[Bob and Enzo walk into diner] Where have you two been?!
EEnzo
We just stopped off to do a little circuit racing on our way back from school.
"Circuit racing?" That wasn't on the schedule.
Aw, come on, Dot, It doesn't hurt for Enzo to have a little fun.
EEnzo
You remember FUN, don't you, Dot?
Doesn't hurt?! Bob, I was supposed to take Enzo to his ancient language class milliseconds ago! Now we're so late that my entire schedule is offline!
Oh, Dot, you have your whole life planned out. Why, you probably know where you're going to be at ten-thousand-thirty.
That would be the input-output conference in Sector One.
See, you've gotta take time to smell the daisy wheels.
I'd love to, Bob. But right now, Enzo and I are late.
EEnzo
Ancient languages? Mega-boring! COBOL, FORTRAN? They're dinosaurs!
Well, they may be dinosaurs, Enzo, But you never know when they might come in handy! It's always better to be prepared!
That's your problem, Dot. You need to be more like me. Taking things as they come. Learning to do things on the fly! Livin' on the edge!
Problem?! Are you saying I have a problem?!
Yeah, I guess I am, all those plans and schedules. They're not good for a little kid! What are you trying to do, huh? Turn poor Enzo into YOU? Totally pre-programmed?
[Sputters] Pre-programmed?! [Enzo stifles snicker] Well, at least he won't be as inconsiderate and random as some people!
EEnzo
Guys, guys! Chill, will ya?!
Nah, it's okay, Enzo, If your big sister feels she knows it all, Far be it from ME to get in her way!
Hmph! Now you're talking!
Well, Dot, Then why don't you put THIS on your schedule? I'll kiss a NULL before I step into THIS place again!
[An advisory hearing before Phong]
B1Binome 1
It's just awful. Those two are gonna crash us all.
B2Binome 2
Copy and paste that!
N7Numerical 7
We gotta do something!
EEnzo
Dot won't talk to Bob. Bob won't talk to Dot. What can we do?!
[Jumps on Phong's desk] Bob and Dot, Dot and Bob! May lay and Mainframe! When will it end?! Will Bob give up?! Will Bob flee to the supercomputer?!
FBFemale binome
Leave Mainframe?!
B3Binome 3
Super computer?!
[Mike the TV jumps off desk] Calmness, everyone. Now listen. It is said that broken friendship is best mended by tragedy or apology.
EEnzo
Wow, alphanumeric. Deep. What do you mean exactly, Phong?
I have no idea, child. But you must ponder my words.
EEnzo
Tragedy or apology. Hmm. Dude. That might actually work.
[Arrives late with Bob to rescue Enzo from a conveyor belt onto being recycled] Enzo, are you okay?!
EEnzo
[Frisket holds up Enzo in mouth] No thanks to you two!
Well, I would've been here sooner if your sister wasn't such a-
Me?! If you weren't such so basic, so low density-
Oh, it's always me now, isn't it?! You're the basic one, don't call me basic. I think you're about as basic as it comes. I mean, when I look up basic in the dictionary, it's you that I see Dot. [Dot punches him in face']
EEnzo
[From behind tree] Look, they're talking.
EEnzo
Finally, thank you, Phong.
[Announcer alerts to incoming game]
Uh, oh, a game. But I'm not worried Bob. I'm with you and you're the best.
Hey, you're no hack yourself, Dot. No game could stop a team like us.
Yeah, it's like you said in your card. There's nothing we can't do together.
Well, you know, the sweet holomark you sent to apologize for being such a creep.
Me?! Apologize to you?! Why in the motherboard would I do something like that?! [Presses shirt button] Reboot! [Changes into costume]
Possibly because you were acting like such a dip switch! [Presses shirt button] Reboot! [Changes into costume]
You were the one who said you were sorry!
What do you mean, they're offline?!
CChief
[Via Vid Window] All of them, the com-net, the vid-net, the ethernet, they're all down, already 12 blocks! I was talking to another precinct chief on level two, and she just-- [loses contact]
Chief?! Come in! Chief! Phong, something's wrong! The whole Kits Sector is going offline, one block at a time!
Yes, child, I know, my links have blacked out as well! It started at the docks!
I will do what I can from here! Please, be most careful!
EEnzo
Would everybody just chill? Remember? Bob's apartment is in Kits! Whatever's happening there, I'm sure he's on top of it!
Multitasking ze large parties... ZIZ is what I hate!
B1Binome 1
Bob, tell us again how you beat the User!
