Pete Wilder quotes from Private Practice

Pete

I barely notice your incredible breasts or your cellulite-free thighs because your brain is such an immense turn-on to a man as highly evolved as I am.

Addison

I want to hear you say it out loud.

Pete

You didn't move down here because I kissed you.

Addison

[walks away] Thank you.

Pete

You so moved down here because I kissed you.

Addison

(to herself) I heard that!

Violet

Look, I know she has the largest chunk in this practice, but we agreed to equal votes. We are supposed to vote! Sam, you ought to do something!

Sam

What, me?

Violet

This divorce is killing us! You need to go apologize.

Pete

Just say you were wrong for walking out, so we can go back to being a happy family.

Violet

Yeah!

Sam

I never... I didn't... I am not apologizing to her. She's the one.... Naomi hires Addison and then moves her in right next door to me. I saw her naked this morning.

Cooper

You saw her naked?

Pete

Did she look good naked?

Focus!

Cooper

We're a team.

Violet

We're partners, Naomi.

Sam

You can't just bring somebody in.

Pete

Without asking us.

Violet

Yeah.

Sam

We're a democracy. We vote.

Pete

We vote.

Violet

We vote or it doesn't happen.

Naomi

You're right. We should've voted. I was wrong.

Violet

Good. Okay, let's vote.

Addison

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold on a minute. Uh, I have been working here less than 24 hours, and in that time I discovered that I not welcome here, I learned I am a one-man gynie show, and I performed crazy McGyver surgery, and...Sam saw my booty. So...this has not been a great day for me. This day kind of sucked. But you know what I had one patient...one patient the entire day...and I loved it. So you want me gone? Too bad. I'm in. I'm putting my foot down. My foot's down. It's down. I'm not going anywhere. So...yeah. I thought I...I thought I had a big finish but...I don't. So...I'm done. No, no. I do have a big finish. If I hadn't been here today, if you'd had someone else, that girl would've died delivering her baby. I saved her life. I saved your asses. I'm a world-class neonatal surgeon. And I'm here to stay. Welcome to the new Oceanside Wellness.(Addison leaves)

Naomi

That's why I didn't tell you she was coming.

Pete

Addison is mad at me because Cooper hired a stripper.

Violet

I'm ignoring the stripper. Today is a day for ignoring things. I am all business today.

Pete

God. I am a wreck. Long day.

Addison

I just sent a man to jail for trying to get rid of his own kid, but... your day sounds really hard.

Pete

I didn't know.

Addison

Oh, no. Of course not. You spent the entire day dealing with the perils of aromatherapy and uh... your stripper.

Pete

I know you don't believe me, but I like my women real. Real skin, real breasts, real lines around their eyes that mean that they've really lived and had pain. You show me that woman, and I'm interested... and not in a slippery way. [gets up to leave, but stops] And, Addison... I think it's great that you try to take care of Naomi, but who takes care of you?

Addison

You know this is a very serious issue. This is a woman who has needs, who has wants, who needs and wants magic in her life. This is not a dirty little joke that you can make your dirty little jokes about, dirty man.

Pete

You don't know me at all. You think you do, but you don't, so don't call me names.

Pete

She snores...

Naomi

God, asleep, she looks almost harmless.

Addison

Hm, like a sleeping tiger.

Pete

Shh. Don't wake the tiger.

Cooper

Who kicked your dog?

Pete

I think I'm helping some other guy win over Addison.

Cooper

Good job.

Pete

It'd be weird to punch him out now, right?

Cooper

Yeah, a little bit.

Pete

[explaining a procedure to Jodie, the temp] Actually, the treatment is preformed on the whole body, adapted for skin sensitivity of each individual, so-

Violet

[scoffs] This place is bad enough without you trying to sell your magic beans to everyone. I mean, does she really look like she needs help? Does that body need... anything? I mean, does any body really need its fat pulverized into submission?

Pete

Violet, Violet, you know what you are? You are a... a judger. You're a judgy judger who has no right to judge until she tries it for herself.

Pete

Do you think I'm old?

Addison

Tell me you did not sleep with that temp. [laughs] You slept with Jodie the temp.

Pete

Hey, it seemed like a good idea at the time.

Addison

Yeah, well, at least you're getting out there. Me? Two dates seems to be my limit.

Pete

The cop?

Addison

He didn't call after our last date, so I called him, left him a message, a horrifying, embarrassing message. Probably scared him off. Not that I care. You know, I'm glad to not be talking to him.

Pete

Well, at least he didn't tell you you were old. Although... she did say that I was great.

Pete

[to Addison] You want my advice?

Addison

Please.

Pete

Ignore all advice.

Violet

Okay, look, um, Pete, Sheldon, I'm um... I'm sleeping with both of you. I thought it was okay, but it's not. I realize that I, um, you... you can't do that. I can't do that, and, um, and I'm sorry.

Pete

Who are you? [leaves]

Violet

He's right. I'm a mess.

Sheldon

We're all a mess, don't you know that by now? All I know is, I don't mind finding out... who you are.

Pete

We've made a decision.

Violet

Together?

Sheldon

Paternity test. Now.

Pete

One of us gets out of your hair, the other one... has a right to know.

Cooper

Look guys...

Pete

Know what, Cooper? You moved in, you pushed us out, you claimed your territory, but one thing is clear. This kid you're talking to, is not your kid, so, stay out of it.

Violet

Look, Pete...

Sheldon

The answer is right there for us to know.

Pete

We know that you don't want to face it, but we do.

Addison

[to Violet] Where's Katie?

Violet

She's still in the birthing suite. She needs some space. I'm afraid I'm not going to get through. She's in there staring at my belly. I represent everything she wants. She hates me for it.

Pete

She doesn't hate you. She just wants something she can't have and that's hard.