Lee Stetson quotes from Scarecrow and Mrs. King

Francine

Ooh, Amanda, dear, is that why you're busy tonight? Very busy, apparently, hmm?

Lee

Amanda, do you know what that is?

'Amanda

Yes, it's a, um, it's a friendship ring.

Lee

No, it's a Concubine ring.

Amanda

No, it isn't, it's a friendship ring.

Lee

It's a Concubine ring, there's a whole collection of them in the Topkapi Museum, I know that for a fact.

Amanda

Yes, I know that, I know that. I know that. It's a friendship ring. It was given to me by a friend, and therefore it is . . . simply . . . a friendship ring.

Francine

Okay. Sure. Friendship.

Billy

Nobody's blaming you, Amanda. The Dodger's a very sharp operator. How did he arrange to meet you?

Amanda

He didn't. I mean, I don't think he did. His car stalled behind mine when I was shopping

Lee

I don't believe this. I don't believe it.

Amanda

Well, anyway, so we got out and we were talking while we waited for the car club and he seemed nice and friendly and...

Lee

Oh, yeah, and he picked you up.

Amanda

He did not pick me up!

Billy

He did not give you a phone number?

Amanda

No, he didn't give me a phone number, he always called me.

Lee

And that didn't tip you off? Oh, come on, Amanda, married guys and weirdos. They don't give you phone numbers.

Amanda

Would you like a straw?

Lee

Uh, no. No, a straw wouldn't look right with soup.

Lee

Hey, come on, Amanda, look. You're going to be all right. You're protected by the best there is in the business.

Amanda

I don't want the best there is, I want you.

Lee

Oh.

Amanda

I'm sorry, that didn't come out the way that I meant it.

Lee

Oh, thanks a lot.

Francine

What happened to you?

Amanda

I was mugged.

Lee

You were what?!

Amanda

I was mugged. In the middle of the street, broad daylight.

Lee

That's terrible!

Francine

That's funny. You know, the same thing happened to me just last week. I was outside the airport making a surveillance pass and all of a sudden I felt this big arm lock around my neck from behind.

Amanda

What did you do?

Francine

Oh, I spiked his instep with my heel, thumbed his eyesockets, pressed my forearm against his larynx, and then brought up my knee in a lifting motion.

Amanda

I just screamed.

Francine

Hm. So did he.

Lee

What are you looking for?

Amanda

My room.

Lee

This is your room.

Amanda

Then where is your room?

Lee

It's also my room. It's our room.

Amanda

Oh no

Lee

Are you okay?

Amanda

Yes, I’ve never seen Trafalgar Square before, it’d help if I could move around a bit.

Lee

If you move around he could kill you.

Amanda

Well there’s a lot to see from here too.

Amanda

Oh, thank heavens -- you're okay!

Lee

I will be when you get off my arm.

Amanda

So it’s called good guy/bad guy?

Lee

Right, one guy questions the suspect meanwhile the other guy plays nice as a buffer to the mean guy.

Amanda

Which side is the good guy on?

Lee

The bad guys.

Amanda

But he’s really good?

Lee

Right.

Amanda

Then who’s really bad?

Lee

The bad guy – ah the suspect, got it?

Amanda

Sure but it’s too complicated, I think maybe I should just talk to Conrad he always used to confide in me, he even told me once that he wears his undershorts inside out so that the seams wouldn’t scratch him.

Lee

Hmm well – underwear is not on the schedule today could we please try to stick to the proven technique?

Amanda

Right good guy/bad guy – Ah Lee, it makes me feel just awful when I have to shout at the boys so I think I should probably be the good guy and if you don’t mind you should be the bad guy

Lee

Good Idea.

Amanda

Ok what’s the matter? That’s as good a good guy as I can be.

Lee

Mother Theresa was never that good.

Amanda

I think we should both be the good guy.

Lee

Oh come on there’s no such thing as good guy/good guyǃ

Amanda

She must be worried sick, I didn’t come home all last night.

Lee

Yeah I know that.

Amanda

I didn’t even call.

Lee

Tell her you were tied up.

Amanda

Lee, I want you to know that I’m not at all worried because I know that you’re a highly trained professional agent and I’m sure you have some kind of plan to get us out of here... don’t you?

Lee

Not at the moment.

Amanda

No plan?

Lee

No.

Amanda

I’m very sorry to hear that.

Lee

If worse comes to worse we’ll give you a new identity and move you to a new part of the country.

Amanda

Oh no! Not in the middle of the school year.

Amanda

I think I’ve figured out what Mrs Farnsworth was trying to tell me, I mean tell you... tell you through me

Lee

It scares me to admit it, but I think I followed that.