That was Part 2 of the death of Mary Queen of Scots; adapted for the radio. And now, Radio Four will explode. [intreval music plays until the radio suddenly combusts]
We'll have to watch the telly then.
Yes.
Well, what's on the television then?
Looks like a penguin.
No, no, no, no! I didn't mean 'what's on the television set?' I meant 'what program?'
Oh.
Funny that penguin being there, isn't it? What's it doing there?
Standing.
I can see that!
If it lays an egg, it will fall down the back of the television set.
We'll have to watch that. Unless it's a male.
Ooh, I hadn't thought of that.
Yes. Looks fairly butch.
Perhaps it comes from next door.
Penguins don't come from next door; they come from the Antarctic!
BURMA!
Why'd you say "Burma"?
I panicked.
Perhaps it's from the zoo.
Which zoo?
How should I know which zoo? I'm not Doctor Bloody Bernofsky!
How does Doctor Bernofsky know which zoo it came from?
He knows everything.
Ooh, I wouldn't like that. It'd take all the mystery out of life. Anyway, if it came from the zoo, it'd have 'Property of the Zoo' stamped on it.
No it wouldn't. They don't stamp animals 'Property of the Zoo'! You couldn't stamp a huge lion!
They stamp them when they're small.
What happens when they moult?
Lions don't moult!
No, but penguins do. There! I've run rings around you, logically.
Oh, intercourse the penguin!
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