Raph quotes from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2012)

[after Raphael wins a sparring contest] Yame! You all did very well.

Raph

But I did better.

This is about self-improvement, Raphael, it is not about winning and losing.

Raph

I know, sensei, but I won and they lost. [Splinter pinches a painful pressure point on his neck] Aah, aah, aah! But, what's really important is that we all did our best. GOOD JOB, EVERYONE!

Heh, heh, heh.

View quote →

You were not fully prepared for what was up there. I trained you to fight as individuals, not as a team. And as your teacher, your father, the responsibility for that is mine. Perhaps in another year we can try again.

A another year!? Has everybody forgotten that people were kidnapped!? They don't have a year! Sensei, we have to do something now! You weren't there, Sensei. You didn’t see the way that girl looked into my eyes. She was scared and she's counting on me- I mean us- to save her.

[Splinters turns to stare at the black-and-white picture of himself, his wife Tang Shen, and their infant daughter Miwa]

Yes. You must save her.

I agree, Sensei, but in that fight we weren't actually a well-oiled machine.

Like that robot with the brain thingy.

Raph

Give it a rest.

View quote →

TThe Turtles

Whoa.

So that's the...

...Mutagen that turned us all into what we are now.

Let's drink some!

Raph

What!? Why would you do that!?

'Cause if you mutate a mutant, you get a super mutant!

Or a pile of goo on the sidewalk.

Raph

Either way, it's an improvement.

Guys, this is huge. Whoever kidnapped those people are somehow connected to what happened to us 15 years ago.

View quote →

Raph

[to his pet turtle Spike] I know you're a little worried about me. Look, I'm not gonna lie to you. We've never gone into a fight like this, and I don't know what's gonna happen. But you don't have to worry. I will make it back. I love you, man.

[Raph then turns around in shock to see Mikey, who has heard his every word.]

Awww. Are you talking to your pet turtle?

Raph

No! Shut up!

That's adorable!

Raph

Oh, I'm gonna crush you! [chases Mikey with a wooden spoon] I'm gonna shellac you!

View quote →

There's so much riding on this. What if something goes wrong?

Failure is a possibility all leaders must face, Leonardo. It is something I had to face in Japan during my battle with my old enemy, the Shredder. Years ago, Oroku Saki, as Shredder was called then, had been my friend. But the love of a woman came between us. He could not accept it and his jealously turned outward in a vengeful attack. And although he could not defeat me that day, my world burned and crumbled around me, as the battle took the life of my beloved Tang Shen. And I lost my baby daughter, Miwa.

But that's my point, Sensei. You lost everything.

I lost many things - my family, my home, my name. But I gained many things as well, like the 4 of you.

Don't worry. We can handle this. [Just then, Mikey runs by with a metal pot on his head, screaming. Raph is still chasing him with a wooden spoon.]

Raph

[angrily-ish] GET BACK HERE! [Leo and Splinter sigh.]

View quote →

[clearly not liking what he just heard] Not only did Raphael alert the Kraang, but you got caught... [glares at Raph] on video!

Raph

[defensively] Sensei, he was the angriest, nastiest guy you ever met!

Except for you. [Raph slaps him] Ow!

Raph

You should've heard the insults this guy was throwing at us. They were so... insulting!

[sarcastically; not buying this excuse] Oh, I did not realize he said mean things. Of course, you had no choice but to jeopardize your mission!

[mockingly] Burn. [Raph grits his teeth]

You are ninjas. You work in the shadows, in secret. This becomes difficult if there is proof of your existence in high definition!

Raph

[trying to talk his way out of it] Look, we know where this guy lives. All we need to do is find him and shake him until the tape pops out.

Oh, there's no tape. Video phones use flash memory and-- [Raph growls like a bulldog in annoyance]

Anger is self-destructive.

Raphael

[side commenting disrespectfully] I always thought it was... others-destructive.

[sternly; fed up with Raph's attitude and disrespect] Raphael! Stand up.

Somebody's in trouble~...

View quote →

Raph

Who does Leo think he is? So what if I got a temper? I’m still the best fighter we’ve got. In fact, if anything, my anger makes me a better fighter. You understand me, don't you, Spike? Chew on your leaf if you understand me. [Spike chews on leaf] Yeah, I thought so.

[suddenly walks in] I understand you too.

Raph

[scared out of his wits] Seriously, you gotta knock or something!

Raphael, let me tell you a story.

Raph

[tiredly] Sensei, I'm not really in the mood for a story.

