Private Practice quotes

Why is there a letter of resignation on my desk?

Addison

I told you. I got a job offer.

I don't want to hear this again. Working at a private medical co-op, moving to L.A.? This is not my Addison. My Addison is a world-class neonatal surgeon.

Violet

You'll have Dell.

Naomi

He's studying to be a midwife.

Addison

The cute boy who answers the phone?

Addison

I want to hear you say it out loud.

Pete

You didn't move down here because I kissed you.

Addison

[walks away] Thank you.

Pete

You so moved down here because I kissed you.

Addison

(to herself) I heard that!

Violet

Look, I know she has the largest chunk in this practice, but we agreed to equal votes. We are supposed to vote! Sam, you ought to do something!

Sam

What, me?

Violet

This divorce is killing us! You need to go apologize.

Pete

Just say you were wrong for walking out, so we can go back to being a happy family.

Violet

Yeah!

Sam

I never... I didn't... I am not apologizing to her. She's the one.... Naomi hires Addison and then moves her in right next door to me. I saw her naked this morning.

Cooper

You saw her naked?

Pete

Did she look good naked?

Focus!

Cooper

(to Addison) Do you think there's something wrong with having sex with a woman who wants you to call her... mama?

Cooper

We're a team.

Violet

We're partners, Naomi.

Sam

You can't just bring somebody in.

Pete

Without asking us.

Violet

Yeah.

Sam

We're a democracy. We vote.

Pete

We vote.

Violet

We vote or it doesn't happen.

Naomi

You're right. We should've voted. I was wrong.

Violet

Good. Okay, let's vote.

Addison

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold on a minute. Uh, I have been working here less than 24 hours, and in that time I discovered that I not welcome here, I learned I am a one-man gynie show, and I performed crazy McGyver surgery, and...Sam saw my booty. So...this has not been a great day for me. This day kind of sucked. But you know what I had one patient...one patient the entire day...and I loved it. So you want me gone? Too bad. I'm in. I'm putting my foot down. My foot's down. It's down. I'm not going anywhere. So...yeah. I thought I...I thought I had a big finish but...I don't. So...I'm done. No, no. I do have a big finish. If I hadn't been here today, if you'd had someone else, that girl would've died delivering her baby. I saved her life. I saved your asses. I'm a world-class neonatal surgeon. And I'm here to stay. Welcome to the new Oceanside Wellness.(Addison leaves)

Naomi

That's why I didn't tell you she was coming.

Pete

Addison is mad at me because Cooper hired a stripper.

Violet

I'm ignoring the stripper. Today is a day for ignoring things. I am all business today.

Pete

God. I am a wreck. Long day.

Addison

I just sent a man to jail for trying to get rid of his own kid, but... your day sounds really hard.

Pete

I didn't know.

Addison

Oh, no. Of course not. You spent the entire day dealing with the perils of aromatherapy and uh... your stripper.

Pete

I know you don't believe me, but I like my women real. Real skin, real breasts, real lines around their eyes that mean that they've really lived and had pain. You show me that woman, and I'm interested... and not in a slippery way. [gets up to leave, but stops] And, Addison... I think it's great that you try to take care of Naomi, but who takes care of you?

Addison

I don't even know if he's normal. One minute he's hot, the next minute he's arctic; I don't need that kind of damage, no matter how fancy his lips are; here he comes.

Addison

You know this is a very serious issue. This is a woman who has needs, who has wants, who needs and wants magic in her life. This is not a dirty little joke that you can make your dirty little jokes about, dirty man.

Pete

You don't know me at all. You think you do, but you don't, so don't call me names.

Cooper

Violet! Step away from the pee-pee!

Addison

[soaking wet] It rains in Seattle which is where I left my umbrella! It does not rain in Los Angeles!

Dell

It rains in LA, it's raining right now.

Addison

Really? Right now!

Addison

Why has nobody, including you, responded to my invitation tonight? I invited everyone from work to my home over a week ago, a week...

Sam

Addison, I live three feet away from your new home, If you have a party, I'm going to be there even if I don't want to be.

Addison

What a delightful acceptance.

Dell

Did I mention I'm a total whiz at the female anatomy? I-I-I'm acing my midwifery classes. I got it all up here.

Addison

Yeah, yeah, keep it up there.

Dell

[shouting in a room filled with patients] Vulva! Labium majus!

Sam

If that's flirting, you need new skills.

Pete

I barely notice your incredible breasts or your cellulite-free thighs because your brain is such an immense turn-on to a man as highly evolved as I am.