CCrow
[observing the number 23 painted above the Creeper's hideout] Hey, it's KTMA!
“The Brute Man (movie)” · Season 7
In this episode: Crow T. Robot (6), Tom Servo (2), Mike Nelson (2), Jimmy (2)
[during a scene with a very agitated, elderly grocer and his assistant]
HMr. Haskins
[catching Jimmy listening to the radio] Jimmy!
Good morning, Mr. Haskins.
HMr. Haskins
Leave that radio alone. Sweep up the place. You're getting paid to work, not entertain yourself!
Okay... Hey, that Creeper guy murdered somebody again last night.
HMr. Haskins
Oh, murders, detectives, gangsters... that's all you think about! Get the broom.
SAServo [as Jimmy]
I think about sex, too!
[Haskins finds a grocery list]
MAMike [as Haskins]
"Eat me, you hateful old fossil. Signed, Jimmy-" HEY!
...
HMr. Haskins
[holding the grocery list] Where'd this come from?
Somebody stuck it under the door.
HMr. Haskins
[annoyed] Uhh...
CACrow [as Haskins]
I hate customers!
Don't you think it's kinda funny? Sticking a note under the door?
HMr. Haskins
No!
MAMike [as Haskins]
Go to hell!
HMr. Haskins
And don't go trying to make a mystery out of it!
CACrow [as Haskins]
Piss off! [Mike is starting to laugh out of character]
HMr. Haskins
Somebody's probably too busy to pick up the stuff.
Could be the Creeper.
HMr. Haskins
[packing a grocery bag in agitation] Creeper, Creeper, Creeper! You give ME the creeps!
Zinga!
Well he could be! That'd be a swell reason why he wouldn't want to see anybody, or come out, except at night.
HMr. Haskins
You just gotta deliver these groceries. And don't forget the money. A dollar and a quarter.
MAMike [as Jimmy]
Why'd you hire me if you hate me so...?
Okay... but I still think it might be-
HMr. Haskins
I know! So he's the Creeper. Now you just creep along with that- [stomps his foot down; Mike is starting to laugh uncontrollably] I MEAN HURRY UP WITH THAT STUFF!!! And then get back here and do the rest of your work!
CACrow [as Haskins]
Dear GOD, I HATE YOU!!! I hope you DIE!!!
[as Jimmy delivers the groceries to the Creeper's location]
MMoffet
[from behind a door] How much?
A dollar and a quarter.
[Moffet opens the door just enough to give Jimmy the money]
CACrow [as Moffet]
Here's a toenail.
[Mr. Haskins notices a headline on a paper, slowly getting concerned about Jimmy, who has not returned after two hours from delivering]
CACrow [as Haskins]
"God is Dead"? GOOD!
[while a police detective chain smokes multiple cigarettes outside a house]
Crow [as detective] Wow, these cigarettes are really addicting! I wonder if they know about that.
...
MAMike [as detective]
They should get kids going on these things!
...
CACrow [as detective]
[inhales] Aw man, I should have bought at least eight more cartons!
...
SAServo [as detective]
[inhales] Man, I just love these things!
CACrow [as detective]
[inhales] Ah, I love cigs. I gotta get a carton of these for my pregnant wife.
...
SAServo [as detective]
What I love, really, is that they're so good for you. [inhales]
...
DDetective
Good evening, Mr Scott.
CSClifford Scott
Hello. I'm sorry you have to stay out here.
DDetective
That's alright, sir, it's my job. Goodnight.
CACrow [as detective]
By the way, you mind if I smoke out here?
...
[after a gunshot is heard in the house]
DDetective
[trying to get into the house] Mr. Scott?! Mr. Scott?!
CACrow [as detective]
Do you have a cigarette?!
[The Creeper slowly climbs the ladder of a fire escape.]
CCrow
Ladies and gentlemen! In the center ring, the Creeper will now attempt the high...thing.
[Mike and Servo both crack up.]
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Mystery Science Theater 3000 pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.