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S1 E1

Monk · Season 1, Episode 1

“Mr. Monk and the Candidate” quotes from Monk

5 quotes

“Mr. Monk and the Candidate” · Season 1, Episode 1

In this episode: Sharona Fleming (4), Adrian Monk (3), Miranda St. Claire (2), Captain Leland Stottlemeyer (1)

[surveying a crime scene] The stove.

LGLt. Gitomer

Over here. It's in the kitchen.

No... I mean my stove. I-I think I left it on.

It's okay. I, uh, checked it as we were leaving.

Are you sure? Did you turn the knob?

The little knob, though?

I turned all the knobs. The stove is off, Adrian.

LGLt. Gitomer

We believe it was a burglary gone sour. She walked in, she surprised him, he panicked, he left there from the kitchen.

No. No. No, no. No. No. This-This was no burglary.

LGLt. Gitomer

It wasn't?

He tried to make it look like one, but this guy was cold as ice. He wore her slippers to avoid leaving shoe prints - not something your neighborhood crackhead is prone to do.

Adrian. Adrian. [she claps her hands to try to get Monk's attention]

[looking at the closet] He was in here. He was waiting.

LGLt. Gitomer

Waiting for what?

You know, for her. He was here at least an hour. He was smoking. You can still smell it on the curtains. [sniffs the curtains] Menthols. Salems. Possibly Newports.

LGLt. Gitomer

Maybe she was the smoker.

No. No, she was a Dutch Calvinist. They don't smoke. They consider their bodies to be a holy - a holy chalice of - [turns to Sharona] I'm sorry. I'm having trouble concentrating, because I think I smell gas. Did you hear the click? You gotta hear the click, not just feel the click. Hear it. [to the other detectives]

[Monk is silently wandering around a crime scene.]

PPolicewoman

What's he doing?

I love this part. He does this Zen Sherlock Holmes thing.

[Deputy Mayor Sheldon Burger comes in]

Oh, Sheldon Burger, who let you off your leash?

SBSheldon Burger

I just came from the hospital. Bodyguard didn't make it. Mayor's on his way back from Sacramento. Look, I don't have to tell you, Captain. We're on a bus to hell.

I understand.

SBSheldon Burger

If we don't slam dunk this, it's gonna look like we're not trying.

I'm not an idiot, Sheldon! I've got every available man on the case.

SBSheldon Burger

No, you don't. Mayor wants you to bring in... your old friend.

[in disbelief] Monk?

Let me ask you a question. How can you investigate anything? I'm told you're "germophobic," afraid of the dark, heights, crowds... and milk.

We're working on the milk. He's making good progress on milk.

Mrs. St. Claire, I - I sense that you're a little upset, but I can tell you why I dropped my keys. I've been a bit preoccupied with another case. A girl was murdered in Santa Clara. Uh, a Nicole Vasques. Did you know her?

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