Spike quotes from Press Gang

Lynda

I was just going up these stairs.

Colin

Right.

Lynda

No particular reason.

Colin

You said.

Lynda

Well, I'll just go up them, then.

Lynda

Me neither.

Spike

Is that right?

Lynda

What a coincidence?

Spike

It's just amazing!

Colin

Look, would you both mind? You're both very cute and everything, I mean if you're selling the film rights to this little romance, I'm in, but just at the moment I really don't want to listen to it.

Why does everyone always ignore me?

Spike

Who said that?

Lynda

Do we have to involve the entire newsroom in any little fight we have?

Spike

I don't know. Shall we take a vote?

Spike

You want me to find Kenny for you?

Colin

You know where he is?

Spike

I could guess who he's with. Next best thing.

Spike

Is Kenny ever wrong about anything?

Lynda

I know someone who says they saw it happen but I think they were just talking big.

Spike

Know what that woman's done to me?

Dated you, dumped you, broken your heart, driven you back to America, and given you a serious hang-up about all other women because you know you're basically still crazy about her and always will be.

Spike

Lucky guess.

Did I miss anything?

Spike

She stole my damn passport.

Kenny

I’ve just met someone I really like. Is it too soon to steal her passport?

Spike

You know about that?

Kenny

Spike, it’s Kenny.

Colin

Spike, baby. I didn't know you were back from Birmingham!

Spike

America, Colin. I went home to America.

Colin

No kidding - I thought you were from Birmingham.

Lynda

You and me Spike, we're held together by a force even stronger than true love.

Spike

Which is?

Lynda

We both want the last word.

Lynda

[to Spike] Well... you've got big lips!

Spike

Ha, is that the best you can do, "Big lips".

Lynda

Try this.

Lynda

If someone's in my toilet, I want to know what they're doing!

Spike

She has a passion for detail.