RARadio Announcer
That was Episode Two of "The Death of Mary Queen of Scots", adapted for the radio by Bernard Hollowood and Brian London. And now, Radio Four will explode. [interval music plays until the radio suddenly combusts]
P1Pepperpot 1
We'll have to watch the telly then.
P1Pepperpot 1
Well, what's on the television then?
P2Pepperpot 2
Looks like a penguin.
P1Pepperpot 1
No, no, no, no! I didn't mean 'what's on the television set?' I meant 'what program?'
P2Pepperpot 2
Funny that penguin being there, innit? What's it doing there?
P2Pepperpot 2
I can see that!
P1Pepperpot 1
If it lays an egg, it'll fall down the back of the television set.
P2Pepperpot 2
We'll have to watch that. Unless it's a male.
P1Pepperpot 1
Ooh, I hadn't thought of that.
P2Pepperpot 2
Yes. Looks fairly butch.
P1Pepperpot 1
Perhaps it comes from next door.
P2Pepperpot 2
Penguins don't come from next door; they come from the Antarctic!
P2Pepperpot 2
Why'd you say 'Burma'?
P1Pepperpot 1
I panicked.
P2Pepperpot 2
Perhaps it's from the zoo.
P2Pepperpot 2
How should I know which zoo? I'm not Dr. Bloody Bronowski!
P1Pepperpot 1
How does Dr. Bronowski know which zoo it came from?
P2Pepperpot 2
He knows everything.
P1Pepperpot 1
Ooh, I wouldn't like that. It'd take the mystery out of life. Anyway, if it came from the zoo, it'd have 'Property of the Zoo' stamped on it.
P2Pepperpot 2
No it wouldn't. They don't stamp animals 'Property of the Zoo'! You couldn't stamp a huge lion!
P1Pepperpot 1
They stamp them when they're small.
P2Pepperpot 2
What happens when they moult?
P1Pepperpot 1
Lions don't moult!
P2Pepperpot 2
No, but penguins do. There! I've run rings around you, logically.
P1Pepperpot 1
Oh, intercourse the penguin!
RARadio Announcer
That was Part 2 of the death of Mary Queen of Scots; adapted for the radio. And now, Radio Four will explode. [intreval music plays until the radio suddenly combusts]
P1Pepperpot 1
We'll have to watch the telly then.
P1Pepperpot 1
Well, what's on the television then?
P2Pepperpot 2
Looks like a penguin.
P1Pepperpot 1
No, no, no, no! I didn't mean 'what's on the television set?' I meant 'what program?'
P2Pepperpot 2
Funny that penguin being there, isn't it? What's it doing there?
P2Pepperpot 2
I can see that!
P1Pepperpot 1
If it lays an egg, it will fall down the back of the television set.
P2Pepperpot 2
We'll have to watch that. Unless it's a male.
P1Pepperpot 1
Ooh, I hadn't thought of that.
P2Pepperpot 2
Yes. Looks fairly butch.
P1Pepperpot 1
Perhaps it comes from next door.
P2Pepperpot 2
Penguins don't come from next door; they come from the Antarctic!
P2Pepperpot 2
Why'd you say "Burma"?
P1Pepperpot 1
I panicked.
P2Pepperpot 2
Perhaps it's from the zoo.
P2Pepperpot 2
How should I know which zoo? I'm not Doctor Bloody Bernofsky!
P1Pepperpot 1
How does Doctor Bernofsky know which zoo it came from?
P2Pepperpot 2
He knows everything.
P1Pepperpot 1
Ooh, I wouldn't like that. It'd take all the mystery out of life. Anyway, if it came from the zoo, it'd have 'Property of the Zoo' stamped on it.
P2Pepperpot 2
No it wouldn't. They don't stamp animals 'Property of the Zoo'! You couldn't stamp a huge lion!
P1Pepperpot 1
They stamp them when they're small.
P2Pepperpot 2
What happens when they moult?
P1Pepperpot 1
Lions don't moult!
P2Pepperpot 2
No, but penguins do. There! I've run rings around you, logically.
P1Pepperpot 1
Oh, intercourse the penguin!
Monty Python's Flying Circus · 162 quotes