Sheila, Kyle and others in “It's a Jersey Thing”

Sheila

I know this has to be very upsetting for you, Kyle.

Kyle

[enunciating] What am I, Mom?

Sheila

When I got pregnant with you, Kyle, your father and I were living with my parents in Newark. We knew we had to get out. Neither of us wanted our child to be from Jersey, so we moved. As far away as we could. But now I realize you can take the fetus out of Jersey, but you can't take Jersey out of the fetus.

Kyle

[getting scared] What are you saying?!

Sheila

I'm saying that for the first two months I carried you in my stomach, I lived in Newark. Technically, you are from Jersey.

Kyle

[looks at his new look] NO! I don't wanna look like this!

Sheila

It isn't so bad, Kyle. A lot of people think the Jersey look is nice.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! [faints on his back]

Kyle

I can hide it! [hops off the bed] Nobody ever has to know! [puts his hat back on and walks out the bedroom door] I can't ever let anybody know!