There you go. Enjoy your– Say, you're not a robot, are you?
CCustomer
No...I'm not.
Well, keep your eyes peeled. They're everywhere. Back to work!
“Krab Borg” · Season 3
In this episode: Abrasive SpongeBob (5), Squidward (3), Mr. Krabs (3), Krabs (1)
If I didn't know better, I'd say he was... a robot.
Mr.-
[puts his hand over SpongeBob's mouth] Will you quiet up? Now listen, what did these robots in the movie look like?
Well, they had piercing red eyes, metal pinchers for hands, and they ran on batteries.
Okay, so tell me, does Mr. Krabs look anything like that?!
[Mr. Krabs barges out of his office, still screaming. He now has burning red eyes, the pair of tongs snipping in his claw, and the batteries in his pocket, just like the robot in the movie and Squidward said. SpongeBob and Squidward both scream in fear. Mr. Krabs continues screaming as he runs into the bathroom]
I'll evacuate the customers, you call the navy!
[runs over to the phone] Hello, Operator? Get me the Navy!
OOperator
Hello, you've reached the Navy's automated phone service.
Squidward, the robots are running the Navy!
NOT THE NAVY! [on the microphone] Attention, Krusty Krab! Run for your lives! Robots are taking over the world! [pause] OUR WORLD! [Then the customers run and scream in panic] What do we do now?
I don't know! [notices a nickel] Hey, a nickel! [points at it]
SpongeBob.
Sorry.
[walks out of the bathroom, his eyes back to normal] Ah, that's better. [walks back to his office] Bee-boo-boo-boo-bee-bop, boo-boo-bop.
We need to find out what that robot did with the real Mr. Krabs, but how?
Well, in the movie the hero teams up with a buddy, and they get the poop on the robot.
They poop on the robot?
Yeah, you know, they get the straight poop, ask questions, get information.
I never thought I'd say this, but, SpongeBob, let's get that poop!
[Squidward and SpongeBob dive in. SpongeBob grabs rope, Squidward grabs tools, and SpongeBob grabs records]
Oh, hello, boys. What can I do for ya? [they both lock the door] Hehe, why did you lock the door? Why do you have that rope? WHO'S WATCHING THE CASH REGISTER?! [gets attacked] SpongeBob, Squidward, what’s the meaning of this?! Unite me this instant!
[SpongeBob runs up to Mr. Krabs and then slaps him]
SpongeBob, you gotta ask him a question first.
Oh, yeah. What color is my underwear? [slaps him again]
SpongeBob, let me handle this. [turns a light on Mr. Krabs] Where's Mr. Krabs?
[confused] What are you talking about? I'm Mr. Krabs.
[slaps Mr. Krabs again] We can do this all night if you want. Where's Mr. Krabs?
I'm Mr. Krabs!
Where's Mr. Krabs?
KKrabs
I'm Mr. Krabs!
Where's Mr. Krabs?
I am Mr. Krabs! I am! I am! I am! I am! I am! I am! I am!
This is one stubborn robot.
[confused for a moment, he finally blows his lid, yelling so loudly he causes SpongeBob and a nearby lamp to fall from the force] WHAT?! YOU THINK I'M A ROBOT?!
We don't think; we know.
That's the silliest thing I ever heard! I AM MR. KRABS!
SpongeBob, how did that movie of yours end?
The movie? Oh! Yeah! The ending was great! Turns out, there weren't any robots after all! It was just their imagination. Hey, it's time to feed Gary! [bolts right out of the Krusty Krab]
[glares at Squidward lividly as he nervously begins sweeping up all the devices] GRRRRRRR... SQUIDWARD!!!!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's SpongeBob SquarePants pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.