[Lyrics to the The Rimmer Song in The Rimmer Experience:]
He's Arnold, Arnold, Arnold Rimmer,
More reliable than a garden strimmer,
He's never been mistaken for Yul Brynner;
He's not bald, and his head doesn't glimmer.
“Blue”
In this episode: Kryten (3), Dave Lister (2), The Cat (1), Kochanski (1)
Master of the wit and the repartee,
His command of space directives is uncanny.
How come he's such a genius? Don't ask me!
Ask Arnold, Arnold, Arnold Rimmer.
He's also a fantastic swimmer,
And if you play your cards right,
Then he just might come round for dinner.
[about Kochanski] And another thing is that she keeps her pants in her sock drawer! Do you know how time-consuming that can be to put it all back?
You mean you've seen her pants?
Do you think I like living in this big skip with thrusters? Do you think I even enjoy breathing in on this ship?! And to top it all off, I am faced with a neurotic droid who is completely obsessed with my pants drawer!
You mean I'm not alone? Oh, I see. You mean me.
I'm losing it, man, otherwise I'd never be thinking stuff like that. Kissing Rimmer? I'd rather be bobbing for apples at the Reading festival!
[about Rimmer] I never wanna see or hear from that scum sucking, lying, weasel minded smeghead in my entire life.
Sigmund Freud, eat your heart out.
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