innocently) Well, uh, we… we should clean up our mess? [Splinter folds his arms] And then.... think about what we did.
(Muttering quickly together) Yeah. Sounds about right. We were wrong. Wouldn't want to do too much. No worries.
(Testing them) What about being grounded for a week?
(Hesitant) Oh, I'm not sure that's-
(Quickly trying to escape it) I'm cool with the thinking.
(Anxious) Really, that's not necessary.
(Dismissive) Maybe next time.
(Angry) YOU'RE GROUNDED FOR A WEEK!
(The Turtles groan in defeat as the skateboard ramp collapses behind them, leaving an even bigger mess.)
Are you saying turtles are slow?
Michelangelo
That's a hurtful stereotype.
Trust us, April, we are better keeping a low profile. We figured out people treat us better if they don't know we exist.
Sorry, I'm just so excited to finally get you out of the sewer for a change.
What are you talking about? We go out all the time.
Yeah, but tonight you're gonna do something besides hitting people.
[Leo is watching Space Heroes. Just then, Raph turns the TV off with a shuriken.]
What? Hey, what are you doing?!
Oh sorry, it was Spike's idea. He said Space Heroes is too stupid for him.
That's saying something, considering he hangs out with you all day.
Oh, nice going, Leo. You made him angry, so I'm gonna mop the floor with your face!
Michelangelo
I can help with that! [throws a water balloon at Raph's face, splashing him with water] Dr. Prankenstein strikes again!
[Raph comes up to him, furious.]
Michelangelo
Dude, you should see your face right now. You look so mad!
Okay, Spike, you'll like this show. It's called "Does Mikey Bend that Way?"! [chases Mikey as he screams] Come here, you!
Mikey! Throw the water balloon!
Michelangelo
Uh, what water balloon?
The one you were gonna hit me with!
Michelangelo
[looks at the water balloon behind his back] Dude, you are good. [Throws the water balloon, Leo and Mikey take cover, and the van explodes in seconds.]
Nice shot, M - [Gets hit by Mikey's water balloon.]
Michelangelo
Doctor Prankenstein for the win!
You had two? Where do you keep them?
Look, guys, Raph and I may be better fighters, but you´re still an important part of this team.
[annoyed] As important as you two?
[Leo and Raph look at each other.]
Humm... Very important. We shouldn't compare ourselves. It's like apples and oranges.
[Muttering] Yeah, if apples were way better, which they are.
Michelangelo
You guys think of us as some kind of... B Team!
Good one, Dr. Namenstein. We'll call you "The B Team"!
We are not taking that monster home with us!
Michelangelo
He's not a monster! He's a giant, Kraang-crushing, mutant alligator monster! [realizes what he just said] I just said "monster", didn't I?
RDRaphael, Donatello and Leonardo
Yeah.
Well, you know what I meant!
I thought you meant "monster".
Michelangelo
[on the phone with Donnie] Donnie, we need help!! Raph's been bitten by a giant, poisonous, robotic fish!!
That's not possible! If he was bitten, then it's venom, not poison.
Michelangelo
Interesting, interesting. GET OVER HERE!!
Michelangelo
(April has found a cat on the road and asks the turtles to take care of her) Awww!!! Look at you! (Cuddling) Coochie-woochie-woochie! (To Donnie) Can we keep her?
You know, Master Splinter is a rat.
Yeah. What if that cat goes nuts and attacks him? She'll feed of his body for months.
You know, there is something seriously wrong with you.
Here, Mom. (Gives her a cup of hot tea)
ONMrs. O'Neil
Thank you, April. I'm still a little shaky. I know this is hard to believe, but, the Kraang ship has been here for years. It was your great-grandfather who discovered it. He made the mistake of awakening the Kraang. They paid him back by experimenting on him, and his entire bloodline. They knew we were the key to unlocking their precious mutagen. We were their Guinea pigs.
Michelangelo
Aw. Guinea pigs are so cute.
I told you not to be stupid, you moron!
ONMrs. O'Neil
After you were born, it was clear you were very special. We knew it was only a matter of time before the Kraang came for you. We escaped. Kirby fled with you to the city, but I was recaptured and put into stasis.
All these years. I never knew what happened to you. I didn't know what to think. Dad would never tell me.
ONMrs. O'Neil
Now you know. And now we never have to be apart again. Where is Kirby anyway?
Oh, he got turned into a freaky Kraang-headed mu-
You had to pull a Mikey didn't ya?
He's just kidding, Mrs. O'Neil. Kirby's on a...safari in Puerto Rico. He won't be back for a while.
ONMrs. O'Neil
I'm just so glad to have my April back.
[furious] Michelangelo... You attacked April's MOTHER?!?!?!?!?!
Mikey, have you completely cracked your shell?
Michelangelo
I don't trust her. She's all kinds of wrong. You guys got to believe me.
Oh, just like the time tiny elves stole your nunchucks and replaced 'em with mozzarella sticks?
[Flashback starts with Mikey sleeping, while tiny elves replacing Mikey's nunchucks with mozzarella sticks.]
Michelangelo
Yes!
Or the time you and ice cream kitty entered a break dancing contest?
[Flashback of Kitty and Mikey dancing]
Michelangelo
Exactly!
Stop it, Mikey. Do you have any idea how much this means to April? If you ruin this for her-
Michelangelo
[irritated] Fine! If you don't believe me, I'll prove it. [he leaves in anger, while the others look at each other]
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2012) · 371 quotes
