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S4

Mystery Science Theater 3000 · Season 4

Servo, Crow and others in “Manhunt in Space”

[during a host segment, the bots are performing a parody of General Hospital, each line punctuated by a sting organ noise]

[to Crow] Peggy, I'm afraid I have bad news for you.

Oh my God; what is it? Is it a hiatus hernia?

No, it's not that.

Is it the heartbreak of psoriasis?

No, it's not that.

Is it a Mo-No on the A-Go-Go?

No, I'm afraid it's far worse than that.

Please, Doc, tell me what it is!

Well, when you were walking down the hall earlier, the back of your hospital gown was open, and everyone could see your butt!

[crying] I'll never live down the shaaaaaaame!

You know, my dear... in tough situations like this in the past, patients found the best thing is to be comforted by me- Dr. Chad Feelgood.

Oh, Chad...

[enters as a nurse] You cad! I knew you were cheating on me!!

My dear, I can explain!

I hate you, I hate you, I hate you, I- [to Crow] Hey; nice butt!

[Crow breaks down in tears along with Gypsy]

I can comfort you, I can-

What's going on here?

Oh no; it's Joel Robinson! The hard-drinking, heavy-fisted, cantankerous yet lovable hospital Administrator!

No, I'm not!

Oh no, and he's suffering from amnesia!

You guys, listen: I'm not gonna play soap opera with you. When I was 9 years old, my sister made me play soap opera with her. I'm not gonna play soap opera. [Cambot continues playing the soap opera sting music] Okay Cambot, that's it. Alright... that's it! [unplugs Cambot in irritation] Who's next?!

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