B2Binome 2
Yeah! Download us, Bob!
Well, I just spotted his weak sector, calculated the angle, and fired!
B3Binome 3
And POW! Blasted to bytes!
B4Binome 4
Yeah! Offlined! Deleted!
B5Binome 5
Woo-hoo-hoo-hoo!
What's with Enzo? Is he fully functional?
He's been like that since the Game ended.
EEnzo
I couldn't figure out how to beat that User... I must be Basic.
Basic?! Whoa, Don't be so rough on yourself!
Aw, you're just a little kid, Enzo. You'll get better as you develop.
Yeah, don't worry about it. It'll all come in time.
EEnzo
Time! Hah! Little kid?! Hmph! I don't wanna be smart later, I wanna be smart NOW!
Perhaps you will try later, my son. As you know, I can only download wisdom to those who beat me at my game.
EEnzo
Of course I'd lose, I'm as Basic as Basic can get! I'm low-res, downsized, erasable, hardly worth a backup! Someone should undo me, and--
[Sighs] Come. You did not win my game, but maybe I can help anyway. I'm not supposed to let anyone, I mean, ANYONE in here... but, if you promise not to touch ANYTHING... I will show you something.
EEnzo
Really?! Alphanumeric! I promise!
[Sighs] "YADDA-YADDA-YADDA."
EEnzo
Whoa! Double-sided! Super-cooled! The city's Read-Only room. A storehouse of all information since the very beginning of Mainframe. Whoa! Pixelatious!
And my favourite way to become smarter, by reading. If you promise not to touch anything, other than this window, you may stay in this room, and scan the files in memory.
EEnzo
Okay, cool! I wanna scan every README file in the system.
NNotifier
Processing request.
When you finish, just come out this door. Be careful, young Enzo. Remember, that anything worthwhile takes time.
EEnzo
Yeah, but the faster I go, the more I'll know. Thanks, Phong! I'll show 'em how smart I am... I'll store every byte of data in here!
In the first series of events, The athletes will rack up as many points as they can! The more, the better! But wait, there's more! These scores determine the starting positions in the winner-take-all final event, THE ELIMINATOR! Whoever wins the Eliminator, wins the Game! But now, another word from our sponsor...!
EEnzo
Did you hear that?! We've gotta score as many points as possible! Or we're all... [gulp] wiped out!
Don't worry, coach! I will help you win!
Ahem... Uh, there's just one thing...
EEnzo
AAAAAAGH! We're all gonna be nullified!
IT SLICES! DICES! Cuts! Copies! Pastes! And even formats julienne fries! But wait there's more: act now and we'll port you the handy log-o-matic absolutely free for only 99.99.99!
Ahhh! Mike! For the 128 time, stop!
EEnzo
Can't we just turn him off?
I can't. His remote control ran away.
It's Bucket-o-nothing! Surprise your friends, amaze your family, annoy perfect strangers! Free for only $99.99.99!
That's it! You're getting dismantled! Glitch, screwdriver. [Mike screams away]
What?! A Thief?! I'm not the warrior? Haha. Ha. I'm always a warrior.
EEnzo
Well, if you're not the warrior, but, who is?
Dun da da DUUUUUUUNNNNN...! Mike The Mighty Warrior! Tonight at 8.
[Bob looks at Mike]] This is bad. Very bad!
EEnzo
I don't it's like I lost total control of my body! It was kind of cool!
I don't like this at all.
Me either, come on, let's take him to see Phong.
[At Phong's office]
A most intriguing tale. Dancing on Al's counter you say? It reminds me of an old fie my parents used to tell me. It concerned a sprite who went a little random one upgrade. He had this very long beard.
Uh, Phong, maybe you could perform some tests, to figure out what's wrong?
Ah, yes. A wise idea my son. Hmm. [Grabs Enzo's head and rams an otoscope into Enzo's ear and peers in]
Hack and Slash are inside of Enzo's head!
Oh, yes. And it seems they are in the process of taking over Enzo's brain! Although for what purpose, I cannot be sure.
Well, we have to get them out! We have to do something.
Do you have a data compression command?
[Mouse, Hack and Slash have entered Enzo’s head by mistake, and he is spouting random quotes as a result of tampering with his nerve endings]
EEnzo
I’m sorry, Mrs. Dithers. My dog ate my homework. Slingshot? What slingshot?
EEnzo
I don’t know, my life is reminding before my eyes. [Has another spasm] BASIC?! I know you are, but what am I?
ReBoot · 215 quotes