Spike, chew on your leaf if you're in the mood for a story. [Spike chews on his leaf] Very well. When I was a young man, I fell in love with a woman.

Raph

[sarcastically; pretending to check the time] Oh, hey, is it that late already? [tries to leave]

[firmly] Sit! [Raph sits down in defeat and he continues] Her name was Tang Shen, and I was not the only one who loved her. There was another man competing for her attention, Oroku Saki.

Raph

Shredder.

One day, he insulted me in front of her. He called me many things. I felt I couldn't let those insults go unanswered. I lost my temper, and over time, our rivalry festered into hatred. Until Shredder sought to finish me. And I lost my beloved Tang Shen.

Raph

[lost for words; unsure of how to react] But... But it wasn't your fault. Shredder insulted you, you... You had no choice.

[through gritted teeth] "No choice"? I could have chosen to ignore him, I could have chosen to let his words wash over me, like a river over stone. [shamefully] But I let him anger me, it was I who made his words into weapons. That's the choice I made. What choice will you make?

View quote →

[Mikey starts to approach the apartment.]

What are you doing?

Whoa, hey!

Raph

Mikey, wait!

What? I'm returning Mittens to her owner.

Raph

Are you an idiot? Wait, let me rephrase that. You're an idiot!

You can't show yourself to a human.

Why not?

Because they'll freak the heck out, that's why not.

No they won't. I'm not so scary.

Raph

You're an ugly, green mutant armed with ninja weapons.

Look, this guy is gonna see that I'm just a regular cat-loving dude like him. The next thing you know, we'll be best buds! This is gonna be awesome! [jumps down, despite his brother's protests, to the owner of the cat's balcony]

Hi! Here's your--

COCat Owner

[screams in horror] Ugly, green mutant freak!

But I got your cat!

COCat Owner

Help! He's got my cat!

View quote →

[Splinter sees Leo sweep Raph, giving him a flashback to when Shredder used that move on him. Cut back to reality]

Where did you learn that!?

Mikey learned it from his new friend.

The man who taught him that kata is no friend! It comes from the Shredder.

Shredder?

You mean Bradford is one of his students?

He must be!

So Bradford's just pretending to be Mikey's friend to get to you!

Raph

Oh, man. Everything makes sense again. [then realizes] Mikey's in trouble!

View quote →

[in disbelief] How many times have I told you not to skateboard in the lair?!

Michelangelo

[missing the point] None, Sensei.

[annoyed] I shouldn't have to tell you!

(As they get up) You're right, Sensei. We definitely should have known better—

(The Turtles glare at Mikey before bowing their heads in disappointment)

(Disappointed) —and we deserve to be punished. Eh, some.

(Sternly gets up in Leo's face while stroking his thin beard) And what do you think would be a fitting punishment?

(Nervous, looking at his brothers, who whistle innocently) Well, uh, we… we should clean up our mess? [Splinter folds his arms] And then.... think about what we did.

TTurtles

(Muttering quickly together) Yeah. Sounds about right. We were wrong. Wouldn't want to do too much. No worries.

(Testing them) What about being grounded for a week?

(Hesitant) Oh, I'm not sure that's-

(Quickly trying to escape it) I'm cool with the thinking.

(Anxious) Really, that's not necessary.

Raph

(Dismissive) Maybe next time.

(Angry) YOU'RE GROUNDED FOR A WEEK!

(The Turtles groan in defeat as the skateboard ramp collapses behind them, leaving an even bigger mess.)

View quote →

And where have you been?

Raph

Nowhere?

How did you get so hurt?

Oh, that. Well, uh, we were...

Raph

Hit...

By a...

Bus?

[whispers to Mikey] Hit by a bus?!

Well, what was I supposed to say, meteor, cow, flying building?!

View quote →

Excuse me, Sensei, but ninjas never had to go up against guys in armor. [sees paintings, corrects himself] Oh, I mean ninjas always had to go up against guys in armor.

Raph

Nice save.

Sensei, what was their secret?

They understood that you do not fight the armor, you fight the man inside.

[Turtles stare at him who looks at them] Why are we all looking at each other?

View quote →

BOOYAKASHA!

Sounds weird when he says it.

Raph

Sounds weird when YOU say it.

View quote →

Nice job, bro!

Way to go, Donnie.

Raph

Yeah, not bad, except for that part where you built the thing in the first place, and the part where it broke, and the part where it tried to kill us, and the part-

[exasperated] Okay, I get it